rlc27
Posts: 306
Joined: 7/21/2001 From: Connecticut, USA Status: offline
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December 8, 1941 The last two days had seen a flurry of activity throughout the nation: in Washington, where admirals and generals alike slapped each other on the back and said what a great day it had been, and Pearl Habor, Oahu, where the US Pacific Fleet had just completed the first phase of the Congressionally-approved Fleet Renewal Program, with a little help from the Japanese. "I am pleased to report to the President, the Congress, and the American People that the first phase of our aggressive fleet renewal program has been an utter and complete success," intoned Congressman (R-New York) Arthur "Arty" Gotterdammerung, to scattered applause in the mostly empty room. "We haven't seen this kind of subcommittee commitment since Lee threatened to cross the Potomac." At the press conference after, a reporter for WABC shoved a microphone in Gotterdammerung's face: "What would you say to the American people who say the Japs have gotten overzealous in helping us carry out this innovative program, and that the magazine explosion and consequent sinking of USS Nevada, and the multiple hits on many other capital ships weren't, to quote Sentaor Palantine, 'on purpose?' What about those folks who are saying this is only the beginning, and that the Japanese have already invaded the Phillipines?" "Well, Jim, all I've got to say to that question is that it addresses a rumor I've had the misfortune of hearing even at the highest levels. The situation is certainly under control and well within what we forecasted twelve months ago. All we owe the Japs right now is a big "thank you" for helping us out with our program, but it's only prudent to watch the devious little fellows, if only for their own good. However, the yellow man only has so many torpedoes, bombs, planes, and pilots, and if the reports coming in from all over the Pacific are any approximation, they'll be out of them soon, so there's not much of a chance that they will bite off more than they can chew. Plus MacArthur's B-17's parked out at Clark field, in an orderly fashion and wingtip to wingtip, could handle any kind of invasion fleet from 15,000 feet. Especially with their new paint scheme." Anothe reporter, Hale Mead from WJAL, pushed to the front. "What about reports we're getting of this miraculous new Jap fighter, that's a hundred feet long and shoots fireballs from its exhaust?" "As far as we know, the Nips have copied everything they have from us, the Tommies, the Frogs, Krauts, Guineas, Limeys, and Bolsheviks, and, to answer your question, no that's not true, their planes are biplanes with fixed landing gear...am I forgetting anyone? Any more questions?" "Any plans to make the Japs stop?" asked a diminutive, weasel-faced reporter in the back. "Well, I can certainly answer that question, Ralph. The answer to that question is that we don't need to, not yet. As anthropologists have known for years, the lower races lack any sort of resolve, and, being closer to the ape, they quickly lose their focus. It was a miracle they could even pull themselves together to help us at Pearl! We expect to let things run on for a bit, but by May we'll be in Yokohama Bay, onboard our huge and shiny new fleet of Alaska-class battlecruisers, toasting life, women, and the Emperor with the cute little buggers." ---- That night, at home with his wife and a small gathering of brass, Gotterdammerung quietly toasted his signed portrait of Admiral Yamamoto, given to him by the man himself when they met at Harvard, decades ago. "This drink's for you, old buddy. I owe you one, now. To the Capes and Scrolls of Old Cantabridge! The sign and the seal in harmonia perpetuum! To the coming Age of Reason!" He raised and drained his glass.
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< Message edited by rlc27 -- 11/9/2004 12:23:56 PM >
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"They couldn't hit an elephant from this dist--" --John Sedgwick, failing to reduce suppression during the Battle of the Wilderness, U.S. Civil War.
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