Gil R.
Posts: 10821
Joined: 4/1/2005 Status: offline
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Okay, I’ve gone over these, and they’re all quite good and certainly usable. I’ve edited each one a bit, usually in terms of style, and consider them good to go (unless anyone has some info that should be added). First, some basic points: 1) The program can’t handle separate paragraphs, so everything should be written as a second long paragraph. 2) For less important generals, one should try to keep the bio short. While 3000 characters might be available, people are less likely to read long entries on guys they don’t really care about 3) When referring to other officers or politicians, give their title and full name, again for esthetics. So in the first sentence it said that Augur was “in the same class as Grant,” which I changed. 4) All ranks should be abbreviated to save space: Maj. Gen., Brig. Gen., Pres., etc. (This is only when used as a title, such as Maj. Gen. C.C. Augur – if you’re saying “C.C. Augur became a Major General” then it’s written out.) 5) The first sentence should always use the general’s name. So instead of “Born in New York, he graduated...” I’ve changed it to “Born in New York, Augur graduated...” It’s just stylistically better to do that. 6) Small numbers (say, under 20) should be written out: “thirteen Union and three Confederate,” not “13 Union and 3 confederate.” 7) At one point you referred to the war as “the rebellion,” but it’s best to be neutral and refer to it as the Civil War 8) I had to make some minor changes to switch from British English to our inferior variant (e.g., “organizational” rather than “organisational”). Also, I devised my own ratings for these five generals, but please let me know if you have suggestions for changes Maj. Gen. Christopher Colon Augur (b. 1821, d. 1898). Born in New York, Augur graduated West Point in 1843, finishing 16th out of 39 in a class that would provide thirteen Union and three Confederate generals, including Ulysses S. Grant. Note that I rewrote the previous sentence to make it flow more smoothly. Although he was present during some well known campaigns of the Civil War and has the reputation of being a competent battlefield commander, Augur was never to achieve the success or fame of some of the generals he came into contact with. During the war with Mexico he served as an aide-de-camp and fought creditably, and during the 1850’s he saw frontier service. He was promoted steadily and on May 14, 1861, attained the rank of Major in the Regular Army. At the outbreak of war he was Commandant of Cadets at West Point, but in November 1861 he was commissioned a Brigadier General of Volunteers, and joined McDowell's corps, where he commanded the 1st Brigade of 1st Division, later known as the Iron Brigade of the east Is this an actual nickname, in which case it should be in quotes?. Augur’s first Civil War action was on the Rappahannock during the Peninsular campaign. By August, 1862, he commanded a division, and fought Stonewall Jackson at Cedar Mountain under Maj. Gen. Nathaniel Banks. Although a defeat for the outnumbered Union troops, the Union performance was good. Augur and his fellow division commander Alpheus Williams Do you know Williams’s rank? I believe he would have been a brigadier general. attacked the Confederate line. Williams's troops broke the "Stonewall Brigade,” and severely damaged the rebel left. Augur's men were prevented from completing the defeat only by Jackson's drawing of his sword to rally the line. Maj. Gen. A.P. Hill Note that I added Hill’s rank at the time of the battle. Ideally, we should always provide that sort of information. was thus given time to reinforce and reform the rebel line. Augur's division was pushed back with the rest of Banks's corps. He was severely wounded in the right side during the ensuing rout. Augur was promoted brevet Major General of Volunteers in recognition of this performance, and in November, Banks, by now in New Orleans, specifically requested that Augur lead one of his divisions in the Louisiana campaign. I am deleting the following sentence because it’s not especially relevant, and therefore this seems a good way of shortening the entry a little: “Sherman also commanded a division under Banks in this campaign.” At the preparation for the siege of Port Hudson, Louisiana, Augur commanded an independent force, and had the center of the line during the assaults. In October, 1863, Augur was promoted to be commander of XXII Corps (Department of Washington), a post he held until 1866. Augur, who was promoted to brigadier general in March, 1865, and subsequently confirmed as brevet major general for services in the field during the Civil War, was the officer in command of the escort returning Pres. Abraham Lincoln's body to the White House after his assassination. After the war, Augur remained in the Army until 1885, returning to the frontier and acting as a signatory to several treaties with the Indians in the late 1860's. He is buried in Arlington National Cemetery. Initiative: Normal Leadership: Good Command: Great Tactics: Great
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