Kwik E Mart
Posts: 2447
Joined: 7/22/2004 Status: offline
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quote:
ORIGINAL: JWE quote:
ORIGINAL: Nikademus I never took John for a coffee snob......I thought that was what Seattle pukes were. Oh, no, I didn't mean that really; well maybe I did, a little. I mean, like the Coast is pretty well set up. There's SoCal where you get your tan, do some surfing, do some boat racing where the weather's sweet, and get the best Thai food and Carnitas. Then there's NoCal where you lose your tan, can't surf, but the boat racing is a skoosh more intense; the sushi's good, but SoCal has better tuna, NoCal has better crab; but the wine is what makes it. If it weren't for Napa/Sonoma, we would have booted NoCal out of the Union ages ago. Then there's this strip of trees and flowers and chirping birds, and it's great to visit and hike in; very pretty. Part of this is called Oregon, and that's where a lot of the old-timey High Times hippies moved to, so it's a big time canabis producer. Unfortunately, them old-timey hippies were too drugged out to pay attention to simple things like growth cycles and optimal climactic conditions, so while Oregon may grow the most dope, it is really pathetic stuff (compare, cf., one toke off a Michuacan bud splif; ok, ok, I prefer Oaxacan, but WTH). Nice place, but pretty sub-par smoke. And just above that strip is another one called Washington. Don't really know why it's there, except perhaps as an appendage to the People's Republic of British Columbia. Can't get a tan, no surf; sailing is pretty good, except when you hit a submerged tree trunk. Town is kinda jumping, but it jumps with things like "Puppetry of The Penis" (trust me, this is real. I actually lost a bet with my she-unit and took her and her friend to the show - gave them thier tickest and took them right to the door - then I went walkies to a bar - Hey, I know my English). So to my simple mind, these Washingtonians need to do something that differentiates them from the Socialists next door, so ... Hey! . What if we make coffee (of which the closest bean is perhaps 7,000 km away) and do it in a fake French/demi-espresso style and advertise the crap out of it? Doesn't matter if it tastes like burnt, fermented, owl dung, it's an "American Regional" thing and if you don't like it you are probably a rascist (or a sexist, or a homophobe, or someone who doesn't like trees), and so the steaming pile of burnt bat fewmets became an American icon ... go figure.. Now I ain't no coffee snob, but a well roasted Guatamala peaberry tastes pretty good. Likewise, there's some pretty serious Turkish roasts of Ethiopian Highlands. When the Saudis wish to impress, they do a slow roast of an Ethiop Yirgacheffe. Strength is in the concentration of the flavor, not how badly burnt the beans are. There is an art to roasting coffee beans. Some cultures , who appreciate the thing, get it right. Other cultures, just suck up to their local advertiising pukes and drink piss because they are told they are supposed to like it. Does that make me a coffee snob ?? actually, you can surf in NoCal (Capitola, Santa Cruz, Half Moon Bay)...you just need to make sure you have a wet or dry suit......agree the wines are nice...seattle's best is best used as an anti-freeze additive...
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Kirk Lazarus: I know who I am. I'm the dude playin' the dude, disguised as another dude! Ron Swanson: Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets.
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