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RE: Call for quote - 6/22/2008 9:44:22 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

What is the usual response to question 334?


That would depend on how the respondent answered question number 157 ("Chicks dig me").

Your average Narcissistic Personality Disorder would say yes but your average Sociopath would, even if it were true, probably answer "no" just to annoy the authorities.

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)
Post #: 2401
RE: Call for quote - 6/22/2008 10:26:48 PM   
Onime No Kyo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


quote:

ORIGINAL: Onime No Kyo

What is the usual response to question 334?


That would depend on how the respondent answered question number 157 ("Chicks dig me").

Your average Narcissistic Personality Disorder would say yes but your average Sociopath would, even if it were true, probably answer "no" just to annoy the authorities.



Is there any conclusive data linking gout and sociopathy?

_____________________________

"Mighty is the Thread! Great are its works and insane are its inhabitants!" -Brother Mynok

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2402
RE: Call for quote - 6/23/2008 12:05:43 AM   
Nemo121


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Yes

(in reply to Onime No Kyo)
Post #: 2403
RE: Memories - 6/24/2008 2:34:24 PM   
rtrapasso


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Anyone remember the days when there were no house rules and nobody knew what an AAR was? You just took the darn out of the box and just played it! If you got a little peanut butter on the map..ah...Miss Zuniga would fix it. She was hot too. Sometimes I would purposely send a convoy south of New Zealand just to see her bend down in her tight skirt.....ahhh...memories.







That cloning technology is really taking off!!!

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2404
RE: Memories - 6/24/2008 3:48:07 PM   
Terminus


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I had to do a double take to grasp the full horror of that picture... Good Thread!

_____________________________

We are all dreams of the Giant Space Butterfly.

(in reply to rtrapasso)
Post #: 2405
RE: Memories - 6/24/2008 4:17:36 PM   
Canoerebel


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It's a nightmarish photograph, not only for that teacher, but for the viewers.  The "little girl" second from the right on the bottom row is one ugly duckling.

Edit: And the leftmost on the middle row isn't going to win any beauty prizes. Yikes!

< Message edited by Canoerebel -- 6/24/2008 4:19:50 PM >

(in reply to Terminus)
Post #: 2406
RE: Memories - 6/24/2008 7:25:04 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Canoerebel

It's a nightmarish photograph, not only for that teacher, but for the viewers. The "little girl" second from the right on the bottom row is one ugly duckling.

Edit: And the leftmost on the middle row isn't going to win any beauty prizes. Yikes!


Yes..she looks like a cross between Bill and Mike Ditka

(in reply to Canoerebel)
Post #: 2407
KB on the prowl - 6/24/2008 7:26:13 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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..




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Post #: 2408
RE: KB on the prowl - 6/24/2008 10:27:56 PM   
tabpub


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.




Attachment (1)

_____________________________

Sing to the tune of "Man on the Flying Trapeze"
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2409
RE: KB on the prowl - 6/25/2008 1:40:03 AM   
BrucePowers


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Ouch!!!!

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Post #: 2410
RE: KB on the prowl - 6/28/2008 12:51:52 PM   
BrucePowers


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Tabpub, we need more details please.

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Post #: 2411
RE: KB on the prowl - 6/29/2008 6:07:24 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: BrucePowers

Tabpub, we need more details please.


Indeed. I have a cool map but cannot post it. Here is what happened at Fiji.

As the Marine F4F's at Nandi and Suva had taken a bit of a beating, all fighters were instructed to prepare for CAP as soon as the sun rose. In the interim, all aircraft were to be dispersed and all ordinance to be stored in bunkers to prepare for the Jap heavy surface forces which were sure to come. Only the PBY's would be flying strike missions (at night). A single flotilla of 6 PT boats were available at Nandi. To guard Suva, there were 12 PT boats in two groups plus HMNZS KIWI (PG) and 3 USN Subchasers who were deemed so "fungible" they did not even have proper names. The remaining USN fast combatants (USS New Orelans and 6 x DD) and undamaged fast auxillaries made for Canton. They would have to skirt the Jap seaplane base at Funafuti to avoid the Bettys in Samoa but they were no match for the Jap heavies bearing down on Fiji.

