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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

 
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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/18/2014 6:33:50 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		Broody herr, he get carriers to pray with and he get them broken. No more geishas for you.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1141
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/18/2014 6:35:28 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		No we at war we must increase productivity. All horidays cancelled except work have harf day on Emperor's Birthday. Emperor can have whore day on his birthday. Not sure Mrs Emperor very happy about that though.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1142
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/18/2014 7:04:52 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		+++++ An Aircraft Factory, Harbin +++++

Factory Supervisor Sato: Right, I want you to start making Zeroes now
Factory Foreman: Okay, we make Zeloes
Factory Supervisor Sato: No, stupid Chinaman, Zeroes not Zeroes.
Factory Foreman: That's what I said, Zeloes, not Zeloes.



_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1143
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/18/2014 7:10:39 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		We capture Arries new secret prane detection system. Now we win war!




Attachment (1)

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1144
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/18/2014 7:14:55 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

+++++ An Aircraft Factory, Harbin +++++

Factory Supervisor Sato: Right, I want you to start making Zeroes now
Factory Foreman: Okay, we make Zeloes
Factory Supervisor Sato: No, stupid Chinaman, Zeroes not Zeroes.
Factory Foreman: That's what I said, Zeloes, not Zeloes.




Rong time ago, Japan-men ancestors come from China...but onry smart ones make it across watah.


Since war start Mandrake-san not-ah get any good herp. Japan-mens aburh to tie own shoes want to be paratrooper or fightah pirot. Nobody want to make fish-head soup or iron uniforms.

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1145
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 6:44:39 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		*************Seaside Virra, Truk Ragoon**********


Mandrake-san: <reading communication for from japan-mens high command> " Erectronic war ordah management system, a new paradigm for efficient management of the air, rand and navarh forces of Empire of Japan. " Hmmm....sound rike burr ****. Ret Mandrake-san try.*

<begins typing at erectronic keyboard> What-ah bases in South Pacific need fuerh?

<there is a pause of severarh seconds and some frashing rights> See, what-ah Mandrake-san say? Piece of crap. <printer starts to type..Mandrake-san start reading> "Row fuerh at Nadi, Koumac, Pago Pago and Canton, the isrand."

Hory crap! That-ah pretty good. Maybe Mandrake-san become more efficient? Mandrake-san wondah. <begins typing....."Amarfi Coast Vacation Rentars"


* Edited by the Editorial Board to remove scatological references and inauthentic use of pronouns.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 11/19/2014 8:31:05 PM >

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1146
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 7:14:41 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		***************Two Hours Rater*********

Mandrake-san: <typing> "How big breastesses of Betty Graburh?".............

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1147
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 8:11:12 PM   
Simonsez


Posts: 110
Joined: 12/7/2011
Status: offline 		A svelt, but curvy 36, 24. 35 when the war broke out. Not bad for a 5' 4" gal.....

_____________________________

Simonsez

It's a trap!

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1148
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 8:59:26 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		******************January 13, 1942(d)*************


Operation Tarrurah: Zuikaku-mens pump out aft media room and wine bar but forward guest toiret crog up again.
Frotation at 19, systems at 42. She stirr pretty fast but go srow so watah not-ah sprash around so much. Detached today for Rabaurh with 5 DD's and anothah 3 DD ASW group. Arried subs arr ovah prace. Japan-mens roose strategic, operationarh, tacticarh surprise and Emperor even find out about gift card for birthday.



(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1149
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 9:05:25 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Fuso get compretery F'usoed: Rookouts having smoke so Fuso accidnetarry run into Arried torpedo which accidentarry brow up aftah accidentarry rereaased from Arried-mens submarine.

Sub attack near Rennell Island at 111,142

Japanese Ships
BB Fuso, Torpedo hits 1
DD Yudachi
DD Murasame
DD Suzukaze
DD Kawakaze

Allied Ships
SS Trout

SS Trout accidentarry launches 6 torpedoes at BB Fuso
Trout diving deep ....
DD Suzukaze fails to find sub and abandons search

Submarine named aftah rittah tiny fish with brain size of grain of rice but stir pretty hard to catch. Fuso not-ah sink but have to be rifted out of watah to fix. Arried-mens not-ah read memo about crappy torpedoes.

This-ah second BB that take one up chuff.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 11/19/2014 10:21:06 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1150
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 9:24:29 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Ashigara try to brow up Arried-mens ship probabry grounded in tiny rittah harbor. Instead brow up 12 taro prants and scare Jesus out of onry Cathoric priest on isrand.

Night Naval bombardment of Efate at 120,154

Japanese Ships
CA Ashigara
DD Susuki
DD Hasu
DD Sanae
DD Hatsushima

Port hits 12
Port supply hits 4

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1151
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 9:43:30 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		China: Aftah franking move North of Changsha fairh, Japan-mens concentrate on singurh corps in woods NE of Changsha.
6 China-mens corps on road so Japan-mens try to find easiah way in.

Ground combat at 82,51 (near Changsha)

Japanese Shock attack

Attacking force 31612 troops, 244 guns, 28 vehicles, Assault Value = 949

Defending force 11376 troops, 39 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 353

Japanese adjusted assault: 1173

Allied adjusted defense: 117

Japanese assault odds: 10 to 1

Combat modifiers
Defender: terrain(+), leaders(+), experience(-)
Attacker: shock(+), leaders(+)

Japanese ground losses:
2306 casualties reported
Squads: 3 destroyed, 80 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 10 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 17 disabled
Guns lost 18 (3 destroyed, 15 disabled)

Allied ground losses:
6609 casualties reported
Squads: 124 destroyed, 31 disabled
Non Combat: 191 destroyed, 21 disabled
Engineers: 4 destroyed, 7 disabled
Guns lost 12 (4 destroyed, 8 disabled)
Units retreated 1

Defeated Allied Units Retreating!

