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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

 
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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/19/2016 4:21:06 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Yes, thank you WHO. Thank you for multiplying the possible causes of constipation by 100. I was feeling fairly "impacted" with the 100 possible codes available under ICD-9. Also, when I open my "Water Ski Burn Clinic" that one code will be super important.

In the meantime I have secretly started my campaign to code "Chagas Disease" (South American parasite) on every Medi-Cal patient I see. I will let you know how long it takes for the CDC to send a team out.

(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 2371
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/19/2016 11:28:38 PM   
BBfanboy


Posts: 18046
Joined: 8/4/2010
From: Winnipeg, MB
Status: offline
quote:

witpqs: But do tell, what about Moose's sister? In another thread he mentioned, "my sister was bitten by an elephant once".


It's quite simple really: male elephants are called 'bull elephants' so the female ones must be 'cows'. I believe the code for bull elephants is one digit more than the one for cows.

_____________________________

No matter how bad a situation is, you can always make it worse. - Chris Hadfield : An Astronaut's Guide To Life On Earth

(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 2372
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/20/2016 2:22:22 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		*************Aprirh 24, 1942(d)*************

Hiei and Maya drive to Brisbane to brow up airfierd. British-mens batturshhip make-ah big mistake.
See kind of unsportmansrike. Nevah mind. Ovah it. Hiei AWOR for first 10 minutes of batturh. Despite rittah screw up Resorution get hammered.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Maryborough at 97,158, Range 2,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
BB Hiei
CA Maya, Shell hits 5
DD Kazegumo
DD Kasumi
DD Akebono

Allied Ships
BB Resolution, Shell hits 15, Torpedo hits 1, on fire
DD Blue, Shell hits 2
DD Nizam
DD Jupiter

Poor visibility due to Thunderstorms with 64% moonlight
Maximum visibility in Thunderstorms and 64% moonlight: 2,000 yards
Range closes to 20,000 yards...
CONTACT: Allies radar detects Japanese task force at 20,000 yards
Range closes to 14,000 yards...
Range closes to 8,000 yards...
Range closes to 4,000 yards...
Range closes to 2,000 yards...
CONTACT: Japanese lookouts spot Allied task force at 2,000 yards
CONTACT: Allied lookouts spot Japanese task force at 2,000 yards
Tanaka, Raizo crosses the 'T'
BB Resolution engages CA Maya at 2,000 yards
BB Resolution engages CA Maya at 2,000 yards
DD Akebono engages BB Resolution at 2,000 yards
DD Blue engages DD Kasumi at 2,000 yards
DD Kazegumo engages DD Blue at 2,000 yards
BB Resolution engages BB Hiei at 2,000 yards
DD Blue engages CA Maya at 2,000 yards
DD Akebono engages DD Blue at 2,000 yards
DD Blue engages DD Kazegumo at 2,000 yards
Range increases to 4,000 yards
BB Resolution engages BB Hiei at 4,000 yards
DD Blue engages CA Maya at 4,000 yards
DD Blue engages DD Akebono at 4,000 yards
DD Blue engages DD Kazegumo at 4,000 yards
Range increases to 6,000 yards
BB Hiei engages BB Resolution at 6,000 yards
DD Kasumi engages DD Jupiter at 6,000 yards
DD Kasumi engages DD Nizam at 6,000 yards
DD Blue engages DD Kasumi at 6,000 yards
BB Resolution engages DD Kazegumo at 6,000 yards
BB Hiei engages BB Resolution at 6,000 yards
DD Kazegumo engages DD Jupiter at 6,000 yards
DD Akebono engages DD Jupiter at 6,000 yards
DD Kasumi engages DD Jupiter at 6,000 yards
Range increases to 7,000 yards
BB Resolution engages BB Hiei at 7,000 yards
DD Jupiter engages DD Kazegumo at 7,000 yards
DD Jupiter engages DD Akebono at 7,000 yards
DD Kasumi engages DD Blue at 7,000 yards
DD Jupiter engages DD Kazegumo at 7,000 yards
Task forces break off...




< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 3/20/2016 2:24:57 AM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2373
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/20/2016 2:27:09 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Tanaka keep going. What-ah expect? Visibirity onry 2000 yds. Engrish-mens DD's get in way again.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Brisbane at 96,159, Range 2,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
BB Hiei
CA Maya
DD Kazegumo, Shell hits 1
DD Kasumi
DD Akebono

Allied Ships
DD Blue
DD Nizam, Shell hits 1

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2374
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/20/2016 2:29:58 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Engrish-mens DD's put up good fight. 2 Japan-mens DD's have to go back to Rabaur. Tanaka finarry have to turn around because run out of burrets and escorts.