The Japanese carriers and CVE's, in fact, turned West toward Noumea as soon as they recovered their planes and were out of the battle. The enemy aimed to deal a powerful blow with surface bombardment. Instead of the 4 BB's spotted the day before, there were, in fact, 5. YAMATO, KONGO, HARUNA, MUTSU and 3 x DD bearing down on Nandi while KIRISHIMA and 3 heavy cruisers (MYOKO, TONE and CHIKUMA) and 2 x DD closed on Suva Harbor.

Night of 1-23/24:

01:20 MINEKAZI strikes a mine as the Western force approaches Nandi. Her back is broken and she begins to sink immediately. One DD is tasked with recovering the survivors while the remaining force moves on.

01:32 The Nandi bombardment force is attacked by PT boats. With only one DD left in the screen, the Jap BB's turn away and the 2nd DD is recalled from rescue duty to protect the battleships. Neither side suffers losses in this engagement but a great deal of time is gained for the defenders.

01:48 As the Suva bombardment force nears its target, CHIKUMA, strikes a mine and begins to burn below deck. She can make only 12 kts and is detached, retiring to the SW.

01:58-02:30 The Suva force is engaged by 12 PT boats and HMNZS KIWI and the USN Subchasers. Two of the PT boats and the entire KIWI force are destroyed without scoring any torpedo hits. In addition, 3 RAN coastal minesweepers are spotted and disptached.

02:40-03:30 The Suva force bombards the harbor and airfield, damaging several previously damaged transports at anchor and sinking a Dutch AP but only 2 aircraft are destroyed on the field.

02:55 The 4 BB Nandi force finally arrives on station, exchanging gunfire with shore batteries, but fails to damage a single aircraft.

03:45 USS SAILFISH attacks and then is depth charged by the retreating escorts of the Suva force.

04:10 USS SAILFISH torpedoes KONGO in a narrow straight West of Vitu Levu. KONGO slows noticeably but survives.




On the 25th, with both Fiji airfields fully operational. Marine SBD's and the Yorktown Torepdo squadron (which was flown off to Nandi some time ago) find and sink the wounded CHIKUMA. Bombers from Samoa find and damage USS CALHOUN (APD) and USS FULLER (APA) attmepting to escape to Canton. Both are moderately damaged and will survive.


< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 6/29/2008 6:11:47 PM >

(in reply to BrucePowers)
Post #: 2412
USS Sailfish - 6/29/2008 6:28:28 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:



INCOMING MESSAGE, SOUTHPAC

FROM: USS SAILFISH
TIME: 07:25:24:01:43

HAVE ATTACKED ENEMY DESTROYERS AND KONGO CLASS BB WEST VITU LEVU STOP SECOND TARGET HIT BY ONE TORPEDO AND SLOWED STOP JUST TO CLARIFY SHE WAS SLOWED BUT DID NOT REALLY STOP STOP THE STOP IS JUST IN THERE BECAUSE EVERYONE SEEMS TO DO IT THAT WAY STOP WE CAN STOP DOING THAT IF YOU WISH US TO STOP STOP FURTHER WE BELIEVE TWO ATTACKS IN ONE HEX IN ONE NIGHT DO NOT VIOLATE NAVAL CODE OF 1925 BECAUSE ESCORTS BELIEVED PART OF SEPARATE TASK FORCE STOP OF COURSE COMMA WE CAN STOP DOING THIS IF OUR READING IN ERROR STOP DO YOU WANT US TO STOP QUESTION MARK STOP WILL MOVE TO INTERCEPT OF DAMAGED ENEMY VESSEL AS INSTRUCTED STOP WHEN WE SAY END THE NEXT TIME IT WILL BE THE END OF THE MESSAGE END OH WAIT COMMA WE JUST REALIZED WE SAID END THREE TIMES STOP WELL COMMA MORE LIKE FOUR TIMES NOW STOP IN INTEREST OF BREVITY WILL JUST FINISH NOW END PERIOD

