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RE: Steak Tartar - 2/10/2010 12:54:25 AM   
Onime No Kyo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

*******Officer's Mess, USS Enterprise, 90 mi East of Cooktown, 13:30, Dec. 25, 1941******

Cook: ...but he asked for it.


Ship's surgeon: Look, sailor, I am ordering you. Do NOT serve the Admiral any more raw hamburger. Do you realize what E. coli could do to his colon?


Who knew he had such gourmet tastes.

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Post #: 211
Kendari - 2/10/2010 11:08:13 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		It's almost as if the Japs are trying to trick us.

Jap troops announce themselves at Kendari in a most abrupt fashion. We need more search aircraft. (Dates corrected)








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< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 2/11/2010 2:48:52 PM >

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Post #: 212
Ignomy - 2/11/2010 2:59:56 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		So stalker girl gets this rescued 10 mos old puppy to keep my 7 year old dog happy. The thing has the coloring of a Rottweiler but the head of Australian Shepherd or something. She is surprisingly smart despite her tiny little head. And my 85 lb lab plays with her like a puppy herself. It really has worked out well...except...well, you see, she was billed as being "crate trained", which as far as I can tell means she wont **** in a crate, just everywhere else.

So yesterday AM I spy a giant tootsie roll that really looks like it came from another species. My first thought was..."ouch the poor thing". Then I came back to reality..."serves her right". Anyway, Stalker Girl is off to work, so it is down to me. I grab a shovel and some newspaper and carry the stuff outside and chuck it on the hill. The tootsie roll ends up on top of the paper, dead center over a big picture of Peyton Manning.

"Hmmm...Kismet".

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Post #: 213
Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 3:14:40 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		One of the most exciting things about AE is how battles often turn on decisions made 2 game weeks (or longer) ahead of time and, even when you start to feel prescient, that is when the fit is going to hit the Shan. The current battle in Kendari is a good example. The movement of Boise from Soerabaja to help will be delayed a day because she just came out of a repair stand-down 2 days ago and the paint is apparently not dry yet. Similarly, the movement of the US carriers racing through the Torres Strait was begun nearly 2 weeks ago off Tarawa. I had originally planned to refuel at Brisbane but decided on Sydney in order to take on more fighters and convert one bomber squadron to SBD's from SB2U's. This added perhaps two day. On the transit past Port Moresby, two of the escort DD's collided, slowing Halsey's ships by perhaps 200 miles of travel before the damaged DD could be detached. Now they are two days out from a strike from Kendari, even at a sprint.

There is already a good size Jap force ashore at Kendari with armor, so the bastion will likely fall, but we might still be able to inflict a serious blow. Force Z and the Dutch cruisers are headed East from Soerabaja. If the US carriers can neutralize the Jap light carriers, it could be serious carnage. Exciting stuff. New Search aircraft are moved in to make sure it is not a trap with the KB about.


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Post #: 214
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 4:52:26 PM   
BrucePowers


Posts: 12094
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline 		That trap thing would really be bad.

Have you sent the commanders of the search squadrons to Leavenworth yet or are you trying to save the political points

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Post #: 215
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 4:52:39 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		That was damned unsporting, sneaking around like that.

Tally ho!

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



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Post #: 216
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 5:19:55 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

That was damned unsporting, sneaking around like that.

Tally ho!


Indeed! Damned unsporting. It merely reinforces my distrust of the Little Yellow Bastards. I propose we give them a sound thrashing to serve as a lesson on etiquette.

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Post #: 217
RE: Ignomy - 2/11/2010 5:21:29 PM   
witpqs


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

She is surprisingly smart despite her tiny little head.


Stalker Girl?

quote:

I had originally planned to refuel at Brisbane but decided on Sydney in order to take on more fighters and convert one bomber squadron to SBD's from SB2U's.


Be careful about when you perform squadron upgrades - very different than WITP. When you first upgrade the new planes get a big boost of maintenance time. I've seen it be nearly a month before all planes in a carrier squadron became ready, although it seems to vary. Many people have taken to coordinating upgrades with carrier maintenance.

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Post #: 218
RE: Ignomy - 2/11/2010 5:32:25 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

She is surprisingly smart despite her tiny little head.


Stalker Girl?




quote:

quote:

I had originally planned to refuel at Brisbane but decided on Sydney in order to take on more fighters and convert one bomber squadron to SBD's from SB2U's.


Be careful about when you perform squadron upgrades - very different than WITP. When you first upgrade the new planes get a big boost of maintenance time. I've seen it be nearly a month before all planes in a carrier squadron became ready, although it seems to vary. Many people have taken to coordinating upgrades with carrier maintenance.


Hmmm...the dive bomber upgrade seemed to go well. One carrier has F3F's, the other has Buffalos. I didn't upgrade the Buffalos as there were not enough F3F's in the pool....just filled out the fighter squadrons to 27 planes.

