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Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 1:06:25 AM   
Runsilentrundeep


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From: Tulsa Oklahoma USA but still a Yankee
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In the ongoing debate on whether this is a game or a simulation I send the following list:


Top Ten Ways to make this game more Realistic:

10) IJA/IJN player’s interface should be in Japanese.
9) Fixing ASW, All ASW combat should be simulated in the bathtub using M-80’s in soda cans.
8) Turns should be more detailed, 5 minutes, 10 minutes or 15 minutes of game time.
7) In order to placate Allied Fanboys, they will dictate where the IJN/IJA can invade turn 1, and the only port strike allowed is one on Goodenough Island.
6) To placate IJA/IJN fanboys ASW patrols will only be allowed by PT boats, Nells and Bettys will not only be able to have Torps at extended range but also cruise missles.
5) To better simulate the Monsoon season, every 5 minutes pour a gallon of water over yourself.
4) The US Navy is dry boys, so put down the Beer and start eating the ice-cream (unless of course you know how to make Torpedo Juice). Oh yeah no women too.
3) The game must be downloaded and played on EINAC or UNIVAC.
2) The smoking lamp is lit, just as long as you are not on the Taiho.
1) If the Allied player loses they must behead themselves with a Ginsu Knife, if the IJN/IJA player loses they put their heads in the microwave.
Post #: 1
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 2:37:07 AM   
Titanwarrior89


Posts: 3283
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From: arkansas
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I like number 7.
quote:

ORIGINAL: Runsilentrundeep

In the ongoing debate on whether this is a game or a simulation I send the following list:


Top Ten Ways to make this game more Realistic:

10) IJA/IJN player’s interface should be in Japanese.
9) Fixing ASW, All ASW combat should be simulated in the bathtub using M-80’s in soda cans.
8) Turns should be more detailed, 5 minutes, 10 minutes or 15 minutes of game time.
7) In order to placate Allied Fanboys, they will dictate where the IJN/IJA can invade turn 1, and the only port strike allowed is one on Goodenough Island.
6) To placate IJA/IJN fanboys ASW patrols will only be allowed by PT boats, Nells and Bettys will not only be able to have Torps at extended range but also cruise missles.
5) To better simulate the Monsoon season, every 5 minutes pour a gallon of water over yourself.
4) The US Navy is dry boys, so put down the Beer and start eating the ice-cream (unless of course you know how to make Torpedo Juice). Oh yeah no women too.
3) The game must be downloaded and played on EINAC or UNIVAC.
2) The smoking lamp is lit, just as long as you are not on the Taiho.
1) If the Allied player loses they must behead themselves with a Ginsu Knife, if the IJN/IJA player loses they put their heads in the microwave.




_____________________________

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Post #: 2
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 2:37:26 AM   
Halsey

 

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Only 10?

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RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 5:52:59 PM   
freeboy

 

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omglmao, crying now.. especially #5

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Post #: 4
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 5:59:28 PM   
treespider


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From: Edgewater, MD
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I want the ability to produce all of the individual nuts and bolts used for ship production...And if production lags why can't i change the line supervisor?

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Post #: 5
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 6:05:49 PM   
Nikademus


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#4 proves that the author is most certainly a wine-cooler fanboy which, as everyone knows, is not a REAL alcholic beverage.






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RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 6:26:44 PM   
rtrapasso


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

#4 proves that the author is most certainly a wine-cooler fanboy which, as everyone knows, is not a REAL alcholic beverage.







Strangeness: last night my wife was drinking her Seagram's "wine cooler" when she actually sat down and read the label. It never really says "wine cooler" anywhere, but the states in the fine print that it is actually "flavored beer"!

This may cause her to stop drinking this, as she says she doesn't like beer (despite the fact that she always like this particular beverage before...)

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RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 6:35:01 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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quote:

1) If the Allied player loses they must behead themselves with a Ginsu Knife, if the IJN/IJA player loses they put their heads in the microwave.


If I put my head in the microwave but still have my aluminum foil hat on will that still work?

As for the Goodenough Island opening, I wouldn't minimize it. It does have some strategic opportunities.

