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RE: Hearts and Minds

 
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RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/15/2012 10:43:16 PM   
Crackaces


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake


quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs

quote:

ORIGINAL: Crackaces

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

Yes, it's a river that cuts it off from the mainland. The main thing it does is unhinge any defence based around Mandalay.


Also NY59Giants has remarked in my AAR that Ramree Island is a supply Gateway to all of Burma. Take and build a port here and supply is accomplished. I have not done this so I cannot verify, but it makes sense.

Yes it is a supply gateway, but not unbridled. First off it's a lousy port so you have to build build build. Second, the first hex is a no-road jungle crossing. After that you get to a poor road (bright red). If you hold Prome the road goes there. If not, it's another no-road jungle crossing to get to the plain.


What about Moulmein or the one further South? Seems to me you want something with an airfield pronto because there are half a dozen good sized air bases in range.



There are two constraints on my posting .. one the objective is in the context of supplying an offense on Prome -> Rangoon .. two as you move south the IJ have war canoes that can interdict ...I would say very likely ..

But .. it is very possible to get Ramree by ground build it up and project power into the battlespace ..

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7681
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 5:17:29 AM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
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So it's decided...or maybe not.

Honestly, it is a bit presumptuous to be planning the next op when this one has not really finished.

******Plan for Dec 29/30*******

The intel screen shows shocking numbers of LYB planes destroyed on the ground from the attacks at Mandaray and Darwin. No wonder the chatter has grown quiet. The one day hiatus from anti-shipping attacks has had quite a salubrious effect on the fighters aboard the carriers. A fresh F4F squadron joined Yorktown from Alice. Wasp and Irrustrious and the two Royal Navy battlewagons were refueled from the CVE's which really have massive fuel bunkers. Yorktown has no torpedoes but neither does she have TBF's. Therefore the carriers and RN BB/BC's will move back West to support more supplies and heavy equipment debarkation at Darwin and Bathurst. A cruiser force will cover the transports for Bathurst with LRCAP from Gove.

Maryland will detach from the amphbious group for more ammo and fuel. The fast BB's will try to draw ammo from the 5400 ton AE's at Gove.

No bombers are likely to be found at Darwin and few at Wyndham now. Both airfields will get attention form the heavies.

Dobo has a level one airfield now. The B-25's at Merauke will go after it.

(in reply to Crackaces)
Post #: 7682
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 5:30:10 AM   
Cap Mandrake


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Thanks to the Accountable Care Act (and other do-gooders) we now have an "electronic medical record". Sure it sounds cool but what it really does is take all the work that we used to give to staff and hand it back to the doctors. Even worse, you can't just throw **** away like a mail carrier. Everything gets documented and recorded.

A verbal order turns into something from the 8th level of Hell with 2**X emails (where X=the number of employees).

Today I get this "task" marked with an urgent button. It is the 6th message in a string of communication. It reads "Doctor Mandrake; Mrs. McGuillicuty wanted you to know that Lisbeth had a reall big bowel movement today"

What the Hell am I supposed to do with that? Send cigars? Throw a baby shower?

In the end I resisted entering a snarky comment and just typed "Noted". Then I hit the very satisfying "Done" button and sent the message string to the 9th level of Hell.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7683
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 5:44:55 AM   
Cap Mandrake


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So I am in Rite Aid (a pharmacy) to pick up Stalker Girl's medicine after her ankle surgery. It's going to take a few minutes to slaughter all those poppy plants so I head over to the booze section.
Stalker Girl has strict orders not to drink any alcohol so I decide to get some of that high end juniper berry nectar in that cool blue bottle (you know what I mean) all for myself. It's even on sale. Woohoo! It's my lucky day.

I go to pay for my single purchase and the clerk asks,

Do you have your Health and Wellness Card?

I'm sorry?

Your Health and Wellness Card?

For gin?

Yes, it's for everything.

What about cigarettes?

Yes, it works for that too.

Your kidding?

No sir? Do you want cigarettes too?

No, I think I have all the wellness I need right here. What happens if I have a card?

You get a discount sir.

