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Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/17/2008 11:23:36 PM

Phatguy

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Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Buffalo,ny
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I've been mostly house bound for the last month.I've had time to think about "gaming" in general, but mostly what we are all here for, mainly war games. I had a discussion with my wife about this. I've been a gamer(war,sports,board,computer)since I was 15.Been a party hound, booze hound,bouncer, bartender,drummer, so not the "gamer" in the classical sense people generalize us to be.You know, runny nose and a plethora of pocket protectors and a years supply of Jolt...Here is where it gets interesting.. My wife gave me Carte Blanche(with reasonable financial spending.ie $150/month) in regards to gaming. She doesnt mind me spending most days playing comp games or board games.Even evenings are ok as long as I find time to do dishes and go shopping once in a while with her. Also all "family" events(Easter, Christmas, helloween, St Patricks etc etc...) are mandatory.

She told me that my hobby keeps me happy and therefore keeps me out of trouble and my eyes dont wander..... She thinks it's a price worth paying. Also I have gotten her a bit interested in games but not the serious stuff like CNA. Just fluff right now as she has outright stated she failed history in HS(she's an accountant) and wouldnt know a Panther from a Sherman.
So any one else have it so good? I'm interested in hearing from those who are married mainly but any serious relationship is good. My wife is also interested in finding out ..

Thanks,
Bart

Post #: 1

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/17/2008 11:38:44 PM

ilovestrategy

Posts: 3611
Joined: 6/11/2005
From: San Diego
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I LOVE games. Being born in 1967 my first gaming experience was in the 70's with PONG, then pen and paper Dungeons and Dragons. Champions, MERCS, and on to Star Fleet Battles.
Now with a wife and kid I can no longer play pen and paper or board games so I play a lot on my 360 and my gaming PC.
I play a lot. A whole lot. But wife and kid always come first. One thing I have found from experience is that when you make sure the wife and kid get quality time 2 things happen.
First, you don't feel guilty for playing so much.
And second, the wife and kids have had their quality time with you, garbage is taken out by you, and the lawn is mowed.
Wife is happy, watches TV, kid is happy and plays or talks to her(I have a daughter) friends on the phone and you are left alone to play.

Balance, my friend, balance. I just passed my 18 wedding anniversary and I still get my playing time in so I'm doing something right.

_____________________________

After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!!
Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

(in reply to Phatguy)

Post #: 2

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/17/2008 11:44:15 PM

ilovestrategy

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Joined: 6/11/2005
From: San Diego
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She doesn't know the difference between a Sherman and Panther?

This is a Sherman

And this is a panther!

_____________________________

After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!!
Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

(in reply to ilovestrategy)

Post #: 3

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/17/2008 11:55:02 PM

Phatguy

Posts: 1348
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Buffalo,ny
Status: offline

BwaaHaaaaHaaaHaa Ha....gotta show her.....

Man, our lives are� a bit similar, 1966 here,D&D in the 70's..No pong where I lived..lots of sand and Roman ruins though. 4 yrs in on marriage and 1 daughter

< Message edited by apathetic lurker -- 10/17/2008 11:56:41 PM >

(in reply to ilovestrategy)

Post #: 4

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/17/2008 11:55:54 PM

06 Maestro

Posts: 3989
Joined: 10/12/2005
From: Nevada, USA
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My wife (of 20 years) had stated several times that she is glad I am interested in military gaming rather than golfing, sports bar scene, and so on. She knows where I'm at and here if she needs me. She has never complained about my game purchases either. I only buy 3 or 4 games a year though. I think I might get a complaint if I was to spend 150 bucks per month on games though. Depending on the Christmas sale, I may just do that-and I'll be safe from harassment

.
She also drops hints here and there about me spending too much time on the puter-I ignore that stuff and all is well. When I was a TOAW psycho (10 to 3 years ago) she would normally bring me my dinner to my desk-no questions asked.

