RE: Dancing with the Stars

Matrix Games Forums

Forums Register Login Photo Gallery Member List Search Calendars FAQ

My Profile Inbox Address Book My Subscription My Forums Log Out

RE: Dancing with the Stars

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

Users viewing this topic: none

Printable Version

All Forums >> [New Releases from Matrix Games] >> War in the Pacific: Admiral's Edition >> After Action Reports >> RE: Dancing with the Stars

Page: << < prev 100 101 [102] 103 104 next > >>

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:04:12 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3031

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:10:39 PM

Chickenboy

Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

A guy is in his physician's office talking with him after a checkup. The patient hadn't been feeling well and went it to get some laboratory testing performed.

Physician: I've got some good news and bad news...

Patient: Alright, what's the bad news?

Physician: You've got HAGS.

Patient (looking puzzled): What is "HAGS"?

Physician: A combination of herpes, AIDS, gonnorhea and syphillis.

Patient (alarmed): Oh my.....um....oh no. What's the good news?

Physician: You get to eat all the pancakes, pizza and crepes that you want.

Patient: Huh? Why pancakes, pizza and crepes?

Physician: Because those are the only things they'll be able to slide under the door to ya'.

_____________________________

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3032

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:12:04 PM

Chickenboy

Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

Does this story, by chance, have relevance in the pre-Christmas spirit or, perhaps is it in the spirit of our New Year?

_____________________________

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3033

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:37:25 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

Does this story, by chance, have relevance in the pre-Christmas spirit or, perhaps is it in the spirit of our New Year?

No...not really...it's more in line with descending to the 7th level of Hell...whatever that holiday is.

(in reply to Chickenboy)

Post #: 3034

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:41:23 PM

sprior

Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

And then I'll tell you about the bloke I met in a 7-Eleven in Cocoa Beach at 3am.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3035

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:50:50 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

*NOTE: Don't try this at home. It doesn't really work for "everything", just gonorrhea and chlamydia. It might work for PID or primary syphillis but I wouldn't count on it. If you have any of these things go to a church and say 500 Hail Marys and then get thee to a clinic. If you are male and have PID you could also probably make some money selling your story to the National Enquirer. If you are muslim then don't go to a church and say the Hail Marys or you...ah....never mind..

Hmmm.....PID.....PID....

Ah...."Although an STI is often the cause, many other routes are possible, including lymphatic, postpartum, postabortal (either miscarriage or abortion) or intrauterine device (IUD) related, and hematogenous spread. Two thirds of patients with laparoscopic evidence of previous PID were not aware they had PID."

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3036

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:54:46 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

And then I'll tell you about the bloke I met in a 7-Eleven in Cocoa Beach at 3am.

Wait...you don't mean the one on Manatee Ln, do you?

(in reply to sprior)

Post #: 3037

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 9:56:32 PM

sprior

Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

Were you there in 1985? I think your marriage on the Space Shuttle was cancelled.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3038

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 10:00:44 PM

Reg

Posts: 2787
Joined: 5/26/2000
From: NSW, Australia
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

Does this story, by chance, have relevance in the pre-Christmas spirit or, perhaps is it in the spirit of our New Year?

No...not really...it's more in line with descending to the 7th level of Hell...whatever that holiday is.

Yep, that sounds like the Christmas holidays.....

(You've seen National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation haven't you??

Sometimes it's not far from the truth....

)

_____________________________

Cheers,
Reg.

(One day I will learn to spell - or check before posting....)
Uh oh, Firefox has a spell checker!! What excuse can I use now!!!

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3039

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/18/2010 10:11:40 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

Were you there in 1985? I think your marriage on the Space Shuttle was cancelled.

Just as well, the corkage fee that NASA charges is astronomical.

(in reply to sprior)

Post #: 3040

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 1:04:21 AM

BrucePowers

Posts: 12094
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

And then I'll tell you about the bloke I met in a 7-Eleven in Cocoa Beach at 3am.

The one on A!A or the one on State Road 520?

(in reply to sprior)

Post #: 3041

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 1:05:42 AM

BrucePowers

Posts: 12094
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Somebody remind me to tell the story about the quite literally crazy ex roomate of my ex-neighbor who used to be married to the hot Native-American with the bolt-ons.

I think it should wait for later in the war when the level of cynicism is greater.

And then I'll tell you about the bloke I met in a 7-Eleven in Cocoa Beach at 3am.

Wait...you don't mean the one on Manatee Ln, do you?

The one on Manatee Lane was a Shop 'N Go.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3042

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 1:08:40 AM

BrucePowers

Posts: 12094
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

Were you there in 1985? I think your marriage on the Space Shuttle was cancelled.