How much?

36 cents.

So if I use my Health and Wellness card I get 36 cents off on something that may kill me?

Yes sir.

Doesn't that strike you as incongruous?

Sir, i just work here.

Well, just ring me up, I don't think I have a card.

Would you like to apply for one sir?


(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7684
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 8:01:13 AM   
sprior


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From: Portsmouth, UK
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quote:

So it's decided...or maybe not.


I think maybe not. But maybe. So, Timor - Sumatra - Java?

quote:

it is a bit presumptuous to be planning the next op


No, we need to start pre-positioning the forces/supplies/fuel that will be needed.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7685
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 2:42:04 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Well, do you need the Aus I Corps or can you do it with forces already in India?

If you don't need I Corps then 50 days is the earliest possible date for Sumatra. That would take us to sometime around Feb 18, 1943(c).

If you need I Corps then we have to wait for Darwin to crack. That would move us back to end of Feb (optimistically) to allow Darwin to crack and I Corps to prep. The USN fast carriers would have to leave Northern Oz about 2 weeks before the attack (the later the better). Formidable (or whatever adjective carrier it is) could not get from Panama to the Indian Ocean until early to mid March.

Repulse and PoW can also be released about the same time as the US carriers and the repairing fast USN BB's in California can take their place in Oz.

In the meantime we can make lots of noise in and around Oz, perhaps Lautem if the garrison is not too strong. I just reconned Lautem for the first time today.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/17/2012 2:43:14 PM >

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 7686
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 2:53:26 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
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*************Dec 30, 1942(c)****************


Darwin/Bathurst: It seems the Bathurst group got out a little too far ahead of the carriers and did not benefit from the carrier CAP. The LRCAP from Gove was not quite sufficient. A mild case of victory disease.

Afternoon Air attack on TF, near Bathurst Island at 76,123

Weather in hex: Heavy rain

Raid detected at 67 NM, estimated altitude 13,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 23 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 11
G4M1 Betty x 4



Allied aircraft
Beaufighter Ic x 1
F4F-4 Wildcat x 3


Japanese aircraft losses
A6M2 Zero: 1 destroyed
G4M1 Betty: 2 damaged
G4M1 Betty: 1 destroyed by flak

Allied aircraft losses
F4F-4 Wildcat: 1 destroyed

Allied Ships
AP U.S. Grant, Torpedo hits 1, and is sunk


Allied ground losses:
254 casualties reported
Squads: 7 destroyed, 1 disabled
Non Combat: 12 destroyed, 8 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled


I think these were SeaBees aboard USS Grant. Oops. Nice AP too. LYB air losses in Zeroes and Bettys were moderately heavy after several small raids were repulsed. A second day of ground bombardment at Darwin reveals the LYB's are not giving up yet.

Ground combat at Darwin (76,124)

Allied Bombardment attack

Attacking force 20590 troops, 465 guns, 314 vehicles, Assault Value = 1258

Defending force 16644 troops, 152 guns, 145 vehicles, Assault Value = 529

Japanese ground losses:
44 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 3 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled


Allied ground losses:
23 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 3 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled


Assaulting units:
22nd Marine Regiment
632nd TD Bn /1
2/2 AIF Pioneer Battalion
I Aus Corps Engineer Battalion
7th Australian Division
6th Marine Regiment
6th Australian Division
1st Marine Regiment
2/1 AIF Pioneer Battalion
2nd USMC Engineer Regiment
193rd Tank Bn /2
2nd USMC Field Artillery Battalion
South Pacific
2nd RAAF M/W Sqn /1
21/22 Field Regiment
134th Field Artillery Battalion
8th Marine Defense Battalion
225th Field Artillery Battalion
2/11th Field Regiment
16th USN SeaBees /1
2/9th Field Regiment
2nd Australian Hvy AA Rgt /1

Defending units:
18th Tank Regiment
38th/A Division
21st Ind.Mixed Brigade
4th Engineer Co
38th/B Division
107th JAAF AF Bn
22nd Ind.AA Gun Co
52nd JNAF AF Unit
53rd JNAF AF Unit
5th Div /2


Fairly good smackdown by the B-17's at Darwin. I had to convert one B-17 squadron to B-25's as all the squadrons are light on airframes. No CAP either at Darwin or Wyndham.