(in reply to Phatguy)

Post #: 5

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 12:00:24 AM

ilovestrategy

Posts: 3611
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From: San Diego
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Oh so your daughter is small? A word of advice. When she gets to about 6 years old or so, take her out on a lot of daddy daughter dates. The reason is, when she gets to be a teenager she will become more independent and you will miss out.
I took my daughter out for a lot of dates and the result is that we are very close now.
I tried my best to convert her to my gaming hobby but she said "games are for kids" and for me to enjoy "my flashing lights and noises"

_____________________________

After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!!
Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

(in reply to Phatguy)

Post #: 6

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 12:00:26 AM

Phatguy

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From: Buffalo,ny
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My wife has one request besides the ones I listed... Pay the bills and put some away. 150 is mine unless something happens. But with her salary that hasn't happened till now. Obviously now with me only getting disability checks the 150 went out the window. Sure I can afford to pay my share of the bills and still have 150 but it just doesnt seem fair .

(in reply to 06 Maestro)

Post #: 7

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 12:01:58 AM

ilovestrategy

Posts: 3611
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From: San Diego
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quote:

ORIGINAL: 06 Maestro

she would normally bring me my dinner to my desk-no questions asked.

My wife has done that. "Here is your snack little boy...."

_____________________________

After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!!
Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

(in reply to 06 Maestro)

Post #: 8

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 12:04:02 AM

Phatguy

Posts: 1348
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From: Buffalo,ny
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ilovestrategy

Oh so your daughter is small? A word of advice. When she gets to about 6 years old or so, take her out on a lot of daddy daughter dates. The reason is, when she gets to be a teenager she will become more independent and you will miss out.
I took my daughter out for a lot of dates and the result is that we are very close now.
I tried my best to convert her to my gaming hobby but she said "games are for kids" and for me to enjoy "my flashing lights and noises"

No she is 12(been in her life since 6)..I consider her my daughter and she considers me her dad but it's all step something..

We both game though.. She prefers her girlie things but we both have LOTRO which is cool. She actually tells me more about her school, friends and such than her mom... I'm the advice dude to her.

(in reply to ilovestrategy)

Post #: 9

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 12:09:41 AM

ilovestrategy

Posts: 3611
Joined: 6/11/2005
From: San Diego
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$150 a month for games is a bit much. I'm still playing CIV IV, Sins of a Solar Empire and a few others that were bought months ago. You could play the games you have now and save that up for a really nice gaming laptop. Decent ones are $1500 now, not like they used to be.

It just occurred to be that I may be lecturing you. If so, I apologize if I am, that was not my intention.

_____________________________

After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!!
Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

(in reply to ilovestrategy)

Post #: 10

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 12:11:27 AM

ilovestrategy

Posts: 3611
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From: San Diego
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quote:

ORIGINAL: apathetic lurker

quote:

ORIGINAL: ilovestrategy

Oh so your daughter is small? A word of advice. When she gets to about 6 years old or so, take her out on a lot of daddy daughter dates. The reason is, when she gets to be a teenager she will become more independent and you will miss out.
I took my daughter out for a lot of dates and the result is that we are very close now.
I tried my best to convert her to my gaming hobby but she said "games are for kids" and for me to enjoy "my flashing lights and noises"

No she is 12(been in her life since 6)..I consider her my daughter and she considers me her dad but it's all step something..

We both game though.. She prefers her girlie things but we both have LOTRO which is cool. She actually tells me more about her school, friends and such than her mom... I'm the advice dude to her.

I'm on Nimrodel. I have a 50 guardian and just got my lore master up to 42. She is in Angmar now. God, I hate that place with the passion of a thousand burning suns.

_____________________________

After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!!
Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

(in reply to Phatguy)

Post #: 11

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 12:41:59 AM

Phatguy

Posts: 1348
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Buffalo,ny
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We are hangin in Brandywine..21lm, 38hun, 37champ, 21Capt, 35Guard...lots of fun..same kin too.

Well the 150 is a max to spend. I dont(usually) reach it. I dont even carry-over if I spend less. What it really does is gives me leeway if I want to get that expensive boardgame� out there. Havent done it yet but have had my eye on DAK2(100) War in the pacific(400+) and stuff like that. If I keep my spending down I could easily get a 400 dollar game without getting the wifes Irish blood boiling. Would I do it? No. But knowing I could keeps me from actually buying it just to have something I cant afford. Keeping up with the Joneses syndrome.

