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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

 
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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/13/2014 12:29:54 AM   
Cap Mandrake


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***********Beachside Virra, Truk, Dec 15, 1941(d)************


Honorary Admirahr Mandrake-san Johnny "Too Tarh", it seem to you that days take waaaaay, waaaaay too rong in Truk? Seem rike I have 8 bowrs of fish-head soup since rast time anything brow up. <rooks and shortwave radio messages>

ROOK AT THIS! THREE MESSAGES FROM ARUMNI ASSOCIATION. THIS-AH ONE SAY TIME TO GET OIR CHANGED ON NAGATO. THIS ONE-AH SAY MEET SHINTO SINGERS IN AREA! HORY CRAP! We nevah get any work done at this rate. Turn off crap! Throw away message unress something brow up!

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/13/2014 1:35:14 AM >

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/13/2014 8:26:59 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Operation Connie Ringus going pretty good. 51st Navarh Guard attack New Zearand-mens at Nadi tomorrow.
perhaps Hiei support randing at Pago Pago. Japan-mens not decide yet.




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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/14/2014 7:20:09 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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************Pranning************

Operation Conne Ringus: Just notice on mouseover inter that Arried task force South of Vava'u attacked yesterday is berieved by Jake pirot to be 2 CV's and 8 TK's Japan-mens admirahrs not-ah berieve this because airpranes attack AK's formerry from Brisbane in same rocation. Japan-mens not-ah waste any more torpedoes on rousy AK's, especiarry when empty going East.

52nd Navarh Guard redirected to take Norfork Isrand as Nadi will have 2 Navarh Guard units and 144th Regiment within 2-3 d. That-ah enough to defeat New Zerand-mens who not-ah exactarry highry enthusiastic even though Fiji is pretty good duty compared to North Africa is you ask Mandrake-san.

Ambon: Randing force may reach Ambon tonight covered by Zuiho and Ryujo and cruiser.

Manado: Rousy S-boat at Manado sink another AK and damage one more. Japan-mens get ships out of there. Garrison-mens can eat cocconuts.

Cagayan: Extra mens at Cagayan capture base. That-ah pretty big speed bump wasting Japan-mens time.

Maraysia: Japan-mens arrive at Johore Bahru. Austrarian-mens run away.

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 1:49:05 AM   
Chickenboy


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Ah! Most honorable Captain-san. A word, prease? It is forbidden to sprit carriers into small packets for the Japan men's navy. This-ah big probrem.

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 2:28:46 AM   
witpqs


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Perhaps for ordinary Japan men's navy, but Cap commands Japan mega mens's navy!

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 1:51:35 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

Ah! Most honorable Captain-san. A word, prease? It is forbidden to sprit carriers into small packets for the Japan men's navy. This-ah big probrem.


Hai! That-ah good question but-ah history show it onry bad idea if nothing bad hahppen.


Considah Generarh-san Bobby Ree at Chancerorsvirre, he reave rike Ryujo and Hosho at Fredericksburg and then he take rest of carriers to
Chancerorsvirre and even though Union-mens have more carriers Union-mens not expect it and Union-mens rike..."Hory Crap!"...and...Mistah Rincahn-san is rike.."Hory crap, where can find Generarh-san with 46 chromosomes?"

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 1:58:21 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Othah points:

1) Spriting carriers necessary to achieve current operationarh tempo.

2) America-mens carriahs difficurt to unite and get arr 3 in South Pacific by Dec 18

3) 2 America-mens carriahs in area wandering around rike Hare-Krishna peopurhs begging for gasorine.

4) America-mens carriers stirr have crappy Brewsters and crappy TBD's

4) Japapn-mens carriahs reunite in about 2 d in South Pacific and even by tomorrow aburh to operate jointry.

5) Japan-mens WANT America-mens carriahs to fight when-ah have rearry crappy pranes. The Japan-mens run arr ovah prace rike Rord of Fries.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/15/2014 3:11:35 PM >

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 2:19:19 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Mandrake-san get in big fight with Musrim-mens and womans in United Kingdom on Facebook. Mandrake-san win argument
so Musrim-woman carr Mandrake-san "Grinning Ape" and something carred "turd". Mandrake-san not know what "turd" is but "grinning ape" bit
probabry mean Musrim-woman think Mandrake-san have srave brood bacause hair curry.

Two of Mandrake-san's sisters carr me up on terephone raughing but terr me to coor it before end up rike Sahrman Rushdie.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/15/2014 3:24:45 PM >

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 2:38:52 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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At this point, the benefits of pronouns and articles in the Engrish language can scarcely be debated.


Sure, it's hard for a 2 and 3 year old...the subject..object....possessive..there must be more too but I can't remember...reflexive maybe...but once you get it down it really saves time.