Just as well, the corkage fee that NASA charges is astronomical.

Well what do you want? It was a Space Shuttle fer cryin' out loud

We don't launch the things with diet coke and mentos ya know

< Message edited by BrucePowers -- 12/19/2010 1:09:10 AM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3043

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 9:18:28 AM

sprior

Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

quote:

The one on A!A or the one on State Road 520?

It was dark and I was very, er, tired.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.

(in reply to BrucePowers)

Post #: 3044

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 1:25:36 PM

BrucePowers

Posts: 12094
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

They all look the same in the dark.

(in reply to sprior)

Post #: 3045

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 6:39:08 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

***********Office of CINCPAC, Pearl Harbor, June 24, 1942********

Aide: Message from Eastern Fleet Sir, a placed called Kandy.

Adm. Kimmel: Where is that, New Jersey shore?

Aide: No sir, it's well West of us, in Ceylon, I believe.

Adm. Kimmel: Why do they call it Eastern Fleet, then?

Aide: Beats me sir. I think it's some kind of British thing, sir.

Adm. Kimmel: Probably right. Don't they know I have enough problems with the Pearl Harbor commission? If I hadn't got the House Rules down in writing I would be Supply Officer of the Brooklyn Naval Yard by now.

Aide: Yes sir.

Adm. Kimmel: All right, let me see it. <receives message, which reads....."JJ has landed at Suva blah blah blah blah blah blah">. What the Hell? It's still in code.

Aide: No sir, that is how it decodes.

Adm. Kimmel: Goddamnit! Why don't those people learn to speak English.

Aide: Yes sir.

Adm. Kimmel: What the Hell is "JJ"? Suva, isn't that in Georgia?

Aide: I think you mean Savannah, sir.

Adm. Kimmel: Oh, right. Well, find out what "JJ" is and find out where "Suva" is and get those geeks over in codebreaking to work on teh "Blah balh" thing.

Aide: Geeks, sir?

Adm. Kimmel: Yes, geeks. You know pasty-faced, poor personal hygeine, thick eyeglasses, virgins till their mid 30's...those guys...

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3046

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 6:42:22 PM

rtrapasso

Posts: 22653
Joined: 9/3/2002
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

quote:

The one on A!A or the one on State Road 520?

It was dark and I was very, er, tired.

quote:

They all look the same in the dark.

And, of course, when you are, er, "tired."

(in reply to sprior)

Post #: 3047

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 6:47:05 PM

sprior

Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: rtrapasso

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

quote:

The one on A!A or the one on State Road 520?

It was dark and I was very, er, tired.

quote:

They all look the same in the dark.

And, of course, when you are, er, "tired."

Are we still talking about 7-Elevens?

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.

(in reply to rtrapasso)

Post #: 3048

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 7:10:21 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

Are we still talking about 7-Elevens?

(in reply to sprior)

Post #: 3049

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 7:11:35 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

It is confirmed. I am a genius. More to follow. First I need to by some palstic sheeting. I have a leak on my balcony.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3050

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 7:56:40 PM

princep01

Posts: 943
Joined: 8/7/2006
From: Texas
Status: offline

Mandrake, old boy, your spelling is leading to great confusion here. Did you mean you have a leek on your balcony? Almost all balconies leak. They drain that way, you see. If they didn't, you'd have a second (or higher) story swimming pool that was very prone to breaking off and falling forthwith onto all and sundry below. Very unneighborly and also likely to land you in the civil courts on the wrong side. And what is this "palstic"? Is this some form of medical mumbo-jumbo that occasionally leaks into your vocabulary? Is it a palsy....a palsied sheet? That makes no sense at all.

While you are at it, please see if you can explain these "JJ" and "Suva" things. My aide is diligently trying to run down the meaning of these terms, but having little luck. You have liasioned with the British before, pehaps you can make sense of this. Sometimes the English seem to go completely out of their way to contort their own language into meaningless gibberish. They will call a wrench a "spanner" for no discernable reason at all. Then it often gets confused with "wench" and we're soon talking about women with loose morals.

It's all so confusing.

Adm. Kimmel

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3051

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 8:22:33 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

This is no ordinary leak...it is in the MIDDLE of the balcony. It's coming through the light fixture of the balcony below and there is a crack in the stucco.

Couldn't find any palstic at Lowes. Most of those guys are failed plumbing contractors but they act like you are some kind of idiot when you ask a simple question. So I went over to the grocery store and the female clerks new exactly what I was talking about. Go figure

I also have water on the downstairs bathroom floor. I need to go check the rain downspot on the flat part of the roof. Uggh.