Remember this is all prior to my surgery...Right now it has changed a bit. Will stay changed probably until about 6 months after I return to work just to rebuild a bit in my bank account .My wife knows this but she insists I spend some of the quarter bottle money on games.. She feels bad for me.

ps: hate laptops for gaming.just doesnt feel right....

< Message edited by apathetic lurker -- 10/18/2008 12:45:12 AM >

(in reply to ilovestrategy)

Post #: 12

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 1:38:46 AM

junk2drive

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Met my wife in 1971, married in 72. Got Pong at Sears, then Atari. Many nights we spent trying to beat the final level on Space Invaders. Then Nintendo, Super N, N64, Apple IIe, PC. Since 2001 we have had a computer room, hers and mine PCs, she plays Pogo games, I play my wargames. We share what we are doing and always know where each other is.

(in reply to Phatguy)

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 3:24:18 AM

ilovestrategy

Posts: 3611
Joined: 6/11/2005
From: San Diego
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quote:

ORIGINAL: apathetic lurker

War in the pacific(400+) and stuff like that.

Wow, I did not know a WiTP board game existed! I can only imagine how huge that must be!

_____________________________

After 16 years, Civ II still has me in it's clutches LOL!!!
Now CIV IV has me in it's evil clutches!

(in reply to Phatguy)

Post #: 14

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 4:47:56 AM

Jeffrey H.

Posts: 3154
Joined: 4/13/2007
From: San Diego, Ca.
Status: offline

My wife feels much the same as yours. She wants me to enjoy the things I enjoy. She knows that sometimes means I'm away from her and our home. Occasionally I over do it and spend too much time on the computer and she lets me know. I try to take it in stride and find a way to make it up to her.

Money isn't a big deal, it's time really, time I spend at this hobby or that hobby. We can't never get the time back, money don't count for much.

So, we try to find our balance. I accept her opinion when I'm spending too much time on my hobby, I don't worry about it.

_____________________________

History began July 4th, 1776. Anything before that was a mistake.

Ron Swanson

(in reply to ilovestrategy)

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 6:00:23 AM

Phatguy

Posts: 1348
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Buffalo,ny
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quote:

ORIGINAL: ilovestrategy

quote:

ORIGINAL: apathetic lurker

War in the pacific(400+) and stuff like that.

Wow, I did not know a WiTP board game existed! I can only imagine how huge that must be!

9000+ counters and seven huge maps say it isn't a beer and pretzels version of anything......

(in reply to ilovestrategy)

Post #: 16

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 6:03:41 AM

Phatguy

Posts: 1348
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From: Buffalo,ny
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The one thing my wife would not be happy about is me going away for the weekend to a convention. Now if she went that's a different story.. Trying to figure out if there's any woman things to do in Columbus....

(in reply to Phatguy)

Post #: 17

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 6:46:05 AM

ANZAC_Tack

Posts: 392
Joined: 7/9/2001
From: Australia
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OMG 150 p/m i spent that in the last decade! lol...

my wife cracks the ****s big time occationally, threatening to throw the PC out the window,she once hid all my closecombat CD's,fortunately i found a NO CD program after that....CCIII was the most addictive for me,5+years of H2H, AI Grand Campaigns(hundrens of extra modded maps,dozens of different mods making it like a new game every few months) it came to a peak after our second child,she was post natal,and i was close to "bailing out!" if i even went into the computer room it was 'fight night'. my gaming has been obsessive at times, work 8 hrs,do my internet stuff a hour,then kids/clean/home ****/dinner,then maybe 1 to 3 hrs max gaming.weekends i might of got a 1 to 3 hrs extra. CoD4 for last 3/4 months has been a ride of adrellin,but i miss the tactical side of gaming, and awaiting CC WaR with much impatience.

i have been a gamer for decades also,pong,space invaders,galaga,FPS at arcades,pinball,then a appleIIe with pinball,that helicopter shooter,hitch hikers guide to the galaxy(all typed interface) and a brilliant tactical game i cant remember think'dark forest',then my first PC was win95 pent 1, KKND,cannon fodder,then the HOLY FUGGIN GRAIL, CLOSE COMBAT(1)...it was all over red rover for me then...wow...I held St Lo with 1 panther VG and 1 Jagdpanther and 1 command infanty team untill december 1945 lol...thousands of smoked 75's shermans,jacksons M39's,stuarts,76's shermans...and the bodies...fortunately for game play the wrecks dissapear after a few days...lucky scrap metal merchants...

