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RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 2:45:44 PM

Terminus

Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

+1

Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

I don't think so. She's acting as if I RAPED her, for Thread's sake!

Guess that's the sort of risk one runs when one hugs women, and those women turn out to be neurotic. Oh well, lesson learned. At least this isn't America, where there'd be a sexual harassment lawsuit incoming...

No offense to my American brothers, but you do live in a somewhat litiguous country...

< Message edited by Terminus -- 2/19/2011 2:47:14 PM >

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to stuman)

Post #: 13681

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:04:24 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

Morning tithe.

Last weekend with the GFU for quite a bit.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13682

RE: Texas LOG! - 2/19/2011 3:12:08 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AW1Steve

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

I will be putting that to the test soon.

hopefully there will be cute single goth cowgirls aplenty.

Hmmmmm...... Goth cowgirls......I need to think about that for a bit....

I'd imagine you can find them in Austin.

It the goth cows I'd really beware of.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to AW1Steve)

Post #: 13683

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:13:39 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: AW1Steve

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: anarchyintheuk

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: bradfordkay

OT, Steve... is there a "belle" view in Nebraska?�

Not right now, all of the "view" is covered by snow and parkas.

(80 degrees and sunny here today)

There's something wrong about having your ac on in February.

No AC, glorious breeze with all the windows open.

I've been living in DC,Florida and Guam too long. That never occurred to me. Opening your windows is what you do when your AC (and power) goes out.

Not in DC, Florida or Guam. There you get stench, humidity and ball assed boonie cats respectively.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to AW1Steve)

Post #: 13684

RE: Texas LOG! - 2/19/2011 3:14:19 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: rtrapasso

or on the internet...

Thats not goth. Thats just sad.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to rtrapasso)

Post #: 13685

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:16:16 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bobogoboom

tithe

Hey Bobo!!!!!!

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to bobogoboom)

Post #: 13686

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:17:16 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: bobogoboom

and got a new gf unit

Until he find out youre posting rather revealing pics of her online.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to bobogoboom)

Post #: 13687

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:30:36 PM

USSAmerica

Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

Morning tithe... Well, I've recombobulated myself (as much as possible), and decided to stop punishing myself over this. If there's something to recover, it'll be up to her to start. One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

In other news, I've found a new favourite machine at my gym. It's a stomach cruncher, and over Thursday and Friday, I crunched as near as makes no difference 10,000 pounds. Hurts a bit, but it's working.

Oh, and welcome back Bobo!

Good man!

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me

Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13688

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:31:57 PM

USSAmerica

Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

+1

Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

I don't think so. She's acting as if I RAPED her, for Thread's sake!

Guess that's the sort of risk one runs when one hugs women, and those women turn out to be neurotic. Oh well, lesson learned. At least this isn't America, where there'd be a sexual harassment lawsuit incoming...

No offense to my American brothers, but you do live in a somewhat litiguous country...

Absolutely correct on all points.

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me

Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13689

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:32:40 PM

USSAmerica

Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

Morning tithe.

Last weekend with the GFU for quite a bit.

She traveling or something? Or are you?

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me

Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)

Post #: 13690

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:33:40 PM

USSAmerica

Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline

Good Saturday morning - Tithe.

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me

Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to USSAmerica)

Post #: 13691

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:35:03 PM

warspite1

Posts: 41353
Joined: 2/2/2008
From: England
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

+1

Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

I don't think so. She's acting as if I RAPED her, for Thread's sake!

Guess that's the sort of risk one runs when one hugs women, and those women turn out to be neurotic. Oh well, lesson learned. At least this isn't America, where there'd be a sexual harassment lawsuit incoming...

No offense to my American brothers, but you do live in a somewhat litiguous country...

Warspite1

Terminus, given your description of what happened, and considering your previous friendship, this woman's behaviour strikes me as being completely bizarre

...better off out of it.

_____________________________

England expects that every man will do his duty. Horatio Nelson October 1805

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13692

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:40:33 PM

Terminus

Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline

That's my take on it, too. Where's my cord-cutting scimitar?

Ah, there it is!

SWIPE!

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to warspite1)

Post #: 13693

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:44:22 PM

Terminus

Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

quote:

ORIGINAL: bobogoboom

and got a new gf unit

Until he find out youre posting rather revealing pics of her online.

And getting threads closed because of it.

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)

Post #: 13694

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:47:34 PM

Onime No Kyo

Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

Morning tithe.

Last weekend with the GFU for quite a bit.

She traveling or something? Or are you?

She is. I'm gonna catch up with her in late April. Thats a chunk of time.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to USSAmerica)

Post #: 13695

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 3:48:25 PM

Dixie

Posts: 10303
Joined: 3/10/2006
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: warspite1

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

+1

Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

I don't think so. She's acting as if I RAPED her, for Thread's sake!