Afternoon Air attack on Darwin , at 76,124

Weather in hex: Clear sky

Raid detected at 36 NM, estimated altitude 13,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 11 minutes

Japanese aircraft
no flights


Allied aircraft
B-17E Fortress x 17
B-17F Fortress x 3


Japanese aircraft losses
Ki-43-Ic Oscar: 1 destroyed on ground
Ki-44-IIa Tojo: 1 destroyed on ground
Ki-30 Ann: 1 destroyed on ground

Allied aircraft losses
B-17E Fortress: 1 damaged
B-17F Fortress: 1 damaged



Airbase hits 1
Airbase supply hits 1
Runway hits 8



< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/17/2012 2:54:51 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7687
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 2:59:17 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
Dobo: The LYB grass strip (half built by us) at Dobo gets a few fairway bunkers. The second hole is now tough because you have to fly the bunker to reach the green in two. That should distract the Little Yellow Bastard officers for a bit.


Afternoon Air attack on Dobo , at 83,116

Weather in hex: Light cloud

Raid spotted at 19 NM, estimated altitude 10,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 5 minutes


Allied aircraft
B-25C Mitchell x 15


No Allied losses



Airbase hits 3
Airbase supply hits 3
Runway hits 22

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7688
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:01:49 PM   
Crackaces


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Thanks to the Accountable Care Act (and other do-gooders) we now have an "electronic medical record". Sure it sounds cool but what it really does is take all the work that we used to give to staff and hand it back to the doctors. Even worse, you can't just throw **** away like a mail carrier. Everything gets documented and recorded.

A verbal order turns into something from the 8th level of Hell with 2**X emails (where X=the number of employees).

Today I get this "task" marked with an urgent button. It is the 6th message in a string of communication. It reads "Doctor Mandrake; Mrs. McGuillicuty wanted you to know that Lisbeth had a reall big bowel movement today"

What the Hell am I supposed to do with that? Send cigars? Throw a baby shower?

In the end I resisted entering a snarky comment and just typed "Noted". Then I hit the very satisfying "Done" button and sent the message string to the 9th level of Hell.


The really bad part of this is that it feeds the beast ...Now this conversation is on record ..for some Litigation Trickster to manipulate facts .. "Dr Mandrake did you not know that large bowel movements are associated with Celiac disease and gluten intolerance symptoms and yet you ignored these important signs causing my clieint millions of dollars of stress and inconvenience ..." "I didn't ignore anything .. it was noted .. :) "

As you know Dr. Mandrake, a very serious side effect because the User Interfaces are horrible written by the same kinds of geeks that write code for wargames Providers spend a great deal of the time managing documentation rather than seeing patients. I am just starting out on my provider adventure and work 3 different EHR systems all with thier own very non-intutive UI ...

Ok back to the war!

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7689
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:07:31 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
Status: offline
Port Headrand: the long lost Bn. of Br. 2nd Div is reunited with the division. JJ is just getting plasterized by air. One air HQ for the Beauforts at Exmouth and one for the USAAF medium and heavy bombers at Meekathara. It's a milk run.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7690
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:16:56 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
Status: offline
Saumlaki (It's NE of bathurst and WSW of Dobo and it is so inconsequential I don't think it even has a Catholic mission): The long suffering 503rd PIR takes a beating. I think I jumped the gun on the attack at Saumluki as the carriers are too busy to cover a landing of engineers there.

Morning Air attack on 503rd Parachute Regiment, at 78,117 (Saumlaki)

Weather in hex: Clear sky

Raid spotted at 20 NM, estimated altitude 8,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 5 minutes

Japanese aircraft
Ki-21-IIa Sally x 21
Ki-45 KAIa Nick x 1



Japanese aircraft losses
Ki-21-IIa Sally: 1 damaged


Allied ground losses:
48 casualties reported
Squads: 2 destroyed, 6 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 2 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled


< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/17/2012 3:36:20 PM >

(in reply to Crackaces)
Post #: 7691
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:23:06 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
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Hey look! One of the subs on patrol near the Home Islands hit something.

