When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven

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When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven

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When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 5:16:34 AM

David Heath

Posts: 3274
Joined: 3/29/2000
From: Staten Island NY
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Al Gore, Bill and Hillary Clinton go to heaven, and God addresses Al first. ''Al, what do you believe in?''

Al replies: "Well, I believe that I won that election, but that it was your will that I did not serve. And I've

come to understand that now.''

God thinks for a second and says: "Very good. Come and sit at my left.''

God then addresses Bill. "Bill, what do you believe in?''

Bill replies: "I believe in forgiveness. I've sinned, but I've never held a grudge against my fellow man and I

hope no grudges are held against me.''

God thinks for a second and says: "You are forgiven come and sit at my right.''

Then God addresses Hillary. "Hillary, what do you believe in?''

She replies: "I believe you're in my chair."

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RE: When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 6:03:04 AM

GaryChildress

Posts: 6830
Joined: 7/17/2005
From: The Divided Nations of Earth
Status: offline

Waiting for thread to get locked...

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RE: When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 7:48:59 AM

cdbeck

Posts: 1374
Joined: 8/16/2005
From: Indiana
Status: offline

This one is in a little poor taste:

George W Bush, Dick Cheney, and Condalezza Rice are flying in Air Force One. Rice turns and says, "I could open that door, throw out a check for $10,000 and make one American really happy."

Cheney scoffs, "That's nothing! Heck, I could throw out ten $1,000 checks out and make ten Americans happy!"

Bush smiles, "That's nothing! I should throw one hundred $100 bills out and make one hundred Americans happy!"

The pilot, who had been listening in, starts to laugh. The co-pilot asks him, "what is so funny?"

The pilot responds, "I could throw all three of those guys out, and make 75% of America happy."

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"Neca eos omnes. Deus suos agnoscet!"
(Kill them all. God will know his own.)

-- Arnaud-Armaury, the Albigensian Crusade

(in reply to GaryChildress)

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RE: When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 8:54:04 AM

JudgeDredd

Posts: 8573
Joined: 11/14/2003
From: Scotland
Status: offline

Niow it will be locked!

(in reply to cdbeck)

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RE: When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 10:01:08 AM

Greybriar

Posts: 1148
Joined: 2/9/2007
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Then there's this one:

Hello, President Bush

After numerous rounds of "We don't know if Osama is still alive," Osama himself decided to send President George W. Bush a note in his own handwriting to let him know he was still in the game.

Bush opened the note, which appeared to contain a single line of coded message: 370HSSV-0773H.

Bush was baffled, so he E-mailed it to Condoleezza Rice. Rice and her aides had no clue either, so they sent it to the FBI. No one could solve it at the FBI, so it went to the CIA, then to the NSA. With no clue as to its meaning, the FBI finally asked Marine Corps Intelligence for help.

Within a few seconds, the Marines cabled back with this reply: "Tell President Bush he's holding the message upside down."

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This war is not about slavery. --Robert E. Lee

(in reply to JudgeDredd)

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RE: When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 10:14:39 AM

sterckxe

Posts: 4605
Joined: 3/30/2004
From: Flanders
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: JudgeDredd
Niow it will be locked!

Frankly, I�m a little disappointed in Mr. Heath as the forum rules clearly state �no politics�.
Lead by example and all that �

That said, and before the Matrix admins come to their senses

:

Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason and you don't want any of that stuff on you.

Greetz,

Eddy Sterckx

(in reply to JudgeDredd)

Post #: 6

RE: When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 11:17:26 AM

Erik Rutins

Posts: 37503
Joined: 3/28/2000
From: Vermont, USA
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Hey Dave,

Sorry, but "no Politics". Thread locked.

Regards,

- Erik

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For official support, please use our Help Desk: http://www.matrixgames.com/helpdesk/

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RE: When Al, Bill & Hillary Went to Heaven - 7/9/2008 3:38:10 PM

David Heath

Posts: 3274
Joined: 3/29/2000
From: Staten Island NY
Status: offline

Hi Guys

Sorry if I upset anyone.... I was not trying to break the "no politics" rule. I saw this only as a joke and not as trying to take sides. I was working late and read this and it made me laugh so I figured I share it. Ok now back to our regular schedule event.

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Post #: 8