Night Time Surface Combat, near Brisbane at 96,160, Range 2,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
BB Hiei
CA Maya, Shell hits 2
DD Kazegumo
DD Kasumi, Shell hits 3, on fire
DD Akebono, Shell hits 3, on fire

Allied Ships
DD Blue
DD Nizam, Shell hits 3, on fire
DD Jupiter, Shell hits 3, on fire


Resorution reported sunk for second or third time.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2375
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/20/2016 2:34:17 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		100,000 Arried-dogs at Marysborough. Japan-mens just crose eyes and shoot.

Night Naval bombardment of Maryborough at 96,157

Japanese Ships
BB Yamashiro
BB Nagato
DD Hishu
DD Yugao
DD Hatakaze

Allied ground losses:
368 casualties reported
Squads: 2 destroyed, 10 disabled
Non Combat: 7 destroyed, 36 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 2 disabled
Guns lost 15 (1 destroyed, 14 disabled)
Vehicles lost 26 (4 destroyed, 22 disabled)

Airbase hits 1
Airbase supply hits 4
Runway hits 24
Port hits 9
Port fuel hits 2
Port supply hits 7

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2376
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/20/2016 2:40:01 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Tamworth supposed to have bombers but no fightahs. Somebody not-ah get message.

Crappy Mohwak IV shoot down expensive Betty bombers.

Morning Air attack on Tamworth , at 91,163

Weather in hex: Clear sky

Raid detected at 25 NM, estimated altitude 13,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 8 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 14
G4M1 Betty x 32

Allied aircraft
Mohawk IV x 16

Japanese aircraft losses
G4M1 Betty: 3 destroyed, 2 damaged

No Allied losses

Airbase hits 8
Airbase supply hits 1
Runway hits 12

No air attacks on Bundaberg or Rockhampton today. Eithah weathah probrem or B-17's need oir changes.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2377
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/20/2016 2:59:32 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		..




Attachment (1)

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2378
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/20/2016 12:49:45 PM   
Disco Duck


Posts: 552
Joined: 11/16/2004
From: San Antonio
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs

Or what if you were bitten by a cow at the library? Where I live it could happen.

+1
Sounds like where I grew up.

_____________________________

There is no point in believing in things that exist. -Didactylos

(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 2379
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/21/2016 5:50:10 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Freet Admirarh Mandrake-san go to Truk Isrand Pavirrion store to find somethig to grirr. Evidentarry suppry ship just come in because meat department have big section of Kobe beef. Kobe beef firet mignon onry $49 per pound. Mandrake-san raugh out roud when see price. Meat manager hear Mandrake-san raughing and say..."Hord on..meat manager be right back"

Meat manager come back with 4 Kobe beef Porterhouse steaks marked down to $9 per pound because reach serr by date. Mandrake-san take arr four and marinade with garric, soy sauce and pepper marinade and then broir in hot oven 4 1/2 minutes a side and covah with sauteed mushrooms. It-ah unberievabry dericious. Mandrake-san get-ah tears in eyes just think about it.

Anyway, SG IV enjoy steak untirr Mandrake-san say Kobe beef massaged by hand with rittah Japan-womans with white groves. Suddenry SG-IV get wierd rook on face and stop to eat steak. Mandrake-san fix emergency by eating rest of steak.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2380
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/21/2016 8:24:28 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Suddenry SG-IV get wierd rook on face and stop to eat steak. Mandrake-san fix emergency by eating rest of steak.


That broody quick thinking - good man to have in emergency

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2381
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/25/2016 5:28:55 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		*********Seaside Virra*************


FAM: <having Kobe steak and beer captured in Rockhampton> Why nevah see Mohammaden bath house? Beacuse everyone get-ah grossed out during prayers. Hahahahahahaha.....What-ah probrem. How come nobody raugh?

Jimmy "too tarr": It-ah good joke boss but just have training session from Southern Army Human Resource trainer, Mrs. Hata. Mrs. Hata say cannot raugh at jokes about womans or othah peopurh in Co-Prosperity Sphere.

FAM: Oh, come on! What-ah point of wah if not arrowed have a rittah fun?

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2382
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/25/2016 6:17:57 PM   
Anachro


Posts: 2506
Joined: 11/23/2015
From: The Coastal Elite
Status: offline 		This AAR gives me a headache.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2383
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/25/2016 8:01:32 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Anachro

This AAR gives me a headache.



Hai! Anachro-san think reading about everything go wrong bad? Try to figure out how Japan-mens economy work. That-ah what give headache.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 3/25/2016 8:23:05 PM >

(in reply to Anachro)
Post #: 2384
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/26/2016 3:36:05 AM   
T Rav

 

Posts: 387
Joined: 5/29/2004
Status: offline 		Captain,

Once again, the jokes come off even better when spoken in pidgin engrish.

