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RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 3:16:13 PM

USSAmerica

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Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
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Damn, Nik! Really sorry to hear that!

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me

Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Nikademus)

Post #: 12871

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 3:21:19 PM

witpqs

Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline

Sorry for your troubles, mate. Life will go on, and be good. Keep your chin up.

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Post #: 12872

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 3:26:56 PM

Grollub

Posts: 6674
Joined: 10/9/2005
From: Lulea, Sweden
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

tithe....

my partner of eight years has seperated from me. Apparantly the allure of Feed [Manager] Boy at her job was too much. I currently live with a mannequin where there used to be someone i loved. flip a switch.....pop the cork....the genie is out of the bottle.

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�Not mastering metaphores is like cooking pasta when the train is delayed"

(in reply to Nikademus)

Post #: 12873

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 3:36:38 PM

Terminus

Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline

Ah crap, Nik. That sucks.

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We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

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Post #: 12874

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:02:32 PM

warspite1

Posts: 41353
Joined: 2/2/2008
From: England
Status: offline

Nik - we don't know each other, but you poured your heart out on the forum so I hope you don't mind me adding my 2 cents:

Similar thing happened to me 14 years ago. My wife and I had been together eight years, when she decided that she did not want to be with me anymore. She found someone else while on a work course.

Hurt like hell at the time and when anyone told me things would get better I would smile politely while inwardly "knowing" that was impossible....

Fact is, 14 years, and two lovely kids later, life couldn't be better - turned out my wife did me a huge, huge favour.

So yeah, I am very sorry to read what happened

, understand what you are going through, and really hope that things turn out okay - I'm sure they will.

_____________________________

England expects that every man will do his duty. Horatio Nelson October 1805

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Post #: 12875

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:22:42 PM

sprior

Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

tithe....

my partner of eight years has seperated from me. Apparantly the allure of Feed [Manager] Boy at her job was too much. I currently live with a mannequin where there used to be someone i loved. flip a switch.....pop the cork....the genie is out of the bottle.

Sorry to hear that Nik. Life will be good again. Honest.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.

(in reply to Nikademus)

Post #: 12876

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:31:48 PM

Chickenboy

Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

tithe....

my partner of eight years has seperated from me. Apparantly the allure of Feed [Manager] Boy at her job was too much. I currently live with a mannequin where there used to be someone i loved. flip a switch.....pop the cork....the genie is out of the bottle.

Hi Nik,

I'm sorry to hear that things have come to this. I hope you don't mind if I say I'm a bit confused by your post though. None of my business, I know, but are you saying that you've separated (one has moved out) or that you are currently emotionally distanced / separated?

I hope you don't mind some more unsolicited advice? Are you sure it's too late to talk it out a bit? Would couples counseling be possible? I know it was a necessity for Mrs. Chickenboy and I to get over a rough patch in our relationship way back when. I'm really glad that we did it, as it saved our marriage. I'd recommend at least giving it a shot.

Anyways, I'm sorry for your situation. It sucks. Feel free to come here and participate in our usual banal THREAD drivel and vent all you want, dude.

_____________________________

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Post #: 12877

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:34:09 PM

JWE

Posts: 6580
Joined: 7/19/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus
tithe....

my partner of eight years has seperated from me. Apparantly the allure of Feed [Manager] Boy at her job was too much. I currently live with a mannequin where there used to be someone i loved. flip a switch.....pop the cork....the genie is out of the bottle.

Oh, Jeez Nik, that's bad news. Don and I both been there pretty recently, so if you need an ear ... meantime, just hang in there. Trust me, the world does turn.

(in reply to Nikademus)

Post #: 12878

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:39:44 PM

BrucePowers

Posts: 12094
Joined: 7/3/2004
Status: offline

Sorry to hear that Nik.

(in reply to JWE)

Post #: 12879

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:42:10 PM

anarchyintheuk

Posts: 3921
Joined: 5/5/2004
From: Dallas
Status: offline

Condolences Nik.

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Post #: 12880

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:44:30 PM

Nikademus

Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline

we are seperated in all that matters, but not yet physically. She wants it, but so far has sat on the issue. I am at the point where I will take action as i told her that while decisions should not be hasty, she couldn't take too long to "decide" who she wants to be with. Initially, i was against the idea of seperation as i figured she would just hook up with Feed Boy faster, but now...after four days of living with a stranger, I need to get away from it. I've begun offloading all of my posessions.

