"If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it."

"If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Current Games From Matrix.] >> [World War II] >> War In The Pacific - Struggle Against Japan 1941 - 1945

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Ron Saueracker -> "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/4/2006 9:52:59 PM)
and other gems... Military Truisms • Aim towards the Enemy --instruction printed on US rocket launcher. • Cluster bombing is very, very accurate. The bombs always hit the ground. • Whoever said the pen is mightier than the sword obviously never encountered automatic weapons. • Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't ever volunteer to do anything. • If your attack is going too well, you are walking into an ambush. • If you find yourself in a fair fight, you didn't plan your mission properly. • Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you. • No combat ready unit has ever passed inspection. • Any ship can be a minesweeper . . . . once. • If the enemy is in range, so are you. • Tracers work both ways. • Friendly fire isn't. • Five second fuses only last three seconds. • Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than you are. • The problem with taking the easy way out is that the enemy has already mined it. • Incoming fire has the right of way. • Clothing stores have only two sizes: too large and too small. • If you can see the enemy, he can see you. • And never tell your Boss you have nothing to do.

Ron Saueracker -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/4/2006 10:11:07 PM)
Some good natured anti grunt stuff... -Why walk when you can drive? -Role of the Infantry...to catch artillery rounds.

mc3744 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/4/2006 10:41:45 PM)
[:D][:D][:D]

Ron Saueracker -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/4/2006 10:58:27 PM)
Anyone remember any from their service?

JJB647 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/4/2006 11:55:56 PM)
The 5 most dangerous things in the navy are.... A Seaman saying, "I learned this in Boot Camp..." A Petty Officer saying, "Trust me, sir..." A Lieutenant JG saying, "Based on my experience..." A Lieutenant saying, "I was just thinking..." A Chief chuckling, "Watch this s***..."

Rob Brennan UK -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 12:05:01 AM)
[:D][:D][:D]

ny59giants -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 12:06:11 AM)
N - Never A - Again V - Volunteer Y - Yourself [:D][:D] The Marines are looking for a FEW good men....and their still looking.[:D][:D] U.S.Navy 1976 -1983 as an Electronics Technician

Dixie -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 12:16:24 AM)
This made me chuckle the other day at work. The definition of RAF ranks [:D][:D][:D] AN AIR OFFICER. Leaps tall buildings in a single bound, Is more powerful than a locomotive, Is faster than a speeding bullet, Walks on water, gives policy to GOD. A Group Captain Leaps short buildings in a single bound, Is more powerful than a bulldozer, Is just as fast as a speeding bullet, Walks on water if the sea is calm, A WING COMMANDER. Leaps short buildings with a running start and favourable wind, Is almost as powerful as a bulldozer, Is faster than a speeding .22 slug, Walks on water in an indoor swimming pool, Talks with GOD if special request is approved. A SQUADRON LEADER. Barely clears Nissen Huts, Loses tug-of-war with a locomotive, Can fire a speeding bullet, Swims well, Is occasionally addressed by GOD. A FLIGHT LIEUTENANT. Makes high scratch marks when trying to leap short buildings, Is run over by locomotives, Can sometimes handle a gun without inflicting self-injury, Dog paddles, Talks to animals. A FLYING OFFICER. Runs into buildings, Recognises a locomotive two out of three times, Has a gun but is not issued with ammunition, Can stay afloat with proper instruction, Talks to walls. A PILOT OFFICER. Falls over doorstep when trying to enter buildings, Says “Look at the Choo Choo”, Is not issued with a gun, Plays in mud puddles, Mumbles to himself. A NON COMMISSIONED OFFICER. Lifts buildings and walks under them, Kicks locomotives off the track, Catches speeding bullets between teeth and eats them, Freezes water with a single glance, He is GOD. AN AIRMAN. Sweeps under buildings, Puts locomotive back on track, Picks up spent cartridges after speeding bullets have been fired, Carries the water to be frozen, He is the Son of GOD.

Ron Saueracker -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 12:20:13 AM)
Some of this stuff is ageless!

scott64 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 1:44:06 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Ron Saueracker and other gems... Military Truisms • Any ship can be a minesweeper . . . . once. Hey thats my line [:'(] [sm=00000028.gif][sm=00001746.gif][sm=Crazy-1271.gif]

Graycompany -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 2:53:12 AM)
the 7'P's Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss Poor Performance

Graycompany -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 2:53:56 AM)
ohh, and never get involved in a land war in Asia.

Onime No Kyo -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 3:21:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Graycompany ohh, and never get involved in a land war in Asia. Sun Tzu, right? [;)]

Onime No Kyo -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 3:22:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Dixie This made me chuckle the other day at work. The definition of RAF ranks [:D][:D][:D] Hey....you Brits stole that from us! [:-]

niceguy2005 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 3:23:34 AM)
Very good Dixie. [:D] Seems like I've seena US version before.

Onime No Kyo -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 3:28:45 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: ny59giants N - Never A - Again V - Volunteer Y - Yourself [:D][:D] The Marines are looking for a FEW good men....and their still looking.[:D][:D] U.S.Navy 1976 -1983 as an Electronics Technician Uncle Sam's Misguided Children My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment A good one from days way before mine.... Stupid Troopers Running Around [in] Circles If it crunches, its infantry. If it shoots back its a tank. (I think I may have forgotten a line...oh well) And my personal favorite.... If you aint Cav...you aint s***!

