Cap Mandrake
Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002 From: Southern California Status: offline
|
*********Operation You Know What Steering Committee Mtg., SEAC HQ, Ledo, January 28, 1943******** Staffer 1: Right then, let us call the meeting to order. Please review the minutes from this mornings meeting. Staffer 2: Page 4, third paragraph. The Major is quoted saying you know what. <makes air quotes> Staffer 1: Oh, bloody Hell! Would the secretary please, please strike that. Please, We've a bloody war to fight. Honestly! Anything else? Staffer 2: Yes, page 8, second paragraph. The text reads "..if, in the case of illness, the Chairman was to be absent..". Staffer 3: What is wrong with that? Staffer 2: Why, it should be "were" not "was". It's the subjunctive tense. It is meant to imply conditionality. Staffer 1: I am with the Major on this. There is only one Chairman. Why would we use the plural form "were"? Staffer 2: But it isn't the plural form, it's the singular. Staffer 1: Yes it is. Staffer 2: No it isn't. Staffer 1: Yes it is. One doesn't say "I were fishing". Staffer 2: But that is the past tense. Staffer 3: Colonel, most clearly the meeting happened in the past. Staffer 2: But the regulation refers to a possible future event. Staffer 1: My head is beginning to hurt again. Let's put it to a vote. All those in favor of retaining the existing language? <two hands go up> And nay? <no hands are raised> Colonel, you spoke in favor of new language. Do you decline to vote for it now? Staffer 2: What is the point? Staffer 1: It is a matter of principle. That is what we are fighting for. Staffer 2: Very well, you want principle, I abstain on principle. Staffer 1: Splendid! Oh bloody Hell. Strike that please. The vote is in favor of retaining the existing singular form <Staffer 2 crosses his arms in a pique> Now, when we adjourned I had called for ideas for a motto for Operation You Know What. What have you gentlemen? Staffer 3:How about "India expects every man to do his duty". Staffer 1: Not bad, not bad. A bit derivative, I think. Staffer 3: I have more. How about "For Vishnu, for India, FOR CURRY!"........
|