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Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 3:45:39 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		************HQ, 21st USMC Rgt., Horn Is., August 16, 1942***********


An slightly built man in civilian clothing approaches the CO, he removes his borrowed helmet to reveal a bald dome which shines brightly in the August sunlight. A semicircle of rather long hair wraps partly around his head, sort of like the rings of Saturn.

His Majesty's Representative of the Council for the Humane Treatment of Prisoners: Colonel, allow me to introduce myself. I am Frank Longford, His Majesty's Representative of the Council for the Humane Treatment of Prisoners. I should like to inspect the Japanese prisoners please.

Lt. Col. Dallas, USMC: Mr. Longford, this is a United States Marine Corps operation. Nobody here voted for the King.

His Majesty's Representative of the Council for the Humane Treatment of Prisoners: Nevertheless, Horn Is. is Commonwealth territory, and is therefore in my purview. I'm afraid I shall have to insist that I view the prisoners, make sure they are well fed, have proper toiletries, medical care, that sort of thing.

Lt. Col. Dallas, USMC: <laughs> I am pretty sure they won't be needing medical care.

His Majesty's Representative of the Council for the Humane Treatment of Prisoners: Why not, Colonel?

Lt. Col. Dallas, USMC: Because they are dead, Mr. Longford.

His Majesty's Representative of the Council for the Humane Treatment of Prisoners: Dead? But what of the men of 65th Brigade? There were supposed to be some some 500 or so ashore here?

Lt. Col. Dallas, USMC: Dead, dead, dead, dead, dead! When the big guns of Idaho and Pennsylvania began bombarding the shore defences, they just ran out on the beach and danced around like Hotentots amid the incoming shot. Damndest thing I ever saw. We counted 404 of them and 13 extra arms and legs.

His Majesty's Representative of the Council for the Humane Treatment of Prisoners: Oh dear. Perhaps they were trying to surrender?

Lt. Col. Dallas, USMC: Well, then, they picked a damned inopportune place to do it. Hahahahahahaha. <several other Marines in the HQ begin laughing. After the laughter dies down the Col. continues> Mr. Longford, if you don't mind me asking, what the Hell happened to your hair?


The future Lord Longford later in life.









Attachment (1)

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 4/27/2011 3:51:39 PM >

(in reply to Alfred)
Post #: 4501
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 3:50:29 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline 		Ugh.  Hippie Redcoat royalty?  Around US Marines?  Who'll take odds against Lord Longford getting off that rock in one piece?  I'll lay 2:1 against.

_____________________________


(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4502
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 3:59:48 PM   
Mynok


Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
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There's a guy who will be cursing the lack of rum pretty shortly........

_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

(in reply to Chickenboy)
Post #: 4503
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 4:11:34 PM   
USSAmerica


Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok


There's a guy who will be cursing the lack of rum pretty shortly........




_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me


Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to Mynok)
Post #: 4504
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 4:34:50 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		I Got the Horn when I saw this:

Pre-Invasion action off Horn Island

Allied Ships
BB Idaho
BB Pennsylvania
AP Thomas Jefferson

Japanese ground losses:
404 casualties reported
Squads: 20 destroyed, 8 disabled
Non Combat: 5 destroyed, 3 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 1 (1 destroyed, 0 disabled)



BB Idaho firing at 65th Brigade
BB Pennsylvania firing at 65th Brigade
Defensive Guns fire at approaching troops in landing craft at 4,000 yards

That wasn't even a bombardment force, those BB's were just escorting the amphibious landing taffy. I think it does help to have seaplanes from the BB's observing shot.

It also appears that Horn Is. IS an atoll, because 21st Marine suffered from the lack of maps during the forced shock attack. Even so, there wasn't a single Jap left on the island so the place fell and all troops (including the engineers) were disembarked in one turn.

Ground combat at Horn Island (91,128)

Allied Shock attack

Attacking force 3072 troops, 94 guns, 45 vehicles, Assault Value = 69

Defending force 0 troops, 0 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 0

Allied adjusted assault: 5

Japanese adjusted defense: 1

Allied assault odds: 5 to 1 (fort level 0)

Allied forces CAPTURE Horn Island !!!