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ANZAC_Tack

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 7:30:07 AM

Zap

Posts: 3639
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From: LAS VEGAS TAKE A CHANCE
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My wife has accepted it pretty well sometimes. Were together 14 years. I get carried away at times, up till 5:00 am playing an ingrossing campaign.

I've made her very happy recently giving her a third bathroom, and a new kitchen. Placing new marble flooring in two bathrooms and the new kitchen. This Should glaze over her eyes for a while. No matter how much I play she will only see her hero.

< Message edited by Zap -- 10/18/2008 7:47:19 AM >

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 7:41:23 AM

BoredStiff

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quote:

ORIGINAL: apathetic lurker

Also I have gotten her a bit interested in games but not the serious stuff like CNA. Just fluff right now as she has outright stated she failed history in HS(she's an accountant) and wouldnt know a Panther from a Sherman.

Check out BoardGameGeek.com for many ideas to get your spouse into gaming. There always seem to be threads about that.
Maybe try a "Euro" game or two.

< Message edited by BoredStiff -- 10/18/2008 7:42:06 AM >

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 4:45:58 PM

SireChaos

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From: Frankfurt, Germany
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My first girlfriend wasn�t into gaming at all. She did, however, like railway trains of all kinds, and she was studying history at the time. So I showed here Railroad Tycoon (the original one - this was before part 2 came out) and Caesar II, and - BINGO! Suddenly she understood what kept be glued to the mouse and keyboard for so long. The right tool for the right job, I guess...

(in reply to BoredStiff)

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 5:26:11 PM

Phatguy

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quote:

ORIGINAL: BoredStiff

quote:

ORIGINAL: apathetic lurker

Also I have gotten her a bit interested in games but not the serious stuff like CNA. Just fluff right now as she has outright stated she failed history in HS(she's an accountant) and wouldnt know a Panther from a Sherman.

Check out BoardGameGeek.com for many ideas to get your spouse into gaming. There always seem to be threads about that.
Maybe try a "Euro" game or two.

Thats where i have been trolling lately. Seen Carcassonne, Hansa and New England. A bit not my style but look fun and family friendly. Daughter has perused the games and gives her thumbs up.. Wife willing but says she doesnt know how to play.Tried to tell her neither do we but she thinks I just wanna trick her into playing. Funny thing is she saw CNA set up and was interested in trying it but something like Hansa scares her...LOL

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 6:27:05 PM

Yogi the Great

Posts: 1948
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From: Wisconsin
Status: offline

Well Been married now 37+ years

If you count dating been together over 40

She doesn't mind the hobby, even if she thinks it is a little stange. It keeps me home and is a lot cheaper then her hobby.
Some days she can spend hours sewing while I spend hours at the computer.

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 7:03:35 PM

Perturabo

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I don't have a girlfriend.

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They should ask themselves why people who finish schools burned out due to mobbing aren't receiving high enough compensations to not seek vengeance.

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RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 7:46:19 PM

sullafelix

Posts: 1520
Joined: 1/11/2005
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Twenty seven years and four kids and 2 grandkids. She has only been upset if I spend too much time in the hobby store and she was in the car with the kids. I have a large collection of models and diecast and everyonce in awhile she'll ask " don't you have one of those ". Then I have to explain the different variants of a BF109 etc.. As far as gaming goes she has never batted an eye. I was a very bad boy until I met her so she just is glad I'm off the streets

. We've gone to gaming conventions when I was boardgaming BC. ( before computers ). Now that I don't have small hands to wreck my counter stacks I just a few years ago started buying the boardgames that I used to have. I sold my collection for $ 750 in the early 90's for a stack of computer wargames that my favorite store also carried at the time.

The only game I won't buy again is the Conquerors, Alexander the great and the Romans in eastern med.. People want $200 for that one, all the rest I've gotten for cheaper than what I paid the first time.