We are officially renaming the island "**** You Jima"

Sub attack near Fukue-jima at 100,59

Japanese Ships
xAKL Batavia Maru, Torpedo hits 1, heavy damage
xAK Unkai Maru #6
xAK Kirisima Maru
xAKL Toshin Maru
xAKL Shinsoku Maru
xAKL Tohuku Maru
xAKL Nitiyu Maru
PB Taiko Maru

Allied Ships
SS Guardfish

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7692
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:33:03 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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Adak: Pvt. Lefkowitz suffered mild frostbite to his male member while trying to take a leak outdoors at night. This prompted a warning lecture from the Chief Medical Officer with graphic pictures.
There were a few wisecracks but there was also quite a bit of squirming in seats. The slides were actually from a VD lecture but pretty much everyone fell for it.

(in reply to Crackaces)
Post #: 7693
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:42:14 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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**********HQ Tawi Tawi Enterprises, LLC, Bathurst Is., Dec. 30, 1942(c)*******


Fr. O'Brien, CEO: <on the radio with Anglican mission Saumlaki> Hallo Roger. Good to hear you.

.....

Oh, and you too. Say listen, I understand you have American paratroopers on Saumlaki?

.....

Yes I know, but if you play it right, it is really a gift from God. Let me hook you up with a good law firm.

....

No problem. They will take a future interest in lieu of current payment....

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7694
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:44:48 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Adak: Pvt. Lefkowitz suffered mild frostbite to his male member while trying to take a leak outdoors at night. This prompted a warning lecture from the Chief Medical Officer with graphic pictures.
There were a few wisecracks but there was also quite a bit of squirming in seats. The slides were actually from a VD lecture but pretty much everyone fell for it.


Did something like this happen already? I'm serious. I can't be sure if I am stealing material from previous WWII's at this point.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7695
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:48:45 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
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Burma: More fighter sweeps near Mandaray. This has to be getting pretty bloody annoying for the LYB commanders. Payback is a bitch. they did the same thing over Ledo for a month.

Morning Air attack on Shwebo , at 59,45

Weather in hex: Light cloud

Raid spotted at 23 NM, estimated altitude 31,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 5 minutes

Japanese aircraft
A6M2 Zero x 4
A6M3 Zero x 7
Ki-43-IIa Oscar x 4
Ki-44-IIa Tojo x 2



Allied aircraft
Hurricane IIc Trop x 9


Japanese aircraft losses
Ki-43-IIa Oscar: 1 destroyed

No Allied losses

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7696
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:49:35 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
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From: San Antonio, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Adak: Pvt. Lefkowitz suffered mild frostbite to his male member while trying to take a leak outdoors at night. This prompted a warning lecture from the Chief Medical Officer with graphic pictures.
There were a few wisecracks but there was also quite a bit of squirming in seats. The slides were actually from a VD lecture but pretty much everyone fell for it.


Did something like this happen already? I'm serious. I can't be sure if I am stealing material from previous WWII's at this point.

What? Wisecracks? Jokes about VD? Yes.

Please consider diversifying your banality portfolio to include more of the underrepresented fart jokes subset, Cap'n. As equity investors in your enterprise (I own 2 shares for 25% apiece as well as a controlling position in coral bomb manufacturing subsystems), we are anxious to see you keeping pace with WWII(c) AAR market conditions.

_____________________________


(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7697
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:50:58 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
China: <makes raspberry sound>

Morning Air attack on 33rd Division, at 68,46 (Tsuyung)

Weather in hex: Severe storms

Raid spotted at 20 NM, estimated altitude 10,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 6 minutes


Allied aircraft
B-24D Liberator x 5
B-25C Mitchell x 19


No Allied losses

Japanese ground losses:
11 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7698
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:53:53 PM   
Cap Mandrake


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From: Southern California
Status: offline
Fart jokes? Hey, that's a great idea. I wonder if Admiral Lord SPrior has some Royal Navy fart jokes? They must be a central concern on submarines.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 5/17/2012 3:55:03 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7699
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:54:48 PM   
witpqs


Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Adak: Pvt. Lefkowitz suffered mild frostbite to his male member while trying to take a leak outdoors at night. This prompted a warning lecture from the Chief Medical Officer with graphic pictures.
There were a few wisecracks but there was also quite a bit of squirming in seats. The slides were actually from a VD lecture but pretty much everyone fell for it.