(in reply to rtrapasso)
Post #: 8
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 6:42:30 PM   
rtrapasso


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quote:

If I put my head in the microwave but still have my aluminum foil hat on will that still work?


Putting your head in the microwave isn't the bad part, but closing the door completely is a real b1tch!



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Post #: 9
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 7:04:03 PM   
MM3 Steam Turbine


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Runsilentrundeep

In the ongoing debate on whether this is a game or a simulation I send the following list:



This is the most common thread on any wargame ever released for play. I have heard the same type of criticisms about every game I have played over the years. TOAW, Campaign Series and others (PACWAR).

No matter the game there is always that segment that thinks it should be this way and not that.

Note to wargame community.....there is no perfect historical simulation/game anywhere in the world and there never will be.

(in reply to Runsilentrundeep)
Post #: 10
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 8:45:22 PM   
RUPD3658


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From: East Brunswick, NJ
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Runsilentrundeep

Nells and Bettys will not only be able to have Torps at extended range but also cruise missles.



If they work anything like the OKHAs that are all ready in the game I will keep my torpedoes.


_____________________________

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"No plan survives contact with the enemy." - Field Marshall Helmuth von Moltke


(in reply to Runsilentrundeep)
Post #: 11
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 10:53:16 PM   
Runsilentrundeep


Posts: 86
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From: Tulsa Oklahoma USA but still a Yankee
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Nikademus

#4 proves that the author is most certainly a wine-cooler fanboy which, as everyone knows, is not a REAL alcholic beverage.







These are fighting words I will have it known that:
1) The only time I consume Wine Coolers is when I pour them on my Ice Cream.
2) As far as Beer, I lived in Milwaukee most of my life, 'nuff said.

(in reply to Nikademus)
Post #: 12
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/12/2005 11:58:13 PM   
Nikademus


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From: Alien spacecraft
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Runsilentrundeep


These are fighting words I will have it known that:
1) The only time I consume Wine Coolers is when I pour them on my Ice Cream.
2) As far as Beer, I lived in Milwaukee most of my life, 'nuff said.



That explains it all right. Milwaukee.....home town of battered cruisers with ugly casemates and really really bad beer. (Old Milwaukee....otherwise known as pee in a can)



Pressssent.....Projectile Vomit!













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Post #: 13
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/13/2005 12:14:13 AM   
Feinder


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Goodenaugh Island strike is only permissible if IJN bombers are not allowed to set "Port Attack" as a secondary mission.

-F-

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Post #: 14
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/13/2005 2:39:28 AM   
Mr.Frag


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From: Purgatory
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quote:

(Old Milwaukee....otherwise known as pee in a can)


Lets not get too subjective here, ALL American beer is known as pee in a can ... the only difference between the brands is how long the toilet went unflushed before bottling.

(in reply to Nikademus)
Post #: 15
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/13/2005 3:33:13 AM   
freeboy

 

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From: Colorado
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while we do see pee in a can, many smaller companies sell better than Canadian pee in a can.. and some even sell good bear.. see Red HOOk black stout, Road Dog porter, and many other fine local bears...
What does canada offer save lots of great fishing? oh ye thats right high double trouble taxes on purchases!

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Post #: 16
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/13/2005 5:20:59 AM   
Rob322

 

Posts: 578
Joined: 8/16/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MM3 Steam Turbine


quote:

ORIGINAL: Runsilentrundeep

In the ongoing debate on whether this is a game or a simulation I send the following list:



This is the most common thread on any wargame ever released for play. I have heard the same type of criticisms about every game I have played over the years. TOAW, Campaign Series and others (PACWAR).

No matter the game there is always that segment that thinks it should be this way and not that.

Note to wargame community.....there is no perfect historical simulation/game anywhere in the world and there never will be.



Ahhh, this thread was intended as humor I hope!

(in reply to MM3 Steam Turbine)
Post #: 17
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/13/2005 10:13:47 PM   
crsutton


Posts: 9590
Joined: 12/6/2002
From: Maryland
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Two words. "Real Time"

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Post #: 18
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/13/2005 10:27:43 PM   
rtrapasso


Posts: 22653
Joined: 9/3/2002
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quote:

ORIGINAL: crsutton

Two words. "Real Time"



Well, the rate i am going, it's going to take 4+ years to finish the game.

