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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere

 
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RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/21/2014 8:00:44 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		***********December 27, 1941(d)************


Fiji: The inbound TF's near Suva proved to be AK's. We sink three but they use up our ammo. Here is what we face at Suva. About what you would expect
We attack tomorrow after a night bombardment by the CA and CL groups near Fiji.

Ground combat at Suva (132,160)

Allied Bombardment attack

Attacking force 672 troops, 68 guns, 56 vehicles, Assault Value = 151

Defending force 7774 troops, 66 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 293

Assaulting units:
8th NZ Brigade
1st RNZAF Base Force
260th Field Artillery Battalion
148th Field Artillery Battalion
45th Base Group
147th Field Artillery Battalion
131st Field Artillery Battalion
Nandi Base Force

Defending units:
144th Infantry Regiment
52nd Naval Guard Unit
51st Naval Guard Unit
53rd Naval Guard Unit

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/21/2014 9:03:01 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 721
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/21/2014 8:13:09 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Maraysia: Arried mens stir trying to get Arried army mens out of Georgetown and stir bombarding Japan-mens on West coast Maraysia at night.
Admirarh SPrior-san figure out Arried pran and send Nerrs in at night. It armost work. Japan pirot-mens make big sprashes near Arried ships
Not-ah sure why torpedoes not-ah work in dark?

Night Air attack on TF, near Alor Star at 49,73

Weather in hex: Heavy cloud

Raid spotted at 42 NM, estimated altitude 14,000 feet.
Estimated time to target is 16 minutes

Japanese aircraft
G3M2 Nell x 8

No Japanese losses

Allied Ships
CL Hobart

Aircraft Attacking:
8 x G3M2 Nell bombing from 13000 feet
Naval Attack: 2 x 250 kg SAP Bomb, 4 x 60 kg GP Bomb


Arried Cl's arr ovah prace but not-ah sure bases important to Japan-mens

Night Naval bombardment of Taiping at 49,75

Allied Ships
CL Caledon
CL Capetown
CL Enterprise
DD Isis

Airbase hits 7
Runway hits 6
Port hits 5

And

Night Naval bombardment of Alor Star at 49,73

Allied Ships
CL Colombo
CL Mauritius
DD Piet Hein

Airbase hits 1
Airbase supply hits 2
Runway hits 3
Port supply hits 2

And

Night Naval bombardment of Alor Star at 49,73

Allied Ships
CL Glasgow
CL Hobart
DD Banckert

Port hits 1
Port supply hits 1

Chief steward to the view deck! Too bad she didn't sink. That is a big prize.

Submarine attack near Georgetown at 48,74

Japanese Ships
SS I-122

Allied Ships
xAP Zealandia, Torpedo hits 2, on fire, heavy damage

Allied ground losses:
19 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 1 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled


< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/21/2014 9:42:02 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 722
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/21/2014 8:25:56 PM   
witpqs


Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline
quote:

Not-ah sure why torpedoes not-ah work in dark?

Grobar Cooring mitigation - experimental torpedoes sorar powered!

_____________________________

Intel Monkey: https://sites.google.com/view/staffmonkeys/home

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 723
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/21/2014 8:47:55 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Burma: Nerr pirots in Indochina eat too much Wheaties, ignore big fat troopships and cruisers off Maraysia...then fry arr the way to Rangoon and run into freaking Frying Tigers.






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Post #: 724
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/21/2014 9:01:42 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		New and Improved Guinea: Nerrs from Rabaurh sink a coupurh of fungiburh AKL's.

Port Moresby invasion force reaves Rabaurh today.

--Invasion group...Capt. Oda, fragship Yura, 33 ships, 22K troops, 4th Infantry Div, 2nd Tank Regt, 1st Engr. Regt, 16th Army HQ, 32nd Special Base Force

--Heavy Surface Group...VAdm Moizumi..Nagato, Hyuga, 7 DD

--Medium Surface Group...Capt Shibuya...Ashigara, 4 DD

--Bombardment Group...Capt Nagai...Ise, 4 DD

--Carrier Strike Force...Nagumo...5 CV, crossing from Soromans.