(in reply to Perturabo)

Post #: 25

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/18/2008 10:57:22 PM

SireChaos

Posts: 710
Joined: 8/14/2006
From: Frankfurt, Germany
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quote:

ORIGINAL: apathetic lurker

quote:

ORIGINAL: BoredStiff

quote:

ORIGINAL: apathetic lurker

Also I have gotten her a bit interested in games but not the serious stuff like CNA. Just fluff right now as she has outright stated she failed history in HS(she's an accountant) and wouldnt know a Panther from a Sherman.

Check out BoardGameGeek.com for many ideas to get your spouse into gaming. There always seem to be threads about that.
Maybe try a "Euro" game or two.

Thats where i have been trolling lately. Seen Carcassonne, Hansa and New England. A bit not my style but look fun and family friendly. Daughter has perused the games and gives her thumbs up.. Wife willing but says she doesnt know how to play.Tried to tell her neither do we but she thinks I just wanna trick her into playing. Funny thing is she saw CNA set up and was interested in trying it but something like Hansa scares her...LOL

Carcassone is great for playing with non-hardcore gamers. Same with Settlers of Catan.

(in reply to Phatguy)

Post #: 26

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/19/2008 12:27:44 AM

killroyishere

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If I spent $150 bucks a month on games I would hope someone would seek me some medical help. Even $50 a month is a bit much. Gaming should be a hobby not a habit. There's just not enough good games anymore to even warrant $50 a month let alone $150 a month. Myself I'd save that $150 a month and buy the biggest largest monitor/tv combo I could find and really enjoy gaming and football on a big screen.

(in reply to SireChaos)

Post #: 27

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/19/2008 1:14:11 AM

06 Maestro

Posts: 3989
Joined: 10/12/2005
From: Nevada, USA
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Zap

I've made her very happy recently giving her a third bathroom, and a new kitchen. Placing new marble flooring in two bathrooms and the new kitchen. This Should glaze over her eyes for a while. No matter how much I play she will only see her hero.

That's the smart way to do it. A little bit of giving can go a long way in achieving some freedom. For what those projects must have cost, you should have plenty of gaming time allowed for at least a year.

(in reply to Zap)

Post #: 28

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/19/2008 4:20:01 AM

Phatguy

Posts: 1348
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Buffalo,ny
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quote:

ORIGINAL: killroyishere

If I spent $150 bucks a month on games I would hope someone would seek me some medical help. Even $50 a month is a bit much. Gaming should be a hobby not a habit. There's just not enough good games anymore to even warrant $50 a month let alone $150 a month. Myself I'd save that $150 a month and buy the biggest largest monitor/tv combo I could find and really enjoy gaming and football on a big screen.

Thats where you are wrong....It s not a habit its a hobby.So you infer that I need medical attention? Like I said I dont spend to my limit most months but add these up if I went out right now and bought them... DAK2 200, Streets of Stalingrad 250, War in the Pacific 400,Fire in the East(plus expansions)200 and Highway to the Reich 150.... All classics but would set me back 1200 bucks.. I could go on Ebay/boardgamegeek and have them in my house by next week. I could easily spend 200 on pc/board games per month for years on end and buy only quality games....To me a big screen tv/combo would be a waste of time.. I watch about 3 hrs total tv a week. Same with the wife.More for the Rugrat.But that said to each his own.

(in reply to killroyishere)

Post #: 29

RE: Musings of an oldie gamer........ - 10/19/2008 5:44:23 AM

planner 3

Posts: 616
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OK Now its my turn (I GO U GO)...54 years with the same woman, 3 kids, 2 grandkids, was originally a model railroader (HO guage), well I retired went around the country, bought a house and land in Florida, wanted to resume hobby. NOOOO can do I cannot get right-of-way from house frau, she says why don't you look into computers, aaargh !!! I'm too old for that, says I.....Passed a comp store a few months later, nosed around, bought my first computer (win95), stumbled onto a disc for SH2 (dos), almost wore out the comp on this one, well then came Steel Panthers World at War ver 5+, tried it, liked it, play it exclusively, hell its my area in life,( WW2). Now I have three comps in house and she lets me play�SPWaW to my hearts content. An old geek am I, I am.

< Message edited by planner 3 -- 10/19/2008 5:45:54 AM >

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Musings of an oldie gamer........