Did something like this happen already? I'm serious. I can't be sure if I am stealing material from previous WWII's at this point.

What? Wisecracks? Jokes about VD? Yes.

Please consider diversifying your banality portfolio to include more of the underrepresented fart jokes subset, Cap'n. As equity investors in your enterprise (I own 2 shares for 25% apiece as well as a controlling position in coral bomb manufacturing subsystems), we are anxious to see you keeping pace with WWII(c) AAR market conditions.

+1 on the fart jokes. They're always a hit.

(in reply to Chickenboy)
Post #: 7700
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 3:56:47 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
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From: San Antonio, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Adak: Pvt. Lefkowitz suffered mild frostbite to his male member while trying to take a leak outdoors at night. This prompted a warning lecture from the Chief Medical Officer with graphic pictures.
There were a few wisecracks but there was also quite a bit of squirming in seats. The slides were actually from a VD lecture but pretty much everyone fell for it.


Did something like this happen already? I'm serious. I can't be sure if I am stealing material from previous WWII's at this point.

What? Wisecracks? Jokes about VD? Yes.

Please consider diversifying your banality portfolio to include more of the underrepresented fart jokes subset, Cap'n. As equity investors in your enterprise (I own 2 shares for 25% apiece as well as a controlling position in coral bomb manufacturing subsystems), we are anxious to see you keeping pace with WWII(c) AAR market conditions.

+1 on the fart jokes. They're always a hit.


Yes. And if you can work them into the context of a head and shoulders technical pattern for the SPY, whilest simultaneously advising us about the Tojo IIa aircover over Mandalay, that would be most helpful and contemporary.

_____________________________


(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 7701
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 4:08:18 PM   
witpqs


Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs

quote:

ORIGINAL: Chickenboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Adak: Pvt. Lefkowitz suffered mild frostbite to his male member while trying to take a leak outdoors at night. This prompted a warning lecture from the Chief Medical Officer with graphic pictures.
There were a few wisecracks but there was also quite a bit of squirming in seats. The slides were actually from a VD lecture but pretty much everyone fell for it.


Did something like this happen already? I'm serious. I can't be sure if I am stealing material from previous WWII's at this point.

What? Wisecracks? Jokes about VD? Yes.

Please consider diversifying your banality portfolio to include more of the underrepresented fart jokes subset, Cap'n. As equity investors in your enterprise (I own 2 shares for 25% apiece as well as a controlling position in coral bomb manufacturing subsystems), we are anxious to see you keeping pace with WWII(c) AAR market conditions.

+1 on the fart jokes. They're always a hit.


Yes. And if you can work them into the context of a head and shoulders technical pattern for the SPY, whilest simultaneously advising us about the Tojo IIa aircover over Mandalay, that would be most helpful and contemporary.

Maybe one astute flight leader over Mandalay has figured out that if he orders his flight to roll first and then break big wind as they pull back on the stick they will increase the Tojo's dive speed by 10kph... a significant tactical improvement.

(in reply to Chickenboy)
Post #: 7702
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 5:41:20 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs
Maybe one astute flight leader over Mandalay has figured out that if he orders his flight to roll first and then break big wind as they pull back on the stick they will increase the Tojo's dive speed by 10kph... a significant tactical improvement.



*********************Heaven, May 17, 2012, AD********************

Sir Isaac Newton: <throws down ethereal mouse...but it goes right through cloud..later striking a believer in Islam some 25 Earth minutes later in Bangladesh...who, of course, ascribes it to "God's will"> No, no, no, NO, NO!!!!