Combat modifiers
Attacker: shock(+)



Assaulting units:
21st Marine Rgt /1
2nd USN SeaBees /1
F Det USN Port Svc /1
1st USN SeaBees /1

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 4/27/2011 4:36:06 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4505
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 4:38:02 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		As for Lord Longford, he was a well-intentioned (but seriously misquided..yes..I know redundant) socialist who campaigned for prisoner's rights. Oddly, some found him erotic.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 4/27/2011 4:40:10 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4506
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 4:52:24 PM   
Alfred

 

Posts: 6685
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

It also appears that Horn Is. IS an atoll, because 21st Marine suffered from the lack of maps during the forced shock attack. Even so, there wasn't a single Jap left on the island so the place fell and all troops (including the engineers) were disembarked in one turn.


Sorry Cap Mandrake. My mistake in post #4409. I must have lifted my eyes off the table on page 294 of the manual as I typed and inadvertently returned them to Hoorn which is the entry immediately above Horn.

Alfred

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4507
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 5:19:25 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Alfred


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

It also appears that Horn Is. IS an atoll, because 21st Marine suffered from the lack of maps during the forced shock attack. Even so, there wasn't a single Jap left on the island so the place fell and all troops (including the engineers) were disembarked in one turn.


Sorry Cap Mandrake. My mistake in post #4409. I must have lifted my eyes off the table on page 294 of the manual as I typed and inadvertently returned them to Hoorn which is the entry immediately above Horn.

Alfred


Not to worry sir. As Chick Hearn, former Los Angeles Laker basketball announcer, was fond of saying when one of the Laker stars delivered a brutal check on an opposing player and was not called for a foul....."No harm, no foul"

(in reply to Alfred)
Post #: 4508
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 6:06:16 PM   
witpqs


Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline 		BTW, a shock attack upon landing is automatic for atolls of any size, and for islands of size 1 (6,000 capacity) or 2 (30,000 capacity) regardless of terrain.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4509
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/27/2011 11:13:40 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		More on Lord Longford...and the Pope


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RPcDREaxsu8

(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 4510
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/28/2011 5:45:31 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Attention readers: We are going to take a few days off due to our collective interest in the Royal wedding. Even the Shinto boys are excited.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4511
RE: Getting the Horn - 4/28/2011 3:45:55 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Check that. It seems that none of us got invites. Back to the war.

As to Admiral Lord sprior's question of why Horn Is., here is the scoop. Operation Drop Kick Me Jesus envisioned a landing on Russel Brand Is. to interdict communication to New Scotland, but when every Nettie in the South Pacific moved to Rabaul, I began to have second thoughts. It would have been bad for morale to slink back to Wellington, so I.......changed my mind.....that's it.

The BB's, fast transports and carriers will now move back toward Townsville, refuel and then move to Adelaide for employment in SOW. As Horn Is. airfield is operational, I moved in some P-40's which can cover the unloading of the smaller AK's at Horn. A group of PT's boats will provide security.

Shipping losses:

USN:

USS Swan (AVP) ...sunk

IJN:

I-5 (sunk in harbor at Noumea)
3 x AK (sunk in carrier raid Torres Strait)
Haruzake (DD) (sunk in carrier raid Torres Strait)
1 x CM

Air Losses:

Allied:

<10 aircraft all causes

IJA/IJN:

>40 aircraft

Strategic Consequences:

1) Japanese drawback from Tanna and Noumea permitting safer operations at Fiji.

2) Destruction of Port Moresby aerodrome and substantial damage to Madang

3) Capture of Horn Is. permitting safer passage through Torres Strait, much shorter strike range to Madang and possible exploitation to the NW.

4) Possible Japanese evacuation of Milne Bay.