--Reprenishment Group....Ensign Pulver, 5 AO, forrowing carries.




< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/21/2014 10:04:50 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 725
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/21/2014 9:07:03 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Miura Detachment with a CL and DD as escort is headed down the NE side of the Soromons for New and Improved Caredonia

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 726
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/21/2014 9:23:05 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Ambon: We send in two Bn of 124th Infantry and 16th Navarh Guard. It go werr but Arried-mens shore guns brow up 7 pt AK pretty badry.

Dutch-mens at Ambon not-ah get memo about war ovah.


< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/21/2014 10:24:46 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 727
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/22/2014 1:45:04 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Changsa to Ichang Front




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(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 728
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/22/2014 3:39:20 AM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Mandrake-san have very eraborate dream.

Mandrake-san dream Mandrake-san in jazz improvisation contest. This-ah rearry amazing because Mandrake-san not pray instrument, not-ah sing very werr and not-ah rearry speak Engrish arr that great.

Song assigned to Mandrake-san was-ah West Texas Town of Er Paso by Mistah Marty Robbins.

Mandrake-san take guitar merody and turn it into rike Gypsey Dance Kings. It-ah sound rearry good!

Then-ah, Mandrake-san change story so that Ferina get shot instead of Mandrake-san. Then-ah whirhe Ferina dying, Ferina ask for arr of reratives to get green cards.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 729
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 5:22:35 AM   
sprior


Posts: 8596
Joined: 6/18/2002
From: Portsmouth, UK
Status: offline 		Hai! Prior-san rearn new verses to Barnacre Birr the Sairor. It very difficurt to sing, even when sober.

_____________________________

"Grown ups are what's left when skool is finished."
"History started badly and hav been geting steadily worse."
- Nigel Molesworth.



(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 730
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 2:26:51 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		HAI! SPrior-sans use of pronouns and adverbs very impressive. SPrior-san taking Engrish ressons from memsahib?

(in reply to sprior)
Post #: 731
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 2:30:40 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		*********December 28, 1941(d)**********

Ambon: Takao not-ah understand instructions. Just supposed to scare Morruccan-mens, not-ah brow everything up.

Night Naval bombardment of Ambon at 76,109 - Coastal Guns Fire Back!

2 Coastal gun shots fired in defense.

Japanese Ships
CA Takao
DD Oshio
DD Asashio
DD Maikaze

Allied ground losses:
535 casualties reported
Squads: 12 destroyed, 5 disabled
Non Combat: 15 destroyed, 20 disabled
Engineers: 2 destroyed, 1 disabled
Guns lost 13 (8 destroyed, 5 disabled)

Airbase hits 14
Airbase supply hits 8
Runway hits 30
Port hits 11

Finarry, Japan-mens capture prace. Cost Japan-mens one APD wrecked, one 8 pt AK sunk,
possibry one 18 pt AP sink. Honestry, Mandrake-san underestimate rittah brown mens and crappy rittah smoothbore Naporeans.

Ground combat at Ambon (76,109)

Japanese Deliberate attack

Attacking force 4450 troops, 25 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 177

Defending force 1502 troops, 21 guns, 4 vehicles, Assault Value = 31

Japanese adjusted assault: 70

Allied adjusted defense: 10

Japanese assault odds: 7 to 1 (fort level 0)

Japanese forces CAPTURE Ambon !!!

Combat modifiers
Defender: terrain(+), disruption(-), preparation(-), morale(-)
experience(-)
Attacker:

Japanese ground losses:
86 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 7 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled

Allied ground losses:
1307 casualties reported
Squads: 63 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 110 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 29 (29 destroyed, 0 disabled)
Vehicles lost 4 (4 destroyed, 0 disabled)
Units destroyed 3

Assaulting units:
II/124th Infantry Battalion
16th Naval Guard Unit
III/124th Infantry Battalion
III/81st Naval Guard Unit
6th JNAF Coy

Defending units:
Molukken Garrison Battalion
Ambon Base Force
Ambon Defenses

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/23/2014 3:39:48 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 732
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 2:51:53 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Suva: We bombard Suva at night with two CL's, Aoba and their escorts and then Japan-mens deriberate attack but just miss 1:1.
We sink one AK trying to do something nefarious but fail in the attack.