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Post #: 19
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/13/2005 10:33:27 PM   
Reverberate

 

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quote:

ORIGINAL: crsutton

Two words. "Real Time"

Five words. "Real Time with Bill Maher". (HBO, Friday's at 11PM).

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Post #: 20
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/14/2005 1:03:54 AM   
freeboy

 

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From: Colorado
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change bath tub to pool.. using radio controlled boats and ok, this is silly

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Post #: 21
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 7:21:13 AM   
scout1


Posts: 2899
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From: South Bend, In
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quote:

Lets not get too subjective here, ALL American beer is known as pee in a can ... the only difference between the brands is how long the toilet went unflushed before bottling.


As opposed to the fine Canook beers ?

European (mainland) beer is the only way to go.

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Post #: 22
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 7:40:47 AM   
bradfordkay

 

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I've sampled my way through the pubs of England and Belgium, and I'll stand some of the NW Microbrews against the best of them. I'm sure that there's some other brewpubs scattered across the US that do a great job as well. It's the craft brewers who are creating the good stuff.

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fair winds,
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Post #: 23
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 5:16:01 PM   
Nikademus


Posts: 25684
Joined: 5/27/2000
From: Alien spacecraft
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bah. 'Nightwatch' ale by Maritime Pacific
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mr.Frag

quote:

(Old Milwaukee....otherwise known as pee in a can)


Lets not get too subjective here, ALL American beer is known as pee in a can ... the only difference between the brands is how long the toilet went unflushed before bottling.



_____________________________


(in reply to Mr.Frag)
Post #: 24
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 5:35:44 PM   
sabreman1966mcs

 

Posts: 180
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quote:

ORIGINAL: scout1


European (mainland) beer is the only way to go.



Errr what's wrong with fine old traditional British beers? there are some excellent ones that far outrank those European lagers, such as Brains bitter or Brains SA (aka Skull Attack (for the effect it has the following day! )) both from an independant brewery in Cardiff. The famous Newcastle Brown Ale, from just down the road from me There are a host of other excellent independant breweries producing world class ales over here.

Saying all that, I still love a good bottle of Becks

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Post #: 25
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 6:30:39 PM   
Nikademus


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Guiness!

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RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 8:56:07 PM   
freeboy

 

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quote:

I've sampled my way through the pubs of England and Belgium, and I'll stand some of the NW Microbrews against the best of them. I'm sure that there's some other brewpubs scattered across the US that do a great job as well. It's the craft brewers who are creating the good stuff.

I appreciate full body flaver without a bitter taste, served cool, not cold... I know friends over there who drink beer warm?? I also apreciate that Mr Frag is a Canadian who cannot distinguish between warm piss and beer, begs the ?, how much piss have you been drinking lately?

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Post #: 27
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 9:06:52 PM   
rtrapasso


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quote:

ORIGINAL: freeboy

quote:

I've sampled my way through the pubs of England and Belgium, and I'll stand some of the NW Microbrews against the best of them. I'm sure that there's some other brewpubs scattered across the US that do a great job as well. It's the craft brewers who are creating the good stuff.

I appreciate full body flaver without a bitter taste, served cool, not cold... I know friends over there who drink beer warm?? I also apreciate that Mr Frag is a Canadian who cannot distinguish between warm piss and beer, begs the ?, how much piss have you been drinking lately?



And thus began the Great Toronto - Colorado War ...

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RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 9:12:36 PM   
freeboy

 

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nothing but love for the Fraginator!

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Post #: 29
RE: Top 10 ways to make this game more realistic. - 4/15/2005 9:27:56 PM   
fabertong


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Ok, so apart from beer what would make WITP more realistic?
1. cotes du rhone
2. macon village
3. Chalone Chardonnay
4. Cloudy Bay Sauvignon Blanc
5. Freemark Abbey Cab. Sauv.
6. Coldstream Hills Pinot Noir
7. Tortilla chips
8. Full frontal nudity
9. I seem to be getting distracted..................

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Post #: 30
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