While I was scrolling through the air groups on Enterprise, the information on the Torpedo Daitai from Hosho showed up.

I guess the geeks in codebreaking deserve some credit.

I clicked out as soon as I figured out what happened but I can't unremember what I saw...they are on 70% ASW and Hosho is out of torps.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3052

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 8:50:49 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

Here is the genius part

The LYB's landed at Suva (which is in Fiji, by the way). Now I am happy I sent 182nd Regt back. Today I ordered a Tank Bn., 2nd Marine Def. Bn. and a Marine Raider Bn. back to Suva. I meant to send some arty but then the balcony started leaking....bah...weather is such a big factor in this game.

Plan Tango will have to change a bit as the carriers have moved South to cover the landing at Suva, of course.

Attachment (1)

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3053

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/19/2010 8:51:17 PM

Mynok

Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline

Aren't you in southern California? And you are worried about rain? You sure it isn't a HOA goon whizzing in your gutters?

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3054

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/20/2010 5:36:09 AM

Moondawggie

Posts: 403
Joined: 10/18/2003
From: Placer County CA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

It is confirmed. I am a genius. More to follow. First I need to by some palstic sheeting. I have a leak on my balcony.

We never doubted it. But if you had asked for "Plastic Sheeting" instead of "palstic," maybe the pros at Home Depot would have figured out what the heck you wanted...

_____________________________

"The Yankees got all the smart ones, and look where it got them."

General George Pickett, the night before Gettysburg

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3055

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/20/2010 8:31:24 AM

erstad

Posts: 1944
Joined: 8/3/2004
From: Midwest USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

Recommend you consider one FG sweeping the Nadi hex at altitude. Undoubtedly, he's LRCAPing his invasion TFs there.

Good idea to further fatigue his Zeroes. He is indeed flying LRCAP over Nadi. Right now there is only one operational P-40B on Fiji . I am trying to unload P-39's at Samoa. I could fly in some Marine F4F's when they get in range but they are part of the carrier F4F complement.

How do you sweep over your own base? I've never been successful with that.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3056

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/20/2010 5:33:29 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: erstad

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

Recommend you consider one FG sweeping the Nadi hex at altitude. Undoubtedly, he's LRCAPing his invasion TFs there.

Good idea to further fatigue his Zeroes. He is indeed flying LRCAP over Nadi. Right now there is only one operational P-40B on Fiji . I am trying to unload P-39's at Samoa. I could fly in some Marine F4F's when they get in range but they are part of the carrier F4F complement.

How do you sweep over your own base? I've never been successful with that.

From Nadi over Suva or vice versa

(in reply to erstad)

Post #: 3057

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/20/2010 5:55:30 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

OK...pretend I didn't read the rules. Given sufficient fuel, how far exactly will Yorktown and her escorts move if I set to "super-secret warp factor 8" speed.

Our 3 lead carriers closed on Suva and are in good position but Yorktown is about 6 or 7 hexes behind, having stopped to see the largest floating ball of twine at Niue.

The Jap carriers have retired 4-5 hexes West of Fiji to refuel (they have been joined by oilers).

This constitutes a very good opportunity for Admiral English's cruiser force to raid the Japs unloading at Suva. It is not a good position for a carrier battle as to be assured of a good launch range, I would have to close near Suva (West or South) with the three lead carriers (Hornet, Enterprise and Illustrious) which are adequately fueled in a position near Vava'u. This might leave Yorktown out of the battle and subject the lead groupt to the Netties

I am tempted to raid with English's cruisers and surge in 50-60 SBD's and 50-60 F4F's from thecarriers to Suva, which is now fully operational. This is the approach that sank a Jap carriers and flamed two at New Scotland.

Suva has no Air Hq and only about 85-90 ground support points.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 12/20/2010 5:56:17 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3058

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/20/2010 6:36:21 PM

Alfred

Posts: 6685
Joined: 9/28/2006
Status: offline

Any chance of screen shot of the Yorktown TF so we can reverse engineer the "super-secret warp factor 8" and give a considered response?

Alfred

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)

Post #: 3059

RE: Dancing with the Stars - 12/20/2010 7:25:00 PM

Cap Mandrake

Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Alfred

Any chance of screen shot of the Yorktown TF so we can reverse engineer the "super-secret warp factor 8" and give a considered response?

Alfred

I am slaving away at work to buy Christmas presents.

At standard speed the predicted move is 9/4. At super-secret warp factor 8 it shows 9/9. The smallest DD in the TF shows over 5000 fuel. Pago Pago is home port.