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Post #: 219
RE: Ignomy - 2/11/2010 6:00:11 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		ETA: Never mind. Quicker fingers and minds than my own have the jump on my observation...

< Message edited by Chickenboy -- 2/11/2010 6:54:23 PM >

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Post #: 220
RE: Ignomy - 2/11/2010 6:01:48 PM   
Chickenboy


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From: San Antonio, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
she was billed as being "crate trained", which as far as I can tell means she wont **** in a crate, just everywhere else.

Yeah, that's what that means, alright. PM me if you want some dog housebreaking tips. Oh, you may want to invest in a carpet cleaner and new shoes too.

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Post #: 221
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 6:09:31 PM   
Onime No Kyo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

That was damned unsporting, sneaking around like that.

Tally ho!


Indeed! Damned unsporting. It merely reinforces my distrust of the Little Yellow Bastards. I propose we give them a sound thrashing to serve as a lesson on etiquette.



But like proper gentlemen you will wait 3 years to do so?

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

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Post #: 222
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 7:10:55 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
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From: Southern California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

That was damned unsporting, sneaking around like that.

Tally ho!


Indeed! Damned unsporting. It merely reinforces my distrust of the Little Yellow Bastards. I propose we give them a sound thrashing to serve as a lesson on etiquette.



But like proper gentlemen you will wait 3 years to do so?


The hope is the destruction of Ryujo, Taiyo and her air crews and the destruction of all the support vessels at Kendari will deliver a message. Failing that, I have entered a sternly worded complaint to the War in the Pacific/Admirals Edition Sneaky and Unsporting Behavior Plenary Review Committee.

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Post #: 223
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 10:48:12 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		We thought about doing a stand up fight adhering to the Queensbury rules and all that but Kendari will be more like a swift kick in the cobblers and run away.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 224
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 11:02:55 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		What do you guys have against Celebes shoe menders?

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Post #: 225
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/11/2010 11:04:52 PM   
Mynok


Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
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quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior
swift kick in the cobblers and run away.


Well THAT's definitely unsporting, especially combined with sneaking around.

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Post #: 226
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 1:24:12 AM   
Onime No Kyo


Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

That was damned unsporting, sneaking around like that.

Tally ho!


Indeed! Damned unsporting. It merely reinforces my distrust of the Little Yellow Bastards. I propose we give them a sound thrashing to serve as a lesson on etiquette.



But like proper gentlemen you will wait 3 years to do so?


The hope is the destruction of Ryujo, Taiyo and her air crews and the destruction of all the support vessels at Kendari will deliver a message. Failing that, I have entered a sternly worded complaint to the War in the Pacific/Admirals Edition Sneaky and Unsporting Behavior Plenary Review Committee.



I'm sure the complaint was duly logged.

_____________________________

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Post #: 227
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 1:25:05 AM   
Onime No Kyo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

We thought about doing a stand up fight adhering to the Queensbury rules and all that but Kendari will be more like a swift kick in the cobblers and run away.


I thought they were called yarbles. I'm so confused.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

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Post #: 228
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 1:39:43 AM   
aprezto


Posts: 824
Joined: 1/29/2009
Status: offline 		Call them what you will, same effect after a kick in them.

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Image courtesy of Divepac

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Post #: 229
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 3:57:59 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
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From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

What do you guys have against Celebes shoe menders?


I never trust anyone who swears off sex, ragardless of their occupation.

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Post #: 230
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 5:28:25 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Elsewhere:



Singkawing (Western Borneo), Palembang (Sumatra) and Kendari all fell on the same day.

PI: All uniformed personnel in Luzon have been pulled back to the San Miguel Line (Gen. MacArthur was unwilling to give up the brewery). Clark is a level 2 fortification. Manila is only level 1 but is an urban hex, of course. The Japs are still running fighter sweeps over Clark and I am trading losses of P-40's to Zeroes at about 1.25/1. Almost all of Asian Fleet HQ has been got out by PBY. This should be helpful when it comes time for offensive operations. Jap DD's are laying off Manila to intercept outgoing or ingoing vessels. No attack has been made on Mindanao.

New Britain: 2 BB's are bombarding Rabaul. I wouldn't give a plugged nickel for the poor Aussies chances stationed there either. The place is indefensible. Kavineg is in Jap hands.

New Caledonia: A train of convoys are on their way. They are going to have to fight for it if they want it.

New Guinea: One Jap landing in Northern New Guinea...otherwise quiet.

Malaya: One Sqadron AVG (All Volunteer Group) arrived today.
As Lord Admiral Sprior put it, they may give the "bullies in the Zeroes a surprise".

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Post #: 231
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 4:07:54 PM   
Mynok


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Isn't Clark also mountain terrain? I believe that is pretty close to the same defensive value as urban.