Guess that's the sort of risk one runs when one hugs women, and those women turn out to be neurotic. Oh well, lesson learned. At least this isn't America, where there'd be a sexual harassment lawsuit incoming...

No offense to my American brothers, but you do live in a somewhat litiguous country...

Warspite1

Terminus, given your description of what happened, and considering your previous friendship, this woman's behaviour strikes me as being completely bizarre ...better off out of it.

I'd say so to, walk away from this one. Either she's actually crazy, in which case you're better off, or she's not the friend you thought she was.

_____________________________

Bigger boys stole my sig

(in reply to warspite1)

Post #: 13696

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:00:29 PM

Hortlund

Posts: 2884
Joined: 10/13/2000
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus
Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

What is the backstory here? How good friends were you? Did you talk or text outside work..etc?

The overreaction seems absurd, so I can only guess that she has a bit of guilty consious. Were she acting in a way that might have been "over the line" or in a grayzone when you have a relationship?

_____________________________

The era of procrastination, of half-measures, of soothing and baffling expedients, of delays, is coming to a close.
In its place we are entering a period of consequences..

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13697

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:23:48 PM

Chickenboy

Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

+1

Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

I don't think so. She's acting as if I RAPED her, for Thread's sake!

Guess that's the sort of risk one runs when one hugs women, and those women turn out to be neurotic. Oh well, lesson learned. At least this isn't America, where there'd be a sexual harassment lawsuit incoming...

No offense to my American brothers, but you do live in a somewhat litiguous country...

Absolutely correct on all points.

Yup. Amen. Consider this the PC shot across your manhood bow. Alright, maybe not the best euphamism, but you know what I'm saying.

Been here before on workplace opposite sex 'friends'. They want the best of both worlds: the attention of an asexual male friendship but they don't want to cut you the slack that you would have for non-workplace opposite sex friends of yours. They want that legal ("HARASSMENT!") backing when things don't go exactly to their liking with you in the workplace-either in their professional relationship or their workplace friendship. You can also be the scapegoat for their own very confused feelings about their own relationships.

Being in a female-dominated profession is particularly challenging. With rare exception, I find it best to treat them as formally as possible. No personal delving or secret sharing of any sort. Your marriage is boring? Is that so? Gee, that's very interesting-not. Can we grab lunch together? Only if there's others in the group and we talk business (separate checks too, please). Do you a favor beyond what's expected of a workplace relationship? Don't think so. Carpool with you and you alone? Foxtrot that noise, sister.

Anyways, good luck, T. Looks like you'll get off relatively easy here-it may not be a bad idea to disentangle yourself as fully as possible-certainly in your personal time as well as your work relationship.

_____________________________

(in reply to USSAmerica)

Post #: 13698

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:24:59 PM

Chickenboy

Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

Morning tithe.

Last weekend with the GFU for quite a bit.

She traveling or something? Or are you?

She is. I'm gonna catch up with her in late April. Thats a chunk of time.

Too bad, comrade red mouse. That leaves a whole lot of time on your hands for AE tho-donnit?

_____________________________

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)

Post #: 13699

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:27:02 PM

Terminus

Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Panzerjaeger Hortlund

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus
Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

What is the backstory here? How good friends were you? Did you talk or text outside work..etc?

The overreaction seems absurd, so I can only guess that she has a bit of guilty consious. Were she acting in a way that might have been "over the line" or in a grayzone when you have a relationship?

We were pretty close (or so I thought); did talk a fair bit outside of work. There was nothing out of the ordinary about what happened, it was a completely usual end-of-the-day hug, which we'd shared many times before, and which I (as I've admitted and apologized for) ballsed up.

I hope she has a long and happy life with her husband-to-be and all the kids she so badly wants, but the conditions she's set for me being allowed to be on the extreme periphery on that life are unacceptable. So I'm walking away.

At least we don't work in the same department at the hospital, so I don't actually HAVE to co-operate with her.

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to Hortlund)

Post #: 13700

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:28:40 PM

Chickenboy

Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

That's my take on it, too. Where's my cord-cutting scimitar?

Ah, there it is!

SWIPE!

Oops...looks like someone already got the memo.

_____________________________

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13701

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:34:22 PM

Terminus

Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline

You only have to hit me so many times over the head with the frying pan before I get the message...

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to Chickenboy)

Post #: 13702

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:38:42 PM

Terminus

Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline

Either way, thanks for listening, Brothers. Nice to have a place to vent.

Gonna go grab some dinner now.

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13703

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:45:12 PM

Dixie

Posts: 10303
Joined: 3/10/2006
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

You only have to hit me so many times over the head with the frying pan before I get the message...