No...i don't see a much of a chance for reconciliation. After all, as she explained to me, this wasn't 'really' about Feed Boy.......it was really about the fact that she has not been happy for a long time. Apparantly this is all my fault, and her friends all agree.....i am a piece of ****. Never mind that she is the one contemplating cheating or dumping me for the upgrade.

During the shock and awe phase, i promised her anything and everything....that i would make changes, that i loved her......but in the end all she could say in reply was "I don't know." Her curiosity is fueled by the fact that she's never been with another person and now that i'm on a more even keel.....even if she were to decide in my favor, i wonder given how unhappy she says she's been how long till the next crisis or until she cheats.

Like a friend of mine said.....the genie is now out of the bottle, you can't put it back.

She won't do counciling....even had she med benies.

I may.....for the first time, once i have a home again.

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Post #: 12881

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:46:00 PM

Chickenboy

Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

PM sent...

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Post #: 12882

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 4:51:07 PM

Dixie

Posts: 10303
Joined: 3/10/2006
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

tithe....

my partner of eight years has seperated from me. Apparantly the allure of Feed [Manager] Boy at her job was too much. I currently live with a mannequin where there used to be someone i loved. flip a switch.....pop the cork....the genie is out of the bottle.

Sorry to hear that mate.

_____________________________

Bigger boys stole my sig

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Post #: 12883

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:00:27 PM

Nikademus

Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

PM sent...

if meant for me...havn't gotten it.

edit....came thru.

< Message edited by Nikademus -- 2/9/2011 5:09:12 PM >

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Post #: 12884

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:13:18 PM

Mynok

Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

tithe....

my partner of eight years has seperated from me. Apparantly the allure of Feed [Manager] Boy at her job was too much. I currently live with a mannequin where there used to be someone i loved. flip a switch.....pop the cork....the genie is out of the bottle.

Aw, crap.

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

(in reply to Nikademus)

Post #: 12885

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:17:43 PM

Mynok

Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline

I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but like warspite said, sometimes these things turn out for the better. When you have completed the grieving and transition process, you should consider a change of location. I know you've been struggling to find an IT job out there, whereas down here in the Triangle, we have quite a lot of them hanging about. Just something to consider when you are ready to.

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

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Post #: 12886

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:24:02 PM

Nikademus

Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok

I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but like warspite said, sometimes these things turn out for the better. When you have completed the grieving and transition process, you should consider a change of location. I know you've been struggling to find an IT job out there, whereas down here in the Triangle, we have quite a lot of them hanging about. Just something to consider when you are ready to.

I am ready to move now.....after I tracked down the last of my old friends and found out that he had also moved away, that was the sign for me. I've been living in xGFU's microworld for so long i've been out of touch. Only question is when......i don't have alot of fundage so may stick around with a mobile address for a bit and then head south.....Houston and Boston are two options i have. 20 years in Seattle is enough i guess. Losing the library and 'putors is hard but as one friend said....they are only material posessions.

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Post #: 12887

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:24:56 PM

witpqs

Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline

Nik - Happiness is a person's own responsibility.

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Post #: 12888

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:33:26 PM

bradfordkay

Posts: 8683
Joined: 3/24/2002
From: Olympia, WA
Status: offline

Don't get rid of the whole library, Nik... you'll find a way to move at least some of it. And you have to keep at least one computer for AE and THE THREAD!!! (sorry, LOG!!!).

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fair winds,
Brad

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Post #: 12889

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:48:22 PM

Nikademus

Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline

i will try to preserve my air research books....(Shores, Bergstrom etc) but pretty much the rest will have to go as will all desktops. Some of my references i've had since childhood but admitedly, don't really touch them anymore....including a very worn copy of German Encyclopedia of WWII tanks. (maybe i'll find space for that one) My main machine failed completely anyway....the dreaded ASUS "CPU INIT" bug of which they have no fix for. I've already spent hours trying to resolve it, including resetting/clearing the BIOS complete with pulling out the battery. It "almost" worked, but then the video konked out. I'll probably strip down both my P4 and the core2 machine to parts and store them with my tool kits....to someday maybe rebuild....like the rest of my life. cases can be replaced as can the MoBo for my core2 machine.