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 2:43:07 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Is Thracian a DM in stock AE?

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 2:46:00 PM   
HansBolter


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Is Thracian a DM in stock AE?


I'm pretty sure its a DD in stock.

I usually convert it back to a DD straight away in Babes since the Brits are short on them at start.

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Hans


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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 5:12:18 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: HansBolter


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Is Thracian a DM in stock AE?


I'm pretty sure its a DD in stock.

I usually convert it back to a DD straight away in Babes since the Brits are short on them at start.


Hai, that is my recorrection too. Thracian now converted to artificiarh reef.

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 5:17:38 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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***********Admiral's Quarters, Akagi, Etoforu Bay, Nov. 22, 19419d)***********


Admiral Yamamoto: <signs document, hands to aide> Operation Beowolf is approved.

Aide: HAI! Operation Beoworf approved. <bows head> What-ah about operation for retter "r"?

Admiral Yamamoto: <rubs temples> Let's wait on that. We shouldn't be too ambitious...and Captain..I do NOT want that man harmed in any way. He is a personal friend. Is that understood?

Aide: HAI!!

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/15/2014 6:18:20 PM >

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/15/2014 5:40:17 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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**************Residence of the Dean of the English Department, Harvard, Boston, Dec 6, 1941(d)************


<there is a knock on the door..a distinguished looking gentleman approaches>

Professor Higgenbottom: Yes, who is it?

Voice: Derivery, Chinese raundry, professor!

Professor Higgenbottom: <begins opening door> I hope you have not overstrached my shirts again. I do so hate that.....<pauses when he sees the two "deliverymen">....say...are you sure you young men are Chinese? You seem to have long torsos but short legs and are somewhat thickly set? <a forceful arm grabs him quickly around the neck and brings a chloroform soaked cloth to hsi face.....then...sleepy time>

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/16/2014 4:24:01 PM   
Chickenboy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
The Japan-mens run arr ovah prace rike Rord of Fries.


Rord of the Fries?

That-ah rook rearry good!






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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/19/2014 4:44:29 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Probabry sun spots or jamming by Arries but now Japan-mens have communication again. Now Japan-mens can start taking ovah worrd again.

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/19/2014 5:50:00 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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***Proposal for alternative funding of major league baseball salaries****

So I go to the Angles game Friday night and using my super-secret discount code I was blessed to spend only $40 per seat for tickets They were pretty good seats, Field level about 15 rows back behind first base, but still...$40?? Then $10 parking, $5 hot dogs, $9 for a crappy Bud Light..pretty soon you are talking about some money.

The way I figure it, the seats would be like $25 if they hadn't agreed to pay Albert Pujols $40 million. Nobody asked me if that was a good idea so I don't think it's fair I should pay for it.

Here is the idea. You reduce his contract to $10 million (plus dental and vision coverage and the copper plan on Obamacare), the seat price falls to $25 and then.....if the guy actually gets a hit, you send the bat boy around with a big Angles hat and the fan throw some money in. As Milo would say..."that is the proper alignment of incentives"

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/19/2014 7:39:30 PM >

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/19/2014 7:20:47 PM   
Chickenboy


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As a lifelong Oakland A's fan, can I say how pleased I am that the "Angles" gave Pujols a bajillion dollars? That's good stuff there, guys!

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/19/2014 7:29:00 PM   
T Rav

 

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Doesn't help CB. Been a Rays fan for a long time, but even though the payroll is low, the seat prices are high... Go figure.

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/19/2014 7:51:06 PM   
poodlebrain

 

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I've been an A's fan from the moment Charlie Finley moved them to Oakland. I had season tickets row 6 behind home plate from 1989 through 1994. Not so sadly, I haven't spent a penny on major league baseball since the strike/lockout caused the World Series to be cancelled. I miss the days of Gene Autry owning the California Angels.

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Gehrig-san - 5/19/2014 8:46:09 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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..




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RE: Gehrig-san - 5/19/2014 9:10:37 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Ever wonder what I-24 was doing off Washington?

********Deck of I-24, 02:20, Dec 9, 1941(d), 300 yds offshore deserted beach, Olympic Peninsula*******


<small boat pulls alongside>

Professor Higgenbottom: Now look here! I am quite certain this Chinese laundry business is a fraud. If you Asiatics don't tell me what is going on I shall contact my lawyer. I'm quite an important man, you know.

Captain of I-24: Wercome aboard Professor Higgenbottom-san. You honored guest.

Professor Higgenbottom: Look, if this is about the budget cuts in Foreign Languages I had NOTHING to do with that!

Captain of I-24: No, Professor-san. This-ah about Engrish. Arr about Engrish.......