5) Ummm...I'll get back to you


< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 4/28/2011 3:47:25 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4512
Office of Geological Intelligence - 4/29/2011 3:42:35 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		************SWPAC HQ, Brisbane, August 16, 1942**********


Gen MacArthur: ...right, next on the agenda is...geological briefing?

Col. Coreleone: Yes sir, if I may, this is Major Richter, Office of Geological Intelligence. He has a presentation of great importance.

Gen MacArthur: Office of Geological Intelligence? Never heard of it.

Maj. Richter: No sir, it's top secret. We like to say we are "rock solid", sir <giggles a bit>

Gen MacArthur: PRO-ceed, Major.

Maj. Richter: General, with the new photographic intel from the F-4's over New Guinea, we believe we have discovered a major Japanese geological warfare op. Slides please <a projector comes on>. Sir, these are maps of the Dutch New Guinea/Papua border from 1938. Please notice the two river systems...here...and....here <demonstrates with a pointer> NEXT SLIDE PLEASE. Now, here is the same area seen from an F4 Tuesday of last week.

Gen MacArthur: <puts on his glasses and approaches the screen> First slide again, Sargeant.......Now the second......Holy San Miguel! They mean to cut the island in two!

Maj. Richter: Precisely, Sir!

Gen MacArthur: For what purpose, then, a canal?

Maj. Richter: No sir, we believe they have a much more fiendish purpose. We belive they mean to break off Papua New Guinea and crash it into Australia!

Gen MacArthur: Wouldn't it just stay where it is?

Maj. Richter: No, sir, the gravitational forces are enormous. It will fall DOWN towards Australia. <moves to the map and demonstrates the relative positions of the two bodies>

Gen MacArthur: Oh, I see.........

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 4/29/2011 3:44:20 AM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4513
Geological Warfare Ops - 4/29/2011 4:44:56 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		..




Attachment (1)

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4514
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/29/2011 4:50:50 PM   
jeffk3510


Posts: 4132
Joined: 12/3/2007
From: Kansas
Status: offline

_____________________________

Life is tough. The sooner you realize that, the easier it will be.

Currently chasing three kids around the Midwest.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4515
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/29/2011 7:09:05 PM   
Smeulders

 

Posts: 1879
Joined: 8/9/2009
Status: offline 		M&M made quite a mint on engineering equipment. Now it's time to start producing that anti-grav equipment for the Allies.

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The AE-Wiki, help fill it out

(in reply to jeffk3510)
Post #: 4516
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/29/2011 7:37:02 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		ATTENTION! SPOILER ALERT!


quote:

ORIGINAL: Smeulders

M&M made quite a mint on engineering equipment. Now it's time to start producing that anti-grav equipment for the Allies.



(in reply to Smeulders)
Post #: 4517
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/29/2011 8:04:05 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		***************SWPAC HQ, Brisbane, August 17, 1942***********


Gen MacArthur: Major, I've been wanting to ask. About this Papua New Guinea crashing into Australia idea.

Maj. Richter: Yes, sir?

Gen MacArthur: What I don't get is why the whole island does just fall down now? Wouldn't the whole thing have to weigh more than just the Papua half the Japs are trying to saw off?

Maj. Richter: Hmmm. <looks at map for 20-30 seconds> I will have to get back to you on that, sir .


< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 4/29/2011 8:05:09 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4518
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/29/2011 11:00:07 PM   
Mynok


Posts: 12108
Joined: 11/30/2002
Status: offline
Silly Mac...doesn't he understand centrifugal force?


_____________________________

"Measure civilization by the ability of citizens to mock government with impunity" -- Unknown

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4519
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/30/2011 1:25:37 AM   
rtrapasso


Posts: 22653
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok


Silly Mac...doesn't he understand centrifugal force?







Attachment (1)

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Post #: 4520
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/30/2011 3:10:21 AM   
Moondawggie


Posts: 403
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From: Placer County CA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rtrapasso


quote:

ORIGINAL: Mynok


Silly Mac...doesn't he understand centrifugal force?