Hopefully i can get away with (ironically) one of the macBooks and my essential files and programs.

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Post #: 12890

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:50:05 PM

radar

Posts: 337
Joined: 11/17/2007
From: Dayton, Ohio
Status: offline

Sad news day on THE THREAD!!! My honest-to-God best to Eric and Nik. Hope you both pull up from the nose dive. Crash and burn is not an option.

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USS Terry (DD-513) � Battle of the Atlantic, Solomon and Marianas Islands campaigns and the Battle of Iwo Jima

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Post #: 12891

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:55:00 PM

radar

Posts: 337
Joined: 11/17/2007
From: Dayton, Ohio
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

ORIGINAL: gladiatt

quote:

ORIGINAL: warspite1

Yeah b***** French - can't do anything right

You're right. Just look at News on french TV : we are always screewing things....but pretend not; or it was not our fault !!
Now, just look at me : i screw everything, and i pretend it, so no one can blame me for hidding...
Now, look at the past : how many time a french was involved in something good ?

Platon, Socrate, Aristote : not french
Hyppocrate : not french
Copernic, Kepller, Galilee, Newton : not french
Darwin : not french
Bill Gates ....oh wait, this one is not an example.
Sun Tzu, Confucius, Jesus, Mahomet, Boudha, (as builders of new thinking) : not french.
Cesar, Hannibal, Patton, Gengis Khan, Knut I, Belisaire : not french.
Napoleon : not french.....corsican !

.....................
OK, this post was intended to be funny.
But in fact i don't even manage to make myself smile. Sorry buddys, just not in the mood right now.
I hope i offended no one.

Catherine Deneuve,
Bridget Bardot

Sophie Marceau

Let me add French onion soup, French bread, French wines plus a beautiful language, capital city and countryside.

_____________________________

USS Terry (DD-513) � Battle of the Atlantic, Solomon and Marianas Islands campaigns and the Battle of Iwo Jima

(in reply to USSAmerica)

Post #: 12892

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 5:58:41 PM

Nikademus

Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline

I'm getting ahead of myself of course.......i'm negative by nature.....a trait inherited from the paternal side, but if i were a betting man....i wouldn't wager things repairing. When the xGFU says she feels "guilty" that tells me that she's already made up her mind and just doesn't have the courage to break it too me.

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Post #: 12893

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 6:01:18 PM

Mynok

Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok

I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but like warspite said, sometimes these things turn out for the better. When you have completed the grieving and transition process, you should consider a change of location. I know you've been struggling to find an IT job out there, whereas down here in the Triangle, we have quite a lot of them hanging about. Just something to consider when you are ready to.

I am ready to move now.....after I tracked down the last of my old friends and found out that he had also moved away, that was the sign for me. I've been living in xGFU's microworld for so long i've been out of touch. Only question is when......i don't have alot of fundage so may stick around with a mobile address for a bit and then head south.....Houston and Boston are two options i have. 20 years in Seattle is enough i guess. Losing the library and 'putors is hard but as one friend said....they are only material posessions.

Why are those the only two options? We have space for some books if you want to pack them up. It's not climate controlled but it's free.

You've got four feet on the ground to help here in NC already. I'm sure USS and I could take care of things to make your landing around here easier.

< Message edited by Mynok -- 2/9/2011 6:08:09 PM >

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

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Post #: 12894

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 6:09:43 PM

Nikademus

Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok

Why are those the only two options? We have space for some books if you want to pack them up. It's not climate controlled but it's free.

You've got four feet on the ground to help here in NC already.

They are the locations of two old friends. I'm not rich in that dept.....something xGFU pointed out when she dogpiled me with the alleged views of her friends....coworkers, and parents that i was an unfriendly son of a **** that she was tired of defending.

Appreciate the offer.....i'm just in a frame of mind right now where i just want to jump into the car now....like my friend who lives in Texas now did, and just go. My lib has admitedly gotten way too big in recent years. lol....with eReaders now becoming all that.....i suppose in the near future we'll all be "Picard"ing it from a desk council.

I already dumped a half dozen into the bin this morning. Those are the ones i've over-highlighted to death and aren't worth even 25 cents at a local bookstore.