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/19/2014 10:11:37 PM >

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RE: Gehrig-san - 5/19/2014 9:29:37 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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***********Aboard I-24, 800nm west of Seattle, Dec 11, 1941(d)*********


Japan-mens navarh interrigence guy: Rook, Professor, Japan-mens..<looks at list>...WE make-ah this easy on.......<looks at list>...HE if you give Japan-mens...ahhh............<looks at list>...WE...rist of refrexive pronouns.

Professor Higgenbottom: Look, Lt. Sato, the latter two instances are object pronounds and it's pronounced "REFLEXIVE" with an "L". Besides, I'm not doing anything unitl you bring me something other than this damnable fishead soup.

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RE: Gehrig-san - 5/20/2014 2:02:49 AM   
Xargun

 

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

***********Aboard I-24, 800nm west of Seattle, Dec 11, 1941(d)*********


Japan-mens navarh interrigence guy: Rook, Professor, Japan-mens..<looks at list>...WE make-ah this easy on.......<looks at list>...HE if you give Japan-mens...ahhh............<looks at list>...WE...rist of refrexive pronouns.

Professor Higgenbottom: Look, Lt. Sato, the latter two instances are object pronounds and it's pronounced "REFLEXIVE" with an "L". Besides, I'm not doing anything unitl you bring me something other than this damnable fishead soup.


Watching intensively while eating popcorn.. Can't wait for that Afflek fella to sneak into the sub and save the Professor...


< Message edited by Xargun -- 5/20/2014 3:03:20 AM >

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RE: Gehrig-san - 5/20/2014 12:05:17 PM   
alaviner


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Xargun

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

***********Aboard I-24, 800nm west of Seattle, Dec 11, 1941(d)*********


Japan-mens navarh interrigence guy: Rook, Professor, Japan-mens..<looks at list>...WE make-ah this easy on.......<looks at list>...HE if you give Japan-mens...ahhh............<looks at list>...WE...rist of refrexive pronouns.

Professor Higgenbottom: Look, Lt. Sato, the latter two instances are object pronounds and it's pronounced "REFLEXIVE" with an "L". Besides, I'm not doing anything unitl you bring me something other than this damnable fishead soup.


Watching intensively while eating popcorn.. Can't wait for that Afflek fella to sneak into the sub and save the Professor...


He will be coming in the Bat Sub.
Possibly Magnum can save Mr. Higgins/Higginbottom when they pass near Hawaii.

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RE: Gehrig-san - 5/20/2014 2:01:22 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: NCSUforest
He will be coming in the Bat Sub.


Sorry, I just don't see that as logistically possible unless I-24 detours to Gotham Harbor. I don't think the Bat Sub has the range for a
mid-ocean intercept (even BS mark II or IIILR). Also, I always had he notion that Gotham City was in the NE somewhere.






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< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/20/2014 3:03:56 PM >

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/20/2014 3:33:41 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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*********Timetable for Operation Connie Ringus***********

Noumea: III/66th Navarh Guard rands tonight without any navarh escort. III/66th what Japan-mes carr "fungiburh". Aviation support in about 5d then Mavissess move from Rabaurh.

Nadi: 51st Navarh Guard ashore in good order..attack tonight. 53rd arrive 2d. 52nd in 3d and 144th Regt in about 6d then everyone march on Suva.

Pago Pago Maizuru 1st SNRF in 2d after navarh bombardment.

Canton: I&II/66th in about 4d.

Port Moresby: 4th Div and 2nd Ronson Regiment in about 6-7d. 3 BB's at Rabaurh wirr support this as well as carriers and 4 CA SCTF. Port Moresby is big prize so Arried-mens might come out and fight.

Norfork Isrand: 6-7d and AV to support seapranes.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/20/2014 4:37:03 PM >

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/20/2014 3:39:47 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Japan-mens predict when Arried-mens get panicked radio carr from Angrican priest or Postmaster Generarh on Norfork Isrand they rike..."Hory crap! New Zearand next!"

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/20/2014 3:45:12 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Before Japan-mens rand at Rord Howe need to get whore rot of crap ready because have to buird airbase quickry before Arried-mens get ovah pucker factor and attack.

Japan-mens need:

1) Rot of Korea-mens in diapers to buird airstrip

2) Mines

3) Some kind of shore guns

4) Submarines...rots

5) Carrier raid on Sydney

6) SCTF...maybe three because they have to go back to Rabaurh to rearm.

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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 5/20/2014 3:48:09 PM   
BBfanboy


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Japan-mens predict when Arried-mens get panicked radio carr from Angrican priest or Postmaster Generarh on Norfork Isrand they rike..."Hory crap! New Zearand next!"

Will Japan-men have terrier TFs to catch rats freeing NZ?

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No matter how bad a situation is, you can always make it worse. - Chris Hadfield : An Astronaut's Guide To Life On Earth

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