Uhhh---It seems to me that Major Richter has his 3D g-force and centripetal accelleration vectors confused:

1. Once Papua has been "sawn off" by the WJDs from the rest on New Guinea, gravitational attraction will pull it down into the sea, creating a Tsunami that will wash over all of NE Oz, effectively washing away all allied facilities in that hemi-continent. Papua won't "fall down" onto Oz, but the Wiley JDs will still accomplish their goal.

An excellent way to illustrate this concept to the General is to have Richter take the map off the wall, lay it on the edge of a table with Papua hanging over the edge, and then saw the map in half. It falls down, not into Townsville. Even field officers can often understand physical demonstrations of this nature.

2. Unfortunately, as rtpasso correctly points out, the WJDs probably haven't taken into account the dangers posed by centripetal acceleration acting on on freely mobile object sitting on the surface of a rotating sphere: When one breaks down the primary rotational vector into its component vectors, one discovers that the free objects are rapidly driven to the equator of the rotational mass, which in this case is northward to the equator.

Which means, of course, that instead of falling into the sea due to gravitational attraction, Papua instead may be flung towards the equator, smashing against Truk and subsequently Guam, until it stabilizes as a convieniently located landmass for holding "crossing the line ceremonies." Blowback is a bitch!

The inevitable outcome of such an occurrence would be to destroy 2 major IJA/IJN support bases, thereby saving the USMC from having to make some tough future landings on the road to Tokyo.

Ah, physics, and F=mg. It's not just a good idea, it's the law!





_____________________________

"The Yankees got all the smart ones, and look where it got them."

General George Pickett, the night before Gettysburg

(in reply to rtrapasso)
Post #: 4521
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/30/2011 3:20:23 AM   
Mynok


Posts: 12108
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Leave it to me to bring out the pathologists masquerading as physicists.


_____________________________

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(in reply to Moondawggie)
Post #: 4522
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/30/2011 2:08:55 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Notice in a physics cartoon there is more attention given to the centrifuge than there is the stick figures.

Also, what kind of retard evil genius designs a centrifuge with a horizontal axis of rotation?

(in reply to Mynok)
Post #: 4523
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/30/2011 2:40:23 PM   
rtrapasso


Posts: 22653
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Notice in a physics cartoon there is more attention given to the centrifuge than there is the stick figures.

Also, what kind of retard evil genius designs a centrifuge with a horizontal axis of rotation?

One that wants to make it easy to draw??

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4524
How I Would Defend The Philippines - 4/30/2011 2:56:36 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		************M&M Enterprises South Pacific HQ, Suva, Fiji, August 17, 1942*********

Man in fine linen slacks: <on telephone with imported Italian loafers* up on desk> ...look, that is what I am paying you for Richter. I don't care if he says he graduated first in his class at Westpoint. I am here to tell you it was either a weak year or he knew somebody. I have a copy of his senior thesis. Let me just say the man is no genius.

.....


Negative! DO NOT say anything about Corregidor. You are trying to align his incentives with yours not make an enemy of him. I thought you told me you had sales experience?

.....

Floor wax? Are you kidding me? My chief geologist is a floor wax salesman? <cups phone with hand and calls to other side of the room> Yossarian, you ethnic SOB, what is that expression you use?

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: Santa Maria!

Man in fine linen slacks: Yeah that's it! <uncovers phone> Santa Maria, Richter! Santa Maria! <he pronounces "Santa" like the guy in the red suit> Do you know what that means, Richter?

......


Yeah, well, in my book it means why did I hire you if you can't close the deal on a guy with an ego the size of New Guinea. Butter him up.

.....

No, not his wife, you moron, his military genius <makes air quotes> That's what he wants to hear. Tell him if Papua breaks off it could ruin his career.

.....

Hell, I don't know. Use geology terms. Bluff. Tell him Papua New Guinea is sitting on big deposit of schist.

.....

No SCHIST! Where the Hell did you go to geology school, Richter? Tell him Papua sits on schist and Western New Guinea sits on granite. Believe me, with his ego, he won't ask any more questions.

.....