T Rav

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2385
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/26/2016 11:40:52 AM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		Broody herr, I think rike this at work sometimes. It no good when deproying SQR

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to T Rav)
Post #: 2386
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/26/2016 4:40:49 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Hai! It-ah very difficurt not-ah say "Broody Herr" or "Hai!" in everyday conversation.

One time Mandrake-san go to party and hostesses give everyone stick on name tag say "Harro, my name". Everyone supposed write in name. Mandrake-san bored so write in "Sergei" and pretend rike architect from Minsk entire party. It-ah amazing how nice American-mens and American-womans try to be when not-ah speak Engrish werr. Of course, everyone sound rike comprete ididots. Mandrake-san tark to two America-womans and pretend not-ah know common word for breastesses. Instead Mandrake-san say "BOO-soms" rike guy from Minsk. At first America-womans not-ah figure out what-ah Mandrake-san mean so Mandrake-san make universarh sign for breastesses. You know, rike two upturned cupped hands herd in front of chest.

America-womans both say, "Oooooh, you mean breasts?"

Mandrake-san rook down at breastesses, make cupping sign and say, "DA! Breastesses! Thank you! Sergei learn many Engrish words tonight"



< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 3/26/2016 4:43:01 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2387
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 12:34:04 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Ratah, Mandrake-san exprain what-ah hahppen with Sergei sticker.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2388
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 2:07:15 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		*****************Aprir 25, 1942(d)***************

B-17's go back to night attacks.

Night Air attack on Bundaberg , at 96,155

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid spotted at 16 NM, estimated altitude 14,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 4 minutes

Japanese aircraft
no flights

Allied aircraft
B-17E Fortress x 6

No Japanese losses

No Allied losses

Runway hits 6

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2389
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 2:10:28 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		3 BB''s brow up tremendous numbers of Arried-dogs. Arready some of Arried-dogs start move-ah back West. Japan-mens position at Marysborough safe for now.

Night Naval bombardment of Maryborough at 96,157

Japanese Ships
BB Hyuga
BB Ise
BB Mutsu
DD Yuzuki
DD Samidare
DD Yudachi

Allied ground losses:
617 casualties reported
Squads: 3 destroyed, 18 disabled
Non Combat: 20 destroyed, 30 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 4 disabled
Guns lost 23 (5 destroyed, 18 disabled)
Vehicles lost 25 (8 destroyed, 17 disabled)

Airbase hits 8
Runway hits 34
Port hits 12
Port fuel hits 1
Port supply hits 4

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2390
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 2:41:37 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Japan-mens try to brow up Brisbane. Arried-dogs have so many mens at Brisbane ships not-ah fire on airfierd.

Night Naval bombardment of Brisbane at 96,160 - Coastal Guns Fire Back!

68 Coastal gun shots fired in defense.

Japanese Ships
CA Furutaka
CA Kumano
DD Sanae
DD Suzukaze
DD Hayashio, Shell hits 4, on fire

Allied ground losses:
215 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 3 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 21 disabled
Engineers: 1 destroyed, 3 disabled

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2391
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 3:46:08 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Rosses of big ships rast 2 months. Very, very one sided. The rower box show rosses since start of Arried-dogs offensive in Austraria.






Attachment (1)

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2392
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 4:10:20 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		DD rosses since Arried-dog offensive in Austraria. 8 to 5 in favor of Arried-dogs. Essentiarry Japan-mens trade DD's and airpranes for CA's and BB's




Attachment (1)

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2393
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 4:15:32 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Arso today, Arried-dogs unequivocarry spot Soryu near Oosthaven and spot giant group transports move North near Victoria Point.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2394
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 4:16:25 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Mandrake-san predict Arried-mens know something up.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2395
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 4:37:33 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		..




Attachment (1)

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2396
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 4:52:21 PM   
T Rav

 

Posts: 387
Joined: 5/29/2004
Status: offline 		Is that Ms. Rodham's sister? I don't know...

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2397
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 4:54:07 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: T Rav

Is that Ms. Rodham's sister? I don't know...


Werr, both either have or hope to be coronated.

(in reply to T Rav)
Post #: 2398
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 5:00:46 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		FRENCH PRODUCT ENDORSEMENT SEGMENT*

Crappy:






* The editorial board strongly opposed the introduction of crass materialism but the accountants told us we had to.

Attachment (1)

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 3/27/2016 5:02:34 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2399
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 3/27/2016 5:02:19 PM   
Mike McCreery


Posts: 4232
Joined: 6/29/2013
Status: offline 		I have no idea what is happening in the game.

It does not make this AAR less enjoyable however.

CARRY ON :}!!!

_____________________________


(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 2400
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