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RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 3:05:17 PM   
USSAmerica


Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Grollub

Dan was a single bloke living at home with his Dad and working in the family business.

When Dan found out that he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died,
he decided he needed to find a wife with whom to share his forthcoming fortune.

One evening, at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary bloke," he said to
her, "but in just a few years, my widower father will die and I will inherit $200 million."

Impressed, the woman asked for his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

Tag line; Women are so much better at financial planning than men.

And, related to women & money;





Hey, when did you take a picture of my wife in our driveway???

Very funny joke!

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me


Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Grollub)
Post #: 15301
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 3:05:45 PM   
USSAmerica


Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline 		Hot cars and hotter women UNP.  

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me


Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 15302
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 3:42:40 PM   
Onime No Kyo


Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline 		Mike, I'm concerned that your wife paints her toenails while propping her feet up on the hood of your car in your driveway. I think you may want to talk to her about this practice.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 15303
log! - 3/10/2011 3:57:33 PM   
Nikademus


Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline 		tithe.......

was up late last nite finishing up first draft of new scenario for AE. Thank god for the Military Channel and wine.



_____________________________


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Post #: 15304
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:05:46 PM   
USSAmerica


Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

Mike, I'm concerned that your wife paints her toenails while propping her feet up on the hood of your car in your driveway. I think you may want to talk to her about this practice.


What? You don't expect her to risk getting toenail polish on the leather seats do you?

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me


Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)
Post #: 15305
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:20:53 PM   
Kwik E Mart


Posts: 2447
Joined: 7/22/2004
Status: offline 		so i went to my GP yesterday with a bit of forboding...last time i was there, the ole blood pressure was high enough to scare a middle eastern dictator, so this time, i back my car into a tree while parking, because, well, my mind just isn't on the task at hand...after some choice curse words, i finally make it inside and the assistant takes my BP and it's quite normal...amazing...so...

no blood pressure meds tithe!!!

ps - anyone want to buy a slightly scratched 2002 jeep cherokee?

_____________________________

Kirk Lazarus: I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Ron Swanson: Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.

(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 15306
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:24:33 PM   
USSAmerica


Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline 		The scratch is a small price to pay for health.  

Good news, KEM! 


_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me


Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Kwik E Mart)
Post #: 15307
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:26:39 PM   
Kwik E Mart


Posts: 2447
Joined: 7/22/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

The scratch is a small price to pay for health.  

Good news, KEM! 



amen, brother!

_____________________________

Kirk Lazarus: I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Ron Swanson: Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.

(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 15308
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:28:58 PM   
Kwik E Mart


Posts: 2447
Joined: 7/22/2004
Status: offline 		so this is the time of the year when i usually get shark fever...they look like world beaters near the end of the season, then lay the largest turds imaginable in the playoffs...

_____________________________

Kirk Lazarus: I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Ron Swanson: Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.

(in reply to Kwik E Mart)
Post #: 15309
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:41:50 PM   
USSAmerica


Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline 		My Canes are just the opposite.  They will struggle to get into the playoffs, but if they do, they seem to always make a lot of noise.  

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me


Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Kwik E Mart)
Post #: 15310
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:46:12 PM   
Kwik E Mart


Posts: 2447
Joined: 7/22/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

My Canes are just the opposite.  They will struggle to get into the playoffs, but if they do, they seem to always make a lot of noise.  


yeah, i'd take 2010 packers over 2010 falcons anytime!

_____________________________

Kirk Lazarus: I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Ron Swanson: Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.

(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 15311
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 4:47:03 PM   
Kwik E Mart


Posts: 2447
Joined: 7/22/2004
Status: offline 		any Cake fans out there? going to see them at a small venue next week...

_____________________________

Kirk Lazarus: I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude!
Ron Swanson: Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.

(in reply to Kwik E Mart)
Post #: 15312
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 5:16:57 PM   
Onime No Kyo


Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Terminus

It wasn't your fault. It was Onime's fault.


"Fault" is such a relative term.....

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

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Post #: 15313
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 5:17:31 PM   
Onime No Kyo


Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Apollo11

Hi all,

Shame on you brother Onime on triple faber when we decent Europeans were sleeping and no other USA Thread brother was watching...






Leo "Apolo11"


What were the indecent Europeans doing?

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to Apollo11)
Post #: 15314
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 5:27:17 PM   
bradfordkay

 

Posts: 8683
Joined: 3/24/2002
From: Olympia, WA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

Mike, I'm concerned that your wife paints her toenails while propping her feet up on the hood of your car in your driveway. I think you may want to talk to her about this practice.



She's just making sure that the color of her nails matches the car!

_____________________________

fair winds,
Brad

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)
Post #: 15315
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 5:32:18 PM   
Onime No Kyo


Posts: 16842
Joined: 4/28/2004
Status: offline 		http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/2011/03/10/2011-03-10_sex_sells_in_christchurch_in_wake_of_new_zealand_earthquake.html

Interesting.

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to bradfordkay)
Post #: 15316
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 5:38:57 PM   
stuman


Posts: 3907
Joined: 9/14/2008
From: Elvis' Hometown
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Grollub

Dan was a single bloke living at home with his Dad and working in the family business.

When Dan found out that he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died,
he decided he needed to find a wife with whom to share his forthcoming fortune.

One evening, at an investment meeting, he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.
Her natural beauty took his breath away. "I may look like just an ordinary bloke," he said to
her, "but in just a few years, my widower father will die and I will inherit $200 million."