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 6/29/2008 6:31:28 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2413
RE: USS Sailfish - 6/29/2008 11:45:32 PM   
BrucePowers


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Post #: 2414
40 inches of steel - 7/2/2008 12:24:35 AM   
Cap Mandrake


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**************Postions of HQ Coy, 32nd ID, Perth Perimeter, 01:30, January 28, 1943***************



Pvt. Billy Barty waddles to his friend's side. The 2nd sousaphonist of the divisional band has fallen back in the trench. As the 1st piccolo nears him he can see a neat Jap hole in the middle of his forehead. "Jap bastards" he spits. Apparently someone forgot to tell the last holdouts of the Imperial Guards division that their position was hopeless. Instead of surrendering, they were attacking the postiions of 32nd ID in a night attack. Their losses were catastrophic, of course, but they had penetrated to the defences of the divison HQ Coy.

The second clarinet, some 20 yds down the trenchline shouts out, "HERE THEY COME AGAIN!" Pvt. Barty grabs his friend's Garand and hops up on his sousaphone case. As he peers over the sandbag he realizes the warning from the second clarinet contained the wrong pronoun. He might have said, "Here HE comes again!" A lone Japanese Lt., charges toward him, face bloodied and sword drawn, screaming a scream he must have practiced as a child. Pvt. Barty squeezes off a round. Lt Honda, the highest ranking living officer of the Imperial Guards Division, indeed, the last remaining living member of the Imperial Guards Division in Australia, spins and falls dead, a neat American hole in his forehead. The sound of Lt. Honda's death yell is replaced by.....nothing.....absolutely nothing.....for the first time in many, many months.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2415
RE: 40 inches of steel - 7/2/2008 3:46:20 AM   
Moondawggie


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Wow! Despite the carnage at Nandi and Suva, one truth dominates the Paific Theater:

When Pvt. Billy Barty gets mad, people DIE!

Mandrake, Tabpub, congrats on the victory at Perth. I'll break open a bottle of Swan Beer to salute you...






Attachment (1)

_____________________________

"The Yankees got all the smart ones, and look where it got them."

General George Pickett, the night before Gettysburg

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2416
Vitu Levu - 7/2/2008 6:08:12 AM   
Cap Mandrake


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..




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Post #: 2417
RE: Vitu Levu - 7/2/2008 3:42:42 PM   
BrucePowers


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The attachments are back

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Post #: 2418
Guy with a turban - 7/2/2008 7:04:12 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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*************Colombo Harbour, Ceylon, January 28, 1943***************


A convoy of 3 lorries has just pulled up to the quay. Admiral Phillips, Commander, Eastern Fleet Office of Planning and Logistics and Matters of That Sort, steps up to greet a turbaned man who has just stepped down off a lorry.

Admiral Phillips: Narindar, have you brought the goods?

Turbaned Guy: Yes Admiral...dees ees de finest quality. <his head bobs rhythmically with his voice>

Admiral Phillips: We shall see, Narindar, we shall see. As the Russians say, "trrust boot vareefy".

Turbaned Guy: I am sorrysir. I did not understand.

Admiral Phillips: I said "trust but verify", Narindar, I was affecting a Russian accent.

Turbaned Guy: Ah, yes, I see sir. Russian ..haha..vaaryvaary clever sir.

Admiral Phillips: <pulls a heavily chromed 10 inch switch blade out of his pocket and presses a button, instantly revealing a well sharpened blade. The Turbaned Guy briefly dispalys some alarm in his eyes until the Admiral jabs the blade all the way to the handle into one of the 40 lb bags on the bed of the nearest lorry. A trickle of yellow powder issues from the bag. The Admiral scoops up some of the powder with his elongated fifth fingernail, sniffs cautiously, then touches a small amount to his tongue. He betrays no emotions on his face for perhaps 20 seconds. The Turbaned Guy begins to sweat noticeably.> Damn good ****, Narindar. Damn good!