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Post #: 12895

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 6:17:14 PM

Mynok

Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline

So you prefer old ones over new ones?

I'm just saying.....

Some free advice: think about it for a bit. This is a big change and it isn't good to make decisions in emotional stress. Let the waters subside a bit then decide where you want to go.

And we would be glad to help you settle in here in NC. Considering your training and certs, I believe you would find a good job pretty quickly.

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

(in reply to Nikademus)

Post #: 12896

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 6:17:21 PM

Grollub

Posts: 6674
Joined: 10/9/2005
From: Lulea, Sweden
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

we are seperated in all that matters, but not yet physically. She wants it, but so far has sat on the issue. I am at the point where I will take action as i told her that while decisions should not be hasty, she couldn't take too long to "decide" who she wants to be with. Initially, i was against the idea of seperation as i figured she would just hook up with Feed Boy faster, but now...after four days of living with a stranger, I need to get away from it. I've begun offloading all of my posessions.

No...i don't see a much of a chance for reconciliation. After all, as she explained to me, this wasn't 'really' about Feed Boy.......it was really about the fact that she has not been happy for a long time. Apparantly this is all my fault, and her friends all agree.....i am a piece of ****. Never mind that she is the one contemplating cheating or dumping me for the upgrade.

Been there :-/

I was dumped by an ex-GFU some 20+ years time ago when she had met some guy at her workplace. The sleazy details is that the guy she had met was already married & was known to have had plenty of mistresses the last years. This didn't bother my ex-GFU however, as he had promised he would get a divorce for her sake. Two years after we had split up, my ex-GFU came home to her home finding this manly paragon of virtue doing her (up to then) best friend in her own bed.

Funny thing, the (female) friend of the ex-GFU who told me that last bit, in the next sentence told me the split-up was my fault as I hadn't "appreciated her enough" ...

Women ...

_____________________________

�Not mastering metaphores is like cooking pasta when the train is delayed"

(in reply to Nikademus)

Post #: 12897

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 6:18:31 PM

USSAmerica

Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok

I know it doesn't feel like it right now, but like warspite said, sometimes these things turn out for the better. When you have completed the grieving and transition process, you should consider a change of location. I know you've been struggling to find an IT job out there, whereas down here in the Triangle, we have quite a lot of them hanging about. Just something to consider when you are ready to.

I am ready to move now.....after I tracked down the last of my old friends and found out that he had also moved away, that was the sign for me. I've been living in xGFU's microworld for so long i've been out of touch. Only question is when......i don't have alot of fundage so may stick around with a mobile address for a bit and then head south.....Houston and Boston are two options i have. 20 years in Seattle is enough i guess. Losing the library and 'putors is hard but as one friend said....they are only material posessions.

Why are those the only two options? We have space for some books if you want to pack them up. It's not climate controlled but it's free.

You've got four feet on the ground to help here in NC already. I'm sure USS and I could take care of things to make your landing around here easier.

The Martian speaks the truth, Nik! Count me in for anything I can do!

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me

Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Mynok)

Post #: 12898

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 6:22:50 PM

Mynok

Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline

quote:

"appreciated her enough"

Hoo boy...that old euphemism for "not worshipping the ground she walks on". Not that women should not be appreciated, of course, but that oftentimes seems to belie a rather overblown view of her self-worth.

< Message edited by Mynok -- 2/9/2011 6:24:18 PM >

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

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Post #: 12899

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/9/2011 6:23:00 PM

Nikademus

Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok

So you prefer old ones over new ones? I'm just saying.....

Some free advice: think about it for a bit. This is a big change and it isn't good to make decisions in emotional stress. Let the waters subside a bit then decide where you want to go.

And we would be glad to help you settle in here in NC. Considering your training and certs, I believe you would find a good job pretty quickly.

Thx...its nice to have options.

I was always an anti-packrat anyway. I hate clutter Some of the books i havn't opened in years. In a way it feels good to lighten the load. Some are just picture books...given the internet now, they are sort of redundant. I also realized that many of the books i've read (and overhighlighted and noted) will probably likewise, just sit forever on the shelf. Most warbooks don't make for good re-reads. A few are exceptions.

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Post #: 12900