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RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 2:18:08 PM   
TulliusDetritus


Posts: 5521
Joined: 4/1/2004
From: The Zone™
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Erik Rutins

Let's try to keep this on cow jokes and not politics.


She disagrees! I mean she'd love to see this thread locked!




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Post #: 31
RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 4:07:42 PM   
Lecivius


Posts: 4845
Joined: 8/5/2007
From: Denver
Status: offline 		Holy Cow!






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Post #: 32
RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 5:12:42 PM   
shunwick


Posts: 2426
Joined: 10/15/2006
Status: offline 		Schrödingerism

You have two cows.
They are both alive and dead providing you don't look.



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Post #: 33
RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 5:13:41 PM   
shunwick


Posts: 2426
Joined: 10/15/2006
Status: offline 		Accidentalism

You have two cows.
How did that happen?

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Post #: 34
RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 5:15:05 PM   
shunwick


Posts: 2426
Joined: 10/15/2006
Status: offline 		Adevism

According to legend, you have two cows.
But you don't believe it.

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Post #: 35
RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 5:36:28 PM   
Pvt_Grunt

 

Posts: 327
Joined: 2/13/2007
From: Frankston Victoria
Status: offline 		Knock knock

Who's there?

Interupting cow...

Interupti MOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


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Post #: 36
RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 8:03:12 PM   
Aurelian

 

Posts: 3916
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline 		How do you make a milkshake? Give a cow a pogo stick.

Q. How did the blonde die while drinking milk?

A. The cow sat down.


< Message edited by Aurelian -- 2/24/2014 9:06:42 PM >

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Post #: 37
RE: You have two cows. - 2/24/2014 11:44:12 PM   
Gilmer


Posts: 1452
Joined: 7/1/2011
Status: offline 		I still like mine the best. You get drunk in mine.

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(in reply to Aurelian)
Post #: 38
RE: You have two cows. - 2/28/2014 12:24:51 AM   
Zorch

 

Posts: 7087
Joined: 3/7/2010
Status: offline 		X-files-ism

You have 2 cows.
They're out there somewhere.

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Post #: 39
RE: You have two cows. - 2/28/2014 12:43:33 AM   
t001001001

 

Posts: 322
Joined: 4/30/2009
Status: offline 		You own 2 cows. They belong to you. Other than that I don't know what bidness it is of anyone else what you do w/ im.

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Post #: 40
RE: You have two cows. - 2/28/2014 7:10:52 PM   
warspite1


Posts: 41353
Joined: 2/2/2008
From: England
Status: offline 		No I don't. You must be thinking of someone else....

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Post #: 41
RE: You have two cows. - 2/28/2014 9:07:32 PM   
pmelheck1

 

Posts: 610
Joined: 4/3/2003
From: Alabama
Status: offline 		Televisionism

You sit in your living room watching farmers milking 2 cows and point out how their doing it wrong and you could do MUCH better.

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Post #: 42
RE: You have two cows. - 2/28/2014 9:13:38 PM   
pmelheck1

 

Posts: 610
Joined: 4/3/2003
From: Alabama
Status: offline 		stonerism --

You have 2 cows. Dude where's the munchies. What were we talking about again?


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Post #: 43
RE: You have two cows. - 3/1/2014 12:33:43 AM   
Aurelian

 

Posts: 3916
Joined: 2/26/2007
Status: offline 		SOVIET You have two cows. You count them and realize you have four cows. You drink more Vodka. You count the cows again and realize you have eleventy six cows. You drink even more Vodka. After a while, you realize that eleventy isn’t a real number. You count the cows again and have two cows. You open another bottle of Vodka and try to drown the loss of eleventy four cows

ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows but you don't know where they are. While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman. You break for lunch. Life is good.

< Message edited by Aurelian -- 3/1/2014 1:36:52 AM >

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Post #: 44
RE: You have two cows. - 3/1/2014 4:10:51 AM   
warspite1


Posts: 41353
Joined: 2/2/2008
From: England
Status: offline 		Nazi

You have two cows.
You invade Poland

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Post #: 45
RE: You have two cows. - 3/1/2014 4:46:32 AM   
danlongman

 

Posts: 586
Joined: 3/27/2012
From: Over the hills and far away
Status: offline 		Latvia.
You have no cow. Have no potato.
Only rock and malnurish. Is sad. And dark. Cold.
You die and suffer over.

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Post #: 46
RE: You have two cows. - 3/1/2014 7:06:27 AM   
Darkspire


Posts: 1986
Joined: 6/12/2003
From: My Own Private Hell
Status: offline 		Banishedism.
You have two cows.
Everyone dies.



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Post #: 47
RE: You have two cows. - 3/1/2014 2:03:40 PM   
Curtis Lemay


Posts: 12969
Joined: 9/17/2004
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline 		Ozarkism:

You have two cows.
Both have been trained to back up to that stump you're standing on.