Operation You Know What has begun

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2419
RE: Guy with a turban - 7/2/2008 7:06:42 PM   
BrucePowers


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What do I know??

I know nothing, nothing

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2420
Motto Grotto - 7/3/2008 3:58:17 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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*********Operation You Know What Steering Committee Mtg., SEAC HQ, Ledo, January 28, 1943********

Staffer 1:
Right then, let us call the meeting to order. Please review the minutes from this mornings meeting.


Staffer 2:
Page 4, third paragraph. The Major is quoted saying you know what. <makes air quotes>


Staffer 1:
Oh, bloody Hell! Would the secretary please, please strike that. Please, We've a bloody war to fight. Honestly! Anything else?


Staffer 2:
Yes, page 8, second paragraph. The text reads "..if, in the case of illness, the Chairman was to be absent..".


Staffer 3:
What is wrong with that?


Staffer 2:
Why, it should be "were" not "was". It's the subjunctive tense. It is meant to imply conditionality.


Staffer 1:
I am with the Major on this. There is only one Chairman. Why would we use the plural form "were"?


Staffer 2:
But it isn't the plural form, it's the singular.


Staffer 1:
Yes it is.


Staffer 2:
No it isn't.


Staffer 1:
Yes it is. One doesn't say "I were fishing".


Staffer 2:
But that is the past tense.


Staffer 3:
Colonel, most clearly the meeting happened in the past.


Staffer 2:
But the regulation refers to a possible future event.


Staffer 1:
My head is beginning to hurt again. Let's put it to a vote. All those in favor of retaining the existing language? <two hands go up> And nay? <no hands are raised> Colonel, you spoke in favor of new language. Do you decline to vote for it now?


Staffer 2:
What is the point?


Staffer 1:
It is a matter of principle. That is what we are fighting for.


Staffer 2:
Very well, you want principle, I abstain on principle.


Staffer 1:
Splendid! Oh bloody Hell. Strike that please. The vote is in favor of retaining the existing singular form <Staffer 2 crosses his arms in a pique> Now, when we adjourned I had called for ideas for a motto for Operation You Know What. What have you gentlemen?


Staffer 3:
How about "India expects every man to do his duty".


Staffer 1:
Not bad, not bad. A bit derivative, I think.


Staffer 3:
I have more. How about "For Vishnu, for India, FOR CURRY!"........

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2421
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/3/2008 7:04:52 PM   
BrucePowers


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I just love these staff meetings.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2422
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/5/2008 10:57:15 AM   
tabpub


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quote:

ORIGINAL: BrucePowers

I just love these staff meetings.

You should read the transcripts from our monthly phone confabs....

_____________________________

Sing to the tune of "Man on the Flying Trapeze"
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...

(in reply to BrucePowers)
Post #: 2423
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/5/2008 4:26:29 PM   
Moondawggie


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I thought these WERE the transcripts!

_____________________________

"The Yankees got all the smart ones, and look where it got them."

General George Pickett, the night before Gettysburg

(in reply to tabpub)
Post #: 2424
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/5/2008 8:13:22 PM   
tabpub


Posts: 1019
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

I thought these WERE the transcripts!


Naw..ours go something like this....
.....
Mandrake: Now, I notice a C47 group up in the Aleutians; send it to me in SEAC please.

Tabpub: No, it's busy.

Mandrake: Doing what?

Tabpub: Flying King Crabs back to the High Command, what else would it be doing? Seriously, he has a lot of subs and A/C out of Kiska interdicting my supply runs to Amchitcka Island and I need it.

Mandrake: Well, I need it also. My Giant Slugs haul supply so slowly towards the front lines in Burma I have to have air transports!!

Tabpub: Well, he cut the road to China and I can't rebuild the Nationalist Army without supplies! I will send this group if you promise to increase the commitment on flying in supplies to the Chinese to 3 squadrons per day at a minimum. Chiang loves his Dom Perignon and has to have it every evening you know.