Mandrake-san should-ah wait a day or use shock attack. I brame staff-mens. Damn it. Arried-mens at Suva not get memo about war being ovah. Rot of that going around. Japan-mens sending 146th Regiment from Rabaurh. 146th Regiment was reserve unit for Port Moresby but Heck, war is Heck.


Ground combat at Suva (132,160)

Japanese Deliberate attack

Attacking force 7782 troops, 66 guns, 0 vehicles, Assault Value = 293

Defending force 8273 troops, 127 guns, 87 vehicles, Assault Value = 149

Japanese adjusted assault: 62

Allied adjusted defense: 69

Japanese assault odds: 1 to 2 (fort level 2)

Combat modifiers
Defender: terrain(+), disruption(-), preparation(-), experience(-)
Attacker: fatigue(-)

Japanese ground losses:
776 casualties reported
Squads: 6 destroyed, 92 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 1 disabled

Allied ground losses:
159 casualties reported
Squads: 1 destroyed, 25 disabled
Non Combat: 1 destroyed, 3 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 2 disabled

Assaulting units:
144th Infantry Regiment
51st Naval Guard Unit
52nd Naval Guard Unit
53rd Naval Guard Unit

Defending units:
8th NZ Brigade
147th Field Artillery Battalion
260th Field Artillery Battalion
148th Field Artillery Battalion
45th Base Group
131st Field Artillery Battalion
1st RNZAF Base Force
Nandi Base Force

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/23/2014 3:58:58 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 733
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 2:56:20 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Honky Fidd: Canadian-mens not-ah ready to give up. Japan-mens arready drop enough bombs to kirr Gojira. Maybe use Bettys from Formosa?
Maybe see if Raymond Burr around?


Ground combat at Hong Kong (77,61)

Japanese Bombardment attack

Attacking force 18932 troops, 289 guns, 167 vehicles, Assault Value = 560

Defending force 7934 troops, 122 guns, 72 vehicles, Assault Value = 219

Allied ground losses:
15 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 2 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 2 (1 destroyed, 1 disabled)

Assaulting units:
38th Division
66th Infantry Regiment
19th Ind Engineer Regiment
20th Ind Engineer Regiment
1st Hvy.Artillery Regiment
10th Ind. Mountain Gun Regiment
2nd Mortar Battalion
3rd Ind.Hvy.Art. Battalion
2nd Ind.Hvy.Art. Battalion
5th RF Gun Battalion
2nd RF Gun Battalion
20th Ind. Mtn Gun Battalion

Defending units:
1st Middlesex Battalion
Rifles of Canada Battalion
Winnipeg Grenadiers Battalion
Kowloon Brigade
102nd RN Base Force
Hong Kong Fortress

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/23/2014 4:02:11 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 734
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 3:09:59 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Harro, Mistah Burr, come in Mistah Burr.




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(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 735
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 3:31:31 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Port Moresby: Quiet, arhmost too quiet. Haha, sorry. I rearn that at Haha-jima schoorh of Yiddish comedy.

Actuarry, approach to Port Moresby amazingry competent. Nobody stop to rook at frying fish. No corrisions. No enemy air attacks. Arried-mens spot at reast main body so probabry figure out what-ah happening. Obvious route is through Jomard Passage so Japan-mens go crose to New Guinean and perhaps scrape up expensive properrers.
Ise bombard Port Moresby tonight. Crosest spotted Arried ships near Sydney but-ah recon spotty at rong range.





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(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 736
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 3:35:51 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		I-122 returning from 1st combat patrol off Georgetown. Japan-navy-mens do arr they can.
Captain have to submit urine sampurh for steroids when get back.