Yes, but we want to hit you a few more times

_____________________________

Bigger boys stole my sig

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13704

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:52:39 PM

Hortlund

Posts: 2884
Joined: 10/13/2000
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus
it was a completely usual end-of-the-day hug, which we'd shared many times before,

Well, the thing is, there really isnt anything usual about hugging coworkers at the end of the day. That is why I think she is feeling guilty, that you two were "more than friends" but not across the line. That is also why I think she reacted like she did.

A quick show of hands in here. How many of you hug coworkers at the end of the day? How many hug coworkers that you have no interest in whatsoever? I met my fiancee at work, we were coworkers, and we spent an enormous amount of time talking to eachother each day...but we never ever hugged.

_____________________________

The era of procrastination, of half-measures, of soothing and baffling expedients, of delays, is coming to a close.
In its place we are entering a period of consequences..

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13705

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:55:52 PM

stuman

Posts: 3907
Joined: 9/14/2008
From: Elvis' Hometown
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

+1

Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

I don't think so. She's acting as if I RAPED her, for Thread's sake!

Guess that's the sort of risk one runs when one hugs women, and those women turn out to be neurotic. Oh well, lesson learned. At least this isn't America, where there'd be a sexual harassment lawsuit incoming...

No offense to my American brothers, but you do live in a somewhat litiguous country...

I must admit that even though I have many childhood female friends, no matter the fact that I have been married 27 years ( I think it is working out

) even though I have 2 daughters, even though most of my employees are females, I just don't think I really understand the gender very well.

Who kills a friendship over such a thing ? Oh well, what can one do ?

And unfortunately we do turn to litigation over here too often imo. There is a growing " mediation movement " that may slow the lawsuit train down some ( I hope ).

< Message edited by stuman -- 2/19/2011 4:57:24 PM >

_____________________________

" Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room. " President Muffley

(in reply to Terminus)

Post #: 13706

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:56:13 PM

sprior

Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

I don't hug Jeff, Mike, Tony or Clive at work or after.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.

(in reply to Hortlund)

Post #: 13707

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 4:56:50 PM

Dixie

Posts: 10303
Joined: 3/10/2006
From: UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Panzerjaeger Hortlund

A quick show of hands in here. How many of you hug coworkers at the end of the day? How many hug coworkers that you have no interest in whatsoever? I met my fiancee at work, we were coworkers, and we spent an enormous amount of time talking to eachother each day...but we never ever hugged.

Maybe not at the end of the day, but everyone needs a hug now and then when they're feeling down. But then again I'm probably not the best example of what's normal in a job

_____________________________

Bigger boys stole my sig

(in reply to Hortlund)

Post #: 13708

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 5:02:51 PM

stuman

Posts: 3907
Joined: 9/14/2008
From: Elvis' Hometown
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

I don't hug Jeff, Mike, Tony or Clive at work or after.

And I bet they are glad for that

_____________________________

" Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room. " President Muffley

(in reply to sprior)

Post #: 13709

RE: THE THREAD!!! - 2/19/2011 5:06:18 PM

stuman

Posts: 3907
Joined: 9/14/2008
From: Elvis' Hometown
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

quote:

ORIGINAL: stuman

quote:

One can only say "sorry" a finite amount of times, if there's no chance of nookie...

+1

Got a text from her today. She made it absolutely clear that our friendship is dead, but if I agree to never lay so much as a finger on her again, and never send her texts or emails, then we can commute together as colleagues.

I don't think so. She's acting as if I RAPED her, for Thread's sake!

Guess that's the sort of risk one runs when one hugs women, and those women turn out to be neurotic. Oh well, lesson learned. At least this isn't America, where there'd be a sexual harassment lawsuit incoming...

No offense to my American brothers, but you do live in a somewhat litiguous country...

Absolutely correct on all points.

Yup. Amen. Consider this the PC shot across your manhood bow. Alright, maybe not the best euphamism, but you know what I'm saying.

Been here before on workplace opposite sex 'friends'. They want the best of both worlds: the attention of an asexual male friendship but they don't want to cut you the slack that you would have for non-workplace opposite sex friends of yours. They want that legal ("HARASSMENT!") backing when things don't go exactly to their liking with you in the workplace-either in their professional relationship or their workplace friendship. You can also be the scapegoat for their own very confused feelings about their own relationships.

Being in a female-dominated profession is particularly challenging. With rare exception, I find it best to treat them as formally as possible. No personal delving or secret sharing of any sort. Your marriage is boring? Is that so? Gee, that's very interesting-not. Can we grab lunch together? Only if there's others in the group and we talk business (separate checks too, please). Do you a favor beyond what's expected of a workplace relationship? Don't think so. Carpool with you and you alone? Foxtrot that noise, sister.

Anyways, good luck, T. Looks like you'll get off relatively easy here-it may not be a bad idea to disentangle yourself as fully as possible-certainly in your personal time as well as your work relationship.