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Post #: 48
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 6:20:39 AM   
Missouri_Rebel


Posts: 3065
Joined: 6/19/2006
From: Southern Missouri
Status: offline 		Wargameism

You have two cows
You teach them to play wargames
There is now three living entities in the surrounding six counties that share your passion
You accuse those cheating s.o.b. cows of teaming up on you and gaming loopholes
Steaks at 9:00, solo play to follow


quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay

Ozarkism:

You have two cows.
Both have been trained to back up to that stump you're standing on.



Silly Texan. We don't have cows round these parts. Now goats on the other hand...

And for your sin, one of my sing-songs

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxX79btQjQg

mo reb




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(in reply to Curtis Lemay)
Post #: 49
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 11:51:39 AM   
Orm


Posts: 22154
Joined: 5/3/2008
From: Sweden
Status: offline 		Nice song mo reb.

And the pictures are stunning.

But the snake gives me the shivers.

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Post #: 50
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 12:23:40 PM   
Orm


Posts: 22154
Joined: 5/3/2008
From: Sweden
Status: offline 		mo rebism:
You have two pigs.
You have a barbeque party.
You now have a lot of happy neighbours and friends.
You have one pig left for the next party.


Edit: And if I am lucky I am in the neighbourhood so I can invite myself for when it is time for the next barbeque.

< Message edited by Orm -- 3/2/2014 1:25:25 PM >

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Have a bit more patience with newbies. Of course some of them act dumb -- they're often students, for heaven's sake. - Terry Pratchett

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Post #: 51
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 1:45:11 PM   
Curtis Lemay


Posts: 12969
Joined: 9/17/2004
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Missouri_Rebel

quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay

Ozarkism:

You have two cows.
Both have been trained to back up to that stump you're standing on.



Silly Texan. We don't have cows round these parts. Now goats on the other hand...


Texan...transplanted from Arkansas.

(in reply to Missouri_Rebel)
Post #: 52
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 3:44:50 PM   
Missouri_Rebel


Posts: 3065
Joined: 6/19/2006
From: Southern Missouri
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Orm

Nice song mo reb.

And the pictures are stunning.

But the snake gives me the shivers.



I'm sure they pale in comparison to beautiful Sweden. And the snake is the elusive Timber Rattler. The area is home to 3 poisonous snakes; the seldom seen Timber Rattler, the aggressive Cottonmouth (in wet areas) and the common Copperhead.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay

Texan...transplanted from Arkansas.



Well that makes 2 Arkansans, you and Titanwarrior. 1 more and there would probably an illegal still involved.

quote:

ORIGINAL: Orm

mo rebism:
You have two pigs.
You have a barbeque party.
You now have a lot of happy neighbours and friends.
You have one pig left for the next party.


Edit: And if I am lucky I am in the neighbourhood so I can invite myself for when it is time for the next barbeque.


I like where this is going



< Message edited by Missouri_Rebel -- 3/2/2014 4:46:13 PM >

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(in reply to Curtis Lemay)
Post #: 53
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 4:28:34 PM   
Curtis Lemay


Posts: 12969
Joined: 9/17/2004
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay


quote:

ORIGINAL: Missouri_Rebel

quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay

Ozarkism:

You have two cows.
Both have been trained to back up to that stump you're standing on.



Silly Texan. We don't have cows round these parts. Now goats on the other hand...


Texan...transplanted from Arkansas.


So, in other words, I'm the Edward Snowden of deep, dark, Ozark secrets.

(in reply to Curtis Lemay)
Post #: 54
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 5:10:48 PM   
Missouri_Rebel


Posts: 3065
Joined: 6/19/2006
From: Southern Missouri
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay


quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay


quote:

ORIGINAL: Missouri_Rebel

quote:

ORIGINAL: Curtis Lemay

Ozarkism:

You have two cows.
Both have been trained to back up to that stump you're standing on.



Silly Texan. We don't have cows round these parts. Now goats on the other hand...


Texan...transplanted from Arkansas.


So, in other words, I'm the Edward Snowden of deep, dark, Ozark secrets.



Shhhhhhhh!

_____________________________

**Those who rob Peter to pay Paul can always count on the support of Paul
**A government big enough to give you everything you want is a government big enough to take from you everything you have-Gerald Ford

(in reply to Curtis Lemay)
Post #: 55
RE: You have two cows. - 3/2/2014 7:36:15 PM   
danlongman

 

Posts: 586
Joined: 3/27/2012
From: Over the hills and far away
Status: offline 		Add in newspaper in Minnesota last month after passage of legislation:
"Going out of business!! Small time cattle rancher forced out of business due to new laws!!
For Sale: Fifty Hereford cows and two gay bulls."

_____________________________

"Patriotism: Your conviction that this country is superior to all other countries because you were born in it." - George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to Missouri_Rebel)
Post #: 56
RE: You have two cows. - 3/3/2014 7:03:32 PM   
ezzler

 

Posts: 863
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline 		Consultancy

You have two cows.
You are probably something to do with dairy farming.
You should diversify into outdoor leisure and corporate events.

(in reply to danlongman)
Post #: 57
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