Impressed, the woman asked for his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

Tag line; Women are so much better at financial planning than men.

And, related to women & money;






Wow, lots of wisdom packed into that story and that picture.

And how dare she put her feet on that fine automobile !

I am very convinced that if you have that kind of car, it is easy to find that kind of eye candy to sit in the seat beside you. A corollary is that the easier it is to find the eye candy, the more vapid she usually is.

The girl in that picture is prtty, but I lust after the car

_____________________________

" Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room. " President Muffley


(in reply to Grollub)
Post #: 15317
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 5:42:19 PM   
stuman


Posts: 3907
Joined: 9/14/2008
From: Elvis' Hometown
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kwik E Mart


quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America

The scratch is a small price to pay for health.  

Good news, KEM! 



amen, brother!


+1

_____________________________

" Gentlemen, you can't fight in here! This is the War Room. " President Muffley


(in reply to Kwik E Mart)
Post #: 15318
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 6:06:19 PM   
Mynok


Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

http://www.nydailynews.com/news/world/2011/03/10/2011-03-10_sex_sells_in_christchurch_in_wake_of_new_zealand_earthquake.html

Interesting.


Title should have been Sharing Diseases Internationally......

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)
Post #: 15319
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 6:45:11 PM   
thegreatwent


Posts: 3011
Joined: 8/24/2004
From: Denver, CO
Status: offline
quote:

any Cake fans out there? going to see them at a small venue next week...


I enjoy the Cake albums I own. Been thinking about getting the new one but haven't gotten around to it. Enjoy the show.

Grats on the blood pressure, my doc just figured out the beta blockers don't work on me so I've got a new cocktail that seems to do the trick.

Tithe

_____________________________


(in reply to Mynok)
Post #: 15320
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 6:57:45 PM   
anarchyintheuk

 

Posts: 3921
Joined: 5/5/2004
From: Dallas
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Kwik E Mart

any Cake fans out there? going to see them at a small venue next week...


Great band. Not the most exciting live tho.

(in reply to Kwik E Mart)
Post #: 15321
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 7:54:08 PM   
Terminus


Posts: 41459
Joined: 4/23/2005
From: Denmark
Status: offline 		Started Dragon Age II. It's early days yet, but the story seems very complicated.

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 15322
log! - 3/10/2011 8:04:08 PM   
Nikademus


Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline 		havn't even gotten Dragon Age I yet. Then again i don't have my quad envy machine anymore.



_____________________________


(in reply to Terminus)
Post #: 15323
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 8:08:55 PM   
Apollo11


Posts: 24082
Joined: 6/7/2001
From: Zagreb, Croatia
Status: offline 		Hi all,

When is big move happening Nik? Any date set yet?


Leo "Apollo11"

_____________________________



Prior Preparation & Planning Prevents Pathetically Poor Performance!

A & B: WitW, WitE, WbtS, GGWaW, GGWaW2-AWD, HttR, CotA, BftB, CF
P: UV, WitP, WitP-AE

(in reply to Nikademus)
Post #: 15324
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 8:21:28 PM   
Nikademus


Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Apollo11

Hi all,

When is big move happening Nik? Any date set yet?


Leo "Apollo11"


probably next week. This week i am house sitting a big Great Dane and four cats. Nice to sleep in a bed again after 2.5 weeks of couches and chairs. It also gave me the opp to work on my scenario project in between chasing cats out of my laptop case....bookbag, open cubboards and washing machines.


_____________________________


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Post #: 15325
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 9:06:57 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		It always seems a bit more real when it's closer to home.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



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Post #: 15326
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 9:13:01 PM   
Dixie


Posts: 10303
Joined: 3/10/2006
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

It always seems a bit more real when it's closer to home.


You'd never have thought that Newark would be the target of an air raid.

_____________________________



Bigger boys stole my sig

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Post #: 15327
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 9:22:02 PM   
Grollub


Posts: 6674
Joined: 10/9/2005
From: Lulea, Sweden
Status: offline 		If you feel you would like to sleep on a mattress in the garage, you should show this clip to your wife/GFU/other.

http://www.evilchili.com/videos/5853/Women__Know_Your_Limits

< Message edited by Grollub -- 3/10/2011 9:23:05 PM >

_____________________________

“Not mastering metaphores is like cooking pasta when the train is delayed"

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Post #: 15328
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 9:26:20 PM   
Dixie


Posts: 10303
Joined: 3/10/2006
From: UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Grollub

If you feel you would like to sleep on a mattress in the garage, you should show this clip to your wife/GFU/other.

http://www.evilchili.com/videos/5853/Women__Know_Your_Limits


Show her? I quote it all the time.

_____________________________



Bigger boys stole my sig

(in reply to Grollub)
Post #: 15329
RE: THE THREAD!!! - 3/10/2011 9:27:15 PM   
Grollub


Posts: 6674
Joined: 10/9/2005
From: Lulea, Sweden
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dixie


quote:

ORIGINAL: Grollub

If you feel you would like to sleep on a mattress in the garage, you should show this clip to your wife/GFU/other.

http://www.evilchili.com/videos/5853/Women__Know_Your_Limits


Show her? I quote it all the time.


Right ...

_____________________________

“Not mastering metaphores is like cooking pasta when the train is delayed"

(in reply to Dixie)
Post #: 15330
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