Assaulting units:
39th Division
40th Division
18th Ind.Mixed Brigade

Defending units:
99th Chinese Corps


< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 11/19/2014 10:44:38 PM >

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1152
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 10:00:02 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		**************Pranning**************

Akagi ready and Hiryu not-ah get any worse (12% system) so operation go ahead upon arrival of Akagi in about 4 d. In mean time Japan-mens try to capture Noumea and Ruganvirre to get rid of immensery annoying search pranes. Seasick city boys go ashore at Koumac.
Japan-mens try rearry hard not-ah run into any more torpedoes.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1153
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 10:33:26 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Crappy weathah were Mandrake-san is. Pretty sure not-ah get above 74 today.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1154
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/19/2014 10:35:54 PM   
zuluhour


Posts: 5244
Joined: 1/20/2011
From: Maryland
Status: offline 		no sympathy!

oh yeah: "WOO WOOOOOOOOOO WOO WOOOOOOOOOOOO




Attachment (1)

< Message edited by zuluhour -- 11/20/2014 1:25:59 AM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1155
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/20/2014 6:54:08 AM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		We capture this cine reer at Singers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JX9h5Vk1rO0#t=43

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to zuluhour)
Post #: 1156
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/20/2014 6:56:28 AM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		+++++ An Aircraft Factory, Harbin +++++

Factory Foreman: Sir, we built filst Zelo

Supervisor Sato: No, stupid Chinaman, Zeroes not Zeroes. Rearn to speak properry.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1157
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 4:19:47 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

We capture this cine reer at Singers: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JX9h5Vk1rO0#t=43



Evidentarry someone at BBC previousry work for Freet Air Arm.

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1158
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 4:21:10 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

+++++ An Aircraft Factory, Harbin +++++

Factory Foreman: Sir, we built filst Zelo

Supervisor Sato: No, stupid Chinaman, Zeroes not Zeroes. Rearn to speak properry.



<kitchen herp entah room>


Hop Sing: OK, who likey flied lice?




EDIT: Spelled "likey" wrong.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 11/21/2014 5:27:04 PM >

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1159
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 4:25:47 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Editrix Note:

The Board has nearly reached its limit of tolerance for puerile and frankly racist characterizations in this narrative. Neither are these missives accurate to the sentiments at the time. Further displays will NOT be tolerated.

Also of concern are the glib and offensive characterizations of members of the bar.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1160
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 4:29:43 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

I would not like them here or there.
I would not like them anywhere.





< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 11/21/2014 5:34:00 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1161
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 4:59:45 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Editrix Note:

The Board has nearly reached its limit of tolerance for puerile and frankly racist characterizations in this narrative. Neither are these missives accurate to the sentiments at the time. Further displays will NOT be tolerated.

Also of concern are the glib and offensive characterizations of members of the bar.


Oh borrocks, now we in foh it.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1162
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 5:42:37 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Editrix Note:

The Board has nearly reached its limit of tolerance for puerile and frankly racist characterizations in this narrative. Neither are these missives accurate to the sentiments at the time. Further displays will NOT be tolerated.

Also of concern are the glib and offensive characterizations of members of the bar.


Oh borrocks, now we in foh it.



Probabry Editrix China-womans so get panties in bunch. China-womans much-ah more irritaburh than Japan-womans.

Probaby good idea if Admirarhs not say where at so Arried-mens not-ah send Force Ten from Navarone aftah us.

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1163
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 5:57:19 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Mandrake-san find out one of carriers in KB onry have 32 sorties reft so have to send furr KB back to Rabaurh to wait for Akagi and pick up bombs and aviation gasorine and pee botturhs for pirots. Maybe Rabaurh have torpedoes too? Zuikaku go back to Rabaurh with some DD's at srow speed. Fuso go back to Rabaurh.

Seasick city boys go ahead to New and Improved Caredonia. Rest of Rord Howe randing force retire to NE to get away from damn Arried-mens submarines.

Kimura Det. embarking at Rabaurh today. Probabry go to Suva.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1164
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 6:02:43 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		************XXXXXX XXXXX, XXXX XXXXXX. January 14, 1942(d)***********

Mandrake-san: If Japan-mens see anyone who rook rike Gregory Peck, Mandrake-san want to know right away.

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1165
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 6:22:44 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		XXXXXX-XXXXX-XXXXX-.....-xxxxx

Prior-San Keep sharp rook out for David Niven too.

< Message edited by sprior -- 11/21/2014 7:24:10 PM >

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1166
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 6:28:37 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		Broody herr, Singapore hoters no trust Ja-pan sairor-men





Attachment (1)

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1167
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 7:15:42 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

Broody herr, Singapore hoters no trust Ja-pan sairor-men







Prace must be pretty crowded if two peopurh have to sreep in same room. Very charitaburh of street girhs.

What-ah brankets and sheets rike in prace rike that?

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1168
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 7:45:42 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
What-ah brankets and sheets rike in prace rike that?


Onry prace we been where sheets are harder than head board.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 1169
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 11/21/2014 8:08:36 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
What-ah brankets and sheets rike in prace rike that?


Onry prace we been where sheets are harder than head board.



Sound rike Japan-mens have too many sea-mens in Singapores.


Perhaps send some to Java-jima?

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 11/21/2014 9:11:40 PM >

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 1170
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