OK. Get it done. I am already in big for the cement ordnance. We need to move this stuff. OK, you can do it son. I have confidence in you. Talk to you Tuesday. <hangs up phone>

I don't trust that kid to tie his own shoes.

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: But you just said you had confidence in him.

Man in fine linen slacks: Yossarian, you naive SOB, I was trying to motivate him.

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: But you don't really believe what you told him?

Man in fine linen slacks: Santa Maria, man! What good would it do to tell him I think he is an idiot?

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: Do you do that to me?

Man in fine linen slacks: Do what?

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: Butter me up like that?

Man in fine linen slacks: Yossarian, you crazy, insecure SOB, when is the last time I had something good to say about you?

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: Hmmmmm...<looks up at the ceiling>...I can't say I remember any.

Man in fine linen slacks: See, there you have it. You sound like a woman. Grow a pair, would you. <throws a folder across the desk> Here, look at this.

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: <picks it up> "How I Would Save the Philippines by Douglas A. MacArthur". It is all about him even then.

Man in fine linen slacks: Get this. His plan involved 400 B-10B and 300 P-26. I could have made a fortune if the Army adopted his plan. What an idiot.

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: Everyone thought his clone was a dim bulb but I liked the guy.

Man in fine linen slacks: What was that, Yossarian?

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: Oh, never mind.

Man in fine linen slacks: What I don't get is how somebody like that rises to that level of command.

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: Chutzpah

Man in fine linen slacks: Chutzpah? Yossarian, you crazy, secretive SOB, I didn't know you spoke Yiddish?

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: I worked in the Catskills one summer in college.

Man in fine linen slacks: No kidding? Stand up?

Hiruste man drinking a frozen libation: No, bussing tables.......


* 99% of authentic Italian loafers in Fiji in 1942 were imported so this is largely redundant.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 4/30/2011 3:04:06 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4525
RE: Geological Warfare Ops - 4/30/2011 5:36:13 PM   
BrucePowers


Posts: 12094
Joined: 7/3/2004
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Notice in a physics cartoon there is more attention given to the centrifuge than there is the stick figures.



That's because it is a science cartoon not an art cartoon. What do you think this is, Calvin and Hobes?

You guys should watch the Big Bang Theory more often

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4526
RE: How I Would Defend The Philippines - 4/30/2011 5:42:37 PM   
rtrapasso


Posts: 22653
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quote:


* 99% of authentic Italian loafers in Fiji in 1942 were imported so this is largely redundant.


Wouldn't 100% of authentic Italian loafers in Fiji be imported??

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 4527
RE: How I Would Defend The Philippines - 4/30/2011 9:51:16 PM   
USSAmerica


Posts: 18715
Joined: 10/28/2002
From: Graham, NC, USA
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: rtrapasso

quote:


* 99% of authentic Italian loafers in Fiji in 1942 were imported so this is largely redundant.


Wouldn't 100% of authentic Italian loafers in Fiji be imported??


Maybe 1% were not "imported" but were "smuggled" in?

_____________________________

Mike

"Good times will set you free" - Jimmy Buffett

"They need more rum punch" - Me


Artwork by The Amazing Dixie

(in reply to rtrapasso)
Post #: 4528
RE: How I Would Defend The Philippines - 4/30/2011 10:07:18 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		Why are Italians loafing in Fiji? Shouldn't they be doing something constructive like building anti-submarine barriers, er I mean causeways?






Attachment (1)

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 4529
RE: How I Would Defend The Philippines - 4/30/2011 10:08:37 PM   
rtrapasso


Posts: 22653
Joined: 9/3/2002
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quote:

ORIGINAL: USS America


quote:

ORIGINAL: rtrapasso

quote:


* 99% of authentic Italian loafers in Fiji in 1942 were imported so this is largely redundant.


Wouldn't 100% of authentic Italian loafers in Fiji be imported??


Maybe 1% were not "imported" but were "smuggled" in?

A different kind of importation, yet still imported...

(in reply to USSAmerica)
Post #: 4530
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