Cap Mandrake
Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002 From: Southern California Status: offline
|
Why didn't somebody warn me about the Viking Long Boat Ceremony? I have no time to myself and Stalker Girl is making fun of WITP. She is, however, highly vulnerable to counterattack, as she plays this on-line community farm thingy. She is not the least bit cowed about her avocation and frequently announces some strange guy is "plowing" (her field) her online. Should I be jealous? *****Reparations Tribunal, Government of the Phillipines in Exile, Jolo, July 13, 1943****** Plaintiff's Atty: Please state your name and position to the court. USAAF Col.:<Straightens his spine> James Fenimore Cathcart, Colonel, US Army Air Force, Commander 90th Bombardment Squadron, Medium. Judge: Colonel, do not mock the Court. USAAF Col.: Your Honor? Judge: Your second name. You made that up. USAAF Col.: Oh, no, Your Honor. I was named after my mother's great grandfather. He wrote Last of the Mohicans. Judge: Then his name was silly too. And I have never heard of the Mohicans either. I won't have it. USAAF Col.: But, Your Honor... Judge: Ehhh...ehhh...ehh. Quiet! Colonel, do you want to make General, or not? I know people. USAAF Col.: <hangs head> Yes, sir. Judge: You may proceed, Carlito. Plaintiff's Atty: Thank you, Tio....Colonel, can you tell the Court how many missions Captain Yossarian has flown? USAAF Col.: Over 100, I suspect. The 90th has received 3 Squadron citations from General Dreedle for productivity. Plaintiff's Atty: Productivity? Did that include destroying historic buildings? USAAF Col.: <Stands in witness box> I OBJECT! Judge: Colonel. Sit down. You can't object. You are a witness. Do I need to remind you about our agreement to excuse you from the named defendants? USAAF Col.: <sits down and hangs head> No, your Honor. I. Dunn Cheatham, Esq.: I object, Your Honor. Am I to understand the Court made a side agreement with a witness before the trial? That is most improper. Judge: Isadore, you are trying my patience. I want these procedings done by luncheon. Sit down. You may procede, Carlito. USAAF Col.: Thank you, Tio. <turns to witness> Colonel, please tell the Court about the Rules of Engagement for the 90th Bombardment Squadron....
< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/8/2009 6:43:42 PM >
_____________________________
|