Mandrake: Ok, now about some Corsairs for SEAC.....

Tabpub: oh, brother....not this again....
........

_____________________________

Sing to the tune of "Man on the Flying Trapeze"
..Oh! We fly o'er the treetops with inches to spare,
There's smoke in the cockpit and gray in my hair.
The tracers look fine as a strafin' we go.
But, brother, we're TOO God damn low...

(in reply to Moondawggie)
Post #: 2425
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/5/2008 8:43:17 PM   
BrucePowers


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quote:

ORIGINAL: tabpub


quote:

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

I thought these WERE the transcripts!


Naw..ours go something like this....
.....
Mandrake: Now, I notice a C47 group up in the Aleutians; send it to me in SEAC please.

Tabpub: No, it's busy.

Mandrake: Doing what?

Tabpub: Flying King Crabs back to the High Command, what else would it be doing? Seriously, he has a lot of subs and A/C out of Kiska interdicting my supply runs to Amchitcka Island and I need it.

Mandrake: Well, I need it also. My Giant Slugs haul supply so slowly towards the front lines in Burma I have to have air transports!!

Tabpub: Well, he cut the road to China and I can't rebuild the Nationalist Army without supplies! I will send this group if you promise to increase the commitment on flying in supplies to the Chinese to 3 squadrons per day at a minimum. Chiang loves his Dom Perignon and has to have it every evening you know.

Mandrake: Ok, now about some Corsairs for SEAC.....

Tabpub: oh, brother....not this again....
........



(in reply to tabpub)
Post #: 2426
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/5/2008 9:41:05 PM   
bradfordkay

 

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"Mandrake: Ok, now about some Corsairs for SEAC.....

Tabpub: oh, brother....not this again...."

He can always strip the RN carriers of their Corsairs.

_____________________________

fair winds,
Brad

(in reply to BrucePowers)
Post #: 2427
Havin' my baby... - 7/6/2008 6:28:37 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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..




Attachment (1)

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2428
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/6/2008 6:31:15 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

ORIGINAL: bradfordkay

"Mandrake: Ok, now about some Corsairs for SEAC.....

Tabpub: oh, brother....not this again...."

He can always strip the RN carriers of their Corsairs.


Corsairs? CORSAIRS? Why don't you guys tell me these things? Operation You Know What is under way and I am still flying those crappy Fulmars? Holy Heck! Are you guys rooting for the Japs?

(in reply to bradfordkay)
Post #: 2429
RE: Motto Grotto - 7/6/2008 6:37:16 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
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quote:

ORIGINAL: tabpub


quote:

ORIGINAL: Moondawggie

I thought these WERE the transcripts!


Naw..ours go something like this....
.....
Mandrake: Now, I notice a C47 group up in the Aleutians; send it to me in SEAC please.

Tabpub: No, it's busy.

Mandrake: Doing what?

Tabpub: Flying King Crabs back to the High Command, what else would it be doing? Seriously, he has a lot of subs and A/C out of Kiska interdicting my supply runs to Amchitcka Island and I need it.

Mandrake: Well, I need it also. My Giant Slugs haul supply so slowly towards the front lines in Burma I have to have air transports!!

Tabpub: Well, he cut the road to China and I can't rebuild the Nationalist Army without supplies! I will send this group if you promise to increase the commitment on flying in supplies to the Chinese to 3 squadrons per day at a minimum. Chiang loves his Dom Perignon and has to have it every evening you know.

Mandrake: Ok, now about some Corsairs for SEAC.....

Tabpub: oh, brother....not this again....
........



Yes SEAC is continually getting annoying requisitions from China. What is the big deal? Do you think there were cargo aircraft flying over the Himalayas before the war. You guys just need to live within your means. The most dangerous jobs in the RAF and USAAF right now are cargo pilots. Y'all need to lighten up.

(in reply to tabpub)
Post #: 2430
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