Onime No Kyo -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 3:31:42 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: niceguy2005 Very good Dixie. [:D] Seems like I've seena US version before. Yeah, there was a US version. I forget how it went but there was one part about how 2nd Lts can hurt themselves with a water pistol and how a SSgt's farts shake the heavens.

ChezDaJez -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 3:38:50 AM)
Never piss from the pointy end while underweigh... There are old pilots and there are bold pilots... but there are no old, bold pilots. This plane has more downing gripes than the USS Arizona... A good landing is any you walk away from. If altitude and airspeed = 0, you've either landed or crashed. Sometimes its hard to tell the difference. The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good crap. A night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities to experience all three at the same time. Things which do you no good in aviation: Altitude above you. Runway behind you. Fuel in the truck. A navigator. Half a second ago. Approach plates in the car. The airspeed you don't have. It is far better to arrive late in this world than early in the next. Chez

Onime No Kyo -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 4:32:29 AM)
Come to think of it, I always thought the saying in the title was "If it moves salute it....

Titanwarrior89 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 4:39:12 AM)
"If there is to much coincidence. there probley is" Something to live by tactically in the field.[8\|]

Ron Saueracker -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 4:49:31 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo Come to think of it, I always thought the saying in the title was "If it moves salute it.... That's another version...peacetime. Just as good![:D]

Ron Saueracker -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 4:54:07 AM)
Got any good DS lines? Like... " You got a cat puke?" "No SGT!" "Well, just WTF have you been humping? Fur all over your uniform!"

AU Tiger_MatrixForum -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 4:58:47 AM)
the Standard Answer to the first question people asked of us (nukes): Q: How does nuclear power work? A: PFM (Pure F###ing Magic)

niceguy2005 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 7:02:59 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo Come to think of it, I always thought the saying in the title was "If it moves salute it.... Gives you some idea how Ron's navy works. [:'(][;)]

RUPD3658 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 7:53:19 AM)
I always loved: "Team work is essential. It gives the enemy someone else to shoot at"[:D]

Wallymanowar -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 8:33:33 AM)
Murphys laws for the Grunt - If the enemy is in range, so are you. - Incoming fire has the right of way. - Automatic weapons . . . aren't. - Suppressive fire . . . won't. - Don't look conspicuous, it draws fire. - There is always a way. When in doubt, empty the magazine. - Teamwork is essential. It gives them someone else to shoot at. - No combat ready unit ever passed inspection. No inspection ready unit ever passed combat. - The easy way is always mined. - Beer maths: two beers times 37 men equals 49 cases. - Things that must be together to work usually can't be shipped together. - Radios will fail as soon as you need fire support desperately. - Tracers work both ways. - Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo. - Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous. - The enemy invariably attacks on two occasions: (a) when you're ready for them and (b) when you're not ready for them. - If you can't remember, then the claymore is pointed at you. - The important things are always simple. The simple things are always hard. - The enemy diversion you have been ignoring will be the main attack. - A "sucking chest wound" is nature's way of telling you to slow down. - If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush. - Never draw fire, it irritates everyone around you. - Anything you do can get you shot, including nothing. - Make it tough enough for the enemy to get in and you won't be able to get out. - Never share a foxhole with anyone braver than yourself. - All 5-second grenade fuses will burn out in 3. - If you're short of everything but the enemy, you're in a combat zone. - When you have secured an area, don't forget to tell the enemy. - Never forget that your weapon is made by the lowest bidder. - If you take more than your fair share of objectives, you will have more than your fair share of objectives to take. - When both sides are convinced that they are about to lose, they are both right. - Murphy was a grunt.

Onime No Kyo -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 12:54:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: niceguy2005 quote: ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo Come to think of it, I always thought the saying in the title was "If it moves salute it.... Gives you some idea how Ron's navy works. [:'(][;)] Canadian navy? Umm...no. [8\|][;)]

BigJ62 -> RE: "If it moves, shoot it...if it don't, paint it." (11/5/2006 2:33:38 PM)
Most sayings we had involved the F word, more like every other word. When I was in the service I was able to take a tour of a Canadian ship and to my surprise they actually had a bar onboard well suffice it to say it would have been very rude of me to turn down any offers of alcoholic beverages. If they had asked I would have signed up on the spot.[:D]

siRkid -> How Navy Weapon Systems are bought (11/5/2006 4:00:04 PM)
The Chief is given a new weapon system to try out and reports to the Ensign that it's a pile of Bull ****. The Ensign reports to the Lieutenant that the new weapon system is manure. The LT reports to the Commander that the new system is like fertilizer but has potential for growth. The Commander reports to the Captain that the system is growing better all the time. The Captain reports to the Admiral that the new weapon system has grown beyond all expectations and should be bought. The Admiral buys the POS.

siRkid -> RE: How Navy Weapon Systems are bought (11/5/2006 4:04:39 PM)
When I was in the Navy, we were often sent to Air Force bases for RR when we were deployed overseas. We had a saying that the Air Force, when building a new base, built the Club, barracks and golf course first and would run out of money before building the runway. Congress would have to give them more money to complete the runway or the base would be useless. The Navy on the other hand would build the runway first and when they ran out of money for the club, barracks, and golf course we were told we could make do.

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