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Post #: 232
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 7:40:36 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Tromp is ordered to head back to Soerabja. The Dutch DD's and remaining CL will close on Kendari as will Force Z. There seems to be a single BB there (Yamashiro) incorporated in an escort TF. Taiyo and Ryujo have 3 CA's as escorts. Kendari may have Jap planes next turn. As a consequence, the B-17's at Ambon and Borneo are ordered to attack the airfield.

The US arriers are going to try to sprint up to 80 M SE of Kendari. They are low on fuel (but not red) so they will likely fall short. It may be the TBD's will be out of the battle. Carrier CAP is set to 70%. There are 26 operational F3F's and 20 Brewstrers.




Attachment (1)

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 2/12/2010 7:44:08 PM >

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Post #: 233
RE: Kombat Kismet - 2/12/2010 11:01:23 PM   
Onime No Kyo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
As a consequence, the B-17's at Ambon and Borneo are ordered to attack the airfield.


If it doesnt move, maybe they'll even hit it. You never know with there pesky islands, though.

_____________________________

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Post #: 234
The Fit hits the Shan - 2/13/2010 4:29:20 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		********Bridge of USS Lexington, 07:15, Dec. 28, 1941********

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): <enters bridge sipping coffee> Good morning Shermie.

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): Good morning, sir.

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): Ah, call me Brownie, Shermie.

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): Yes sir, I mean Brownie. How is your coffee, Brownie?

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): A bit tepid to be honest, Shermie.

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): I am not surprised, Brownie. I am afraid I have some good news and bad news.

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): All ears, Shermie.

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): Well, Brownie, you know the order you gave to "top off" the destroyers last night?

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): Yes?

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): Well, it went swimmingly, Brownie, and the Fire Safety Officer reports very low fire danger today.

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): SPLENDID! That is the good news, I take it, Shermie?

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): Yes, sir.

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): And the bad?

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): Well, Brownie, it seems the Chief Logistics Officer was a bit too exuberant in his effort to "top off" the destroyers. We are at zero fuel oil.

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): Surely you mean bingo, not zero Shermie?

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): No Brownie, I mean zero.

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): Admiral, do you mean to tell me we can't even turn into the wind?

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): Yes...Admiral. I have taken the liberty to ask Ellet to come alongside and transfer fuel. Now you see why your coffee is cold.

Guy with headphones: CIC REPORTS MANY BOGIES INBOUND, BEARING THREE FIVE ZERO, RANGE 60 MILES!

VAdm. Brown (TF CO): AJJJJJJJ! JESUS CRISTO, MI SALVADOR! MY PENSION! MY PENSION! <swoons>

RAdm. Sherman (Ship's Captain)): <glances at swooning comrade> BATTLE STATIONS! WAVE OFF ELLET. RADIO ENTERPRISE AND SEE IF SHE CAN COVER US. EXECUTE PLAN "R" FOR RONCO.

PA announcement: BATTLE STATIONS! BATTLES STATIONS! EXECUTE EMERGENCY PLAN "R" FOR RONCO, REPEAT "R" FOR RONCO. DESIGNATED RUNNER FOR EACH BATTLE STATION TO DELIVER ALL WORKING LIGHTERS TO ENGINE ROOM NUMBER ONE IMMEDIATELY!


* "swoon" is a 19th and early 20th Century word for "faint". It use is now normally reserved for romance novels. Though considered unmanly, it is just possible for an Admiral to do this in 1941, especially when he is having a Kimmel moment.

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Post #: 235
RE: The Fit hits the Shan - 2/13/2010 4:43:47 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		Ah, I think they're executing plan "Ronson", not plan Ronco. The latter would involve immediate emergency transferrence of all rotisserie chicken cookers to the aft engine spaces.

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Post #: 236
RE: The Fit hits the Shan - 2/13/2010 4:55:08 PM   
witpqs


Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline 		...and communicating via Mr. Microphone!

"Hey, good lookin', we'll come back to sink you later!"

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Post #: 237
RE: The Fit hits the Shan - 2/13/2010 8:26:23 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		Yes, I think that plan may have been promulgated by RADM R. Popeil.

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Post #: 238
RE: The Fit hits the Shan - 2/13/2010 10:11:04 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Oh sure, "Lady Lex" is in mortal peril and everyone is just yucking it up. Now I know which side you guys are one.


*****USS Lexington, Banda Sea, 07:21, Dec. 28, 1941********

Through a tragic malaprop, Seaman Maldonado of number 2 mount (1.1 in. quad) is about to become the first casualty of the Second Battle of the Banda Sea. He has raced aft as instructed with his awkward load. He flies down a ladder, lands heavily and pitches forward. 12 inches of tempered steel pierces his right hand. The remainder of the George Foreman Party Grill and Rotiserie is distrubted randomly in the passageway.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 2/13/2010 10:12:08 PM >

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Post #: 239
RE: The Fit hits the Shan - 2/13/2010 10:17:54 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Just noticed. Admiral Nelson-san has started a counterthread entitled:

Imperials Sons-- There is no Diego Garcia Here

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 240
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