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RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/24/2013 2:21:49 PM   
catwhoorg


Posts: 686
Joined: 9/27/2012
From: Uk expat lving near Atlanta
Status: offline 		The standard in the UK is in case of simultaneous death, the older person died first unless there is conclusive evidence to the contrary.

30 day survivor clauses are commonly added to wills.

(in reply to Bullwinkle58)
Post #: 31
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/25/2013 1:51:00 AM   
denisonh


Posts: 2194
Joined: 12/21/2001
From: Upstate SC
Status: offline 		Mammon is a cruel master

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Post #: 32
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/25/2013 3:36:31 AM   
Bullwinkle58


Posts: 11302
Joined: 2/24/2009
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: catwhoorg

The standard in the UK is in case of simultaneous death, the older person died first unless there is conclusive evidence to the contrary.

30 day survivor clauses are commonly added to wills.


Huh. I think I like ours better.

The common law was very different than modern simultaneous statutes. Maybe the UK is still more on the common law line of thinking.

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Post #: 33
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/25/2013 4:43:18 AM   
PaxMondo


Posts: 9750
Joined: 6/6/2008
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: wdolson
I probably would have done similar.

Bill

Thanks Bill. Appreciate this.


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Post #: 34
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/25/2013 1:07:06 PM   
catwhoorg


Posts: 686
Joined: 9/27/2012
From: Uk expat lving near Atlanta
Status: offline 		Moose,

I don't think there is any way that is better. Consistency is the key in such circumstances.

(in reply to PaxMondo)
Post #: 35
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/25/2013 4:37:34 PM   
oldman45


Posts: 2320
Joined: 5/1/2005
From: Jacksonville Fl
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Fallschirmjager

I have a law degree as well. I don't have a practice, but if people ask me for legal advice in terms of estate planning, then I do advise them. The quickest way to destroy a family is to die and not leave a will in place. My recommendation would be to leave a will to your estate in the hands of a third party, like an attorney, financial planner or mediator. Don't leave it in the hands of a blood relative.


That is good advice. My parents did that and I thought it was kind crazy, since I was the first male born and all. ;) Then came the inevitable and thank goodness there was a third party dealing with the siblings. Estates do bring the worst out in people.

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Post #: 36
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/25/2013 11:49:48 PM   
Kull


Posts: 2625
Joined: 7/3/2007
From: El Paso, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: wdolson

A few years ago I read a book about borderline personality disorders (BPD) and how they affect people. The author was an engineering professor but was inspired to write the book from her experiences with her own sister who had BPD. She said at the end of the book when she tells people about BPD, she gets one of two reactions. Either, "that can't be, nobody is like that!" or "let me tell you my story..."


"Let me tell you my story". She is so right about that. My ex-MIL sued her own daughter - twice. The second time it was in order to steal her daughter's house away from her. I'll spare you the details, but anyone who's dealt with BPD's knows just how nasty and deceitful they can be. The average person isn't prepared for that level of evil, especially coming from your own mother.

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Post #: 37
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/27/2013 9:52:53 PM   
moore4807


Posts: 1089
Joined: 6/2/2000
From: Punta Gorda FL
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: oldman45


quote:

ORIGINAL: Fallschirmjager

I have a law degree as well. I don't have a practice, but if people ask me for legal advice in terms of estate planning, then I do advise them. The quickest way to destroy a family is to die and not leave a will in place. My recommendation would be to leave a will to your estate in the hands of a third party, like an attorney, financial planner or mediator. Don't leave it in the hands of a blood relative.


That is good advice. My parents did that and I thought it was kind crazy, since I was the first male born and all. ;) Then came the inevitable and thank goodness there was a third party dealing with the siblings. Estates do bring the worst out in people.



Our family is going through that now - There is so far three attorneys involved with parts of the will and how the executor handled the disbursements. Nobody is talking to each other and the lawyers are going to be the only ones walking away with the money. I tried telling my stepson that but he replied that the lawsuits were "only taking food out his kids mouths" Yet driving by his house there is a brand new Super Duty Pickup and a full size Camper trailer parked in his driveway... its not going to end well...
I think I can name my D-I-L as good competition for the original poster, and told my wife its better to find this out now than before we named anybody to take care of us in our later years!!!

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Post #: 38
RE: OT - What a horrible daughter - 9/29/2013 5:58:59 PM   
TSCofield

 

Posts: 223
Joined: 5/12/2001
From: Ft. Lewis Washington
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs


quote:

ORIGINAL: PaxMondo

Sometimes people mistake me for a nice guy. I'm not.

I was executor of Dad's estate, and he wanted each of us siblings and his current wife to share equally. His wife was not a US citizen at the time and they were not living in the US at the time.

Nice guy I am not; ethical and loyal I am. My Dad wanted it, and that is what he got. To the point that even though she was not in his will (intentionally), I had each sibling write a check after probate to the widow so that in the end everyone got exactly an even share. Fair.

The not nice guy part comes in with a couple of recalcitrant siblings. They did pay. Grudgingly, but they did pay. The good thing is that my siblings really do know I am not a nice guy and even they don't want to be on my bad side.

I would also add that my Dad named me executor because he knew all this beforehand.

My point being that people don't always choose executors for the right reason. You don't want a Labrador for your executor, you want the Doberman. Simple. Direct. Loyal. Follows commands.

You might be using a definition of 'nice guy' that I disagree with. Being a nice person does not (in my lingo) mean unable to be as hard as you judge needed or appropriate, or letting people take advantage of you. That might be called a pushover.

You seem like a nice guy around these parts.

BTW, can I borrow $5? What's the vig?


I agree. PaxMondo, you are a nice guy. You just aren't a patsy or a pansy. You listened to your father, followed his wishes and did what was right no matter what others said.

You are a good son.

_____________________________

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(in reply to witpqs)
Post #: 39
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