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< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/23/2014 4:37:34 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 737
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 3:47:05 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Evacuation from Georgetown. Arried-mens pran working very werr. Netties from Indochina grounded by weather one day and next day attack Rangoon instead. Today they take day off compretery. Some Sarrys from Patani attack but Arreid-ships not-ah hord stirh




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(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 738
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 3:57:06 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		This-ah why it-ah more fun to have-ah war against rear Arried-mens instead of computer.

Mandrake-san send Kaga air group to Formosa. In two days maybe arrive in Maraysia....then Arried-ships not raugh so much.

Maybe SPrior-san can put some Nerrs at Patani too. That-ah wipe smire off faces.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/23/2014 4:57:39 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 739
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/23/2014 4:07:44 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Ruzon. Rooks rike Arried-mens make stand at Crark Fierd.




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(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 740
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/24/2014 4:30:09 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		***********December 29, 1941(d)***********


Ruzon: Sneaky Arried-dogs sneak in some P-40's to Bataan? and shoot down 4 Bettys. Zero escorts in Takao fly over Hong Kong instead of with Bettys. Arried mens are trying to run in suppry AK's and AKL's to Ruzon. Japan-mens orders CVL's to Suru Sea and some PB's to guard Manira Bay and Bataan. Japan-mens wise to this trick because we use in former rife.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/24/2014 5:31:14 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 741
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/24/2014 4:33:00 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Port Moresby: The landing group makes excerrent progress and will begin landing tonight but Ise stopped to rook at frying fish. Mandrake-san remind captain of Ise of mission so get ass to Port Moresby tonight. No sign of Arried-mens ships.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/24/2014 5:42:12 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 742
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/24/2014 4:34:19 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Maraysia: Rook rike Dunkirk II ovah. Bah.

SPrior-san moving on Singapores. Seems to me Japan-mens need to bomb prace a bit.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/24/2014 5:35:02 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 743
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/24/2014 4:41:26 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Mandrake-san HQ farring apart. Water coming out of wall.

Mandrake-san turn on water again for 20 minutes so everyone run around and frush toirets and brush teeth and take showers. Mandrake-san nevah see so much efficiency and energy from normarry deadbeat 13 year old. Mandrake-san hatch idea to pretend watah broken forever.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/26/2014 2:35:24 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 744
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/24/2014 5:13:30 PM   
BBfanboy


Posts: 18046
Joined: 8/4/2010
From: Winnipeg, MB
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san HQ farring apart. Water coming out of wall. Mandrake-san make sure carpet get ruined downstairs so get new carpet from baaaahstards at State Farm.

Mandrake-san turn on water again for 20 minutes so everyone run around and frush toirets and brush teeth and take showers. Mandrake-san nevah see so much efficiency and energy from normarry deadbeat 13 year old. Mandrake-san hatch idea to pretend watah broken forever.

Perhaps you are Moses reincarnated! Did you strike the wall with your staff before the water came gushing out?

Does the HOA know you will be putting half a ton of wet carpet out at the curb for the trash pickup? Will they allow it if the carpet pattern is to their taste?

_____________________________

No matter how bad a situation is, you can always make it worse. - Chris Hadfield : An Astronaut's Guide To Life On Earth

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 745
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/24/2014 10:10:10 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BBfanboy


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san HQ farring apart. Water coming out of wall. Mandrake-san make sure carpet get ruined downstairs so get new carpet from baaaahstards at State Farm.

Mandrake-san turn on water again for 20 minutes so everyone run around and frush toirets and brush teeth and take showers. Mandrake-san nevah see so much efficiency and energy from normarry deadbeat 13 year old. Mandrake-san hatch idea to pretend watah broken forever.

Perhaps you are Moses reincarnated! Did you strike the wall with your staff before the water came gushing out?

Does the HOA know you will be putting half a ton of wet carpet out at the curb for the trash pickup? Will they allow it if the carpet pattern is to their taste?


One time Mandrake-san throw away some carpet in recycle bin and the f****** trash-mans write Mandrake-san a nasty message.


Mandrake-san just get off brower with HOA HQ. Damndest thing happen. Nice HOA-womans aporogize for nasty retters and rook back at arr of messages about f****** pine