It is just going to bounce off the pilot's seat and cancel out!

(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 7703
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 7:11:42 PM   
witpqs


Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs
Maybe one astute flight leader over Mandalay has figured out that if he orders his flight to roll first and then break big wind as they pull back on the stick they will increase the Tojo's dive speed by 10kph... a significant tactical improvement.



*********************Heaven, May 17, 2012, AD********************

Sir Isaac Newton: <throws down ethereal mouse...but it goes right through cloud..later striking a believer in Islam some 25 Earth minutes later in Bangladesh...who, of course, ascribes it to "God's will"> No, no, no, NO, NO!!!!

It is just going to bounce off the pilot's seat and cancel out!

Not after the field mod!

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7704
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 8:17:12 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Adak: Pvt. Lefkowitz suffered mild frostbite to his male member while trying to take a leak outdoors at night. This prompted a warning lecture from the Chief Medical Officer with graphic pictures.
There were a few wisecracks but there was also quite a bit of squirming in seats. The slides were actually from a VD lecture but pretty much everyone fell for it.


Did something like this happen already? I'm serious. I can't be sure if I am stealing material from previous WWII's at this point.


I remember being warned about the dangers of "urinating in an improper place" which included an impressive picture of Jolly Jack's wedding tackle after he'd syphoned the python onto an open 440v connector.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7705
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 8:25:24 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Fart jokes? Hey, that's a great idea. I wonder if Admiral Lord SPrior has some Royal Navy fart jokes? They must be a central concern on submarines.


Three eskimoes in an igloo:

Eskimo 1: It's so cold in my ilgoo that my pee freezes nebore it hits the ice
Eskimo 2: Mine is so cold that when I take a dump the turds shatter when they hit the ice
Eskino 3: Look! (pulls back seal skins to reveal 4 brown rings)
Eskimo 1: So?
Eskimo 3 peels off a ring and throws it into the fire and it goes "thhhhppphhhhhhht"

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7706
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 8:36:59 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs
Maybe one astute flight leader over Mandalay has figured out that if he orders his flight to roll first and then break big wind as they pull back on the stick they will increase the Tojo's dive speed by 10kph... a significant tactical improvement.



*********************Heaven, May 17, 2012, AD********************

Sir Isaac Newton: <throws down ethereal mouse...but it goes right through cloud..later striking a believer in Islam some 25 Earth minutes later in Bangladesh...who, of course, ascribes it to "God's will"> No, no, no, NO, NO!!!!

It is just going to bounce off the pilot's seat and cancel out!

Not after the field mod!








Attachment (1)

(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 7707
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 8:37:46 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Fart jokes? Hey, that's a great idea. I wonder if Admiral Lord SPrior has some Royal Navy fart jokes? They must be a central concern on submarines.


Three eskimoes in an igloo:

Eskimo 1: It's so cold in my ilgoo that my pee freezes nebore it hits the ice
Eskimo 2: Mine is so cold that when I take a dump the turds shatter when they hit the ice
Eskino 3: Look! (pulls back seal skins to reveal 4 brown rings)
Eskimo 1: So?
Eskimo 3 peels off a ring and throws it into the fire and it goes "thhhhppphhhhhhht"




(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 7708
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 8:52:30 PM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline
A midwife is walking past the hospital staffroom, when she hears two African doctors talking, "I'm telling you it's wumba: W-U-M-B-A," says the first.

"No. It's woombaa: W-O-O-M-B-A-A," says the second.

"No, no, no. Wumba: W-U-M-B-A," says the first again.

At this the nurse pops her head through the door, "I think you'll find, gentlemen, it's WOMB: W-O-M-B,"

The two doctors look blankly at her, until one of them says, "Madam. I doubt if you've ever even SEEN a water buffalo, let alone heard one fart in a mudpool,".


_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7709
RE: Hearts and Minds - 5/17/2012 9:18:51 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake







Cap'n Mandrake,

You have the wrong caption for the pilot's seat shown. This is clearly the "Dangling Goose" model variant, not the "Diving Kormorant" model.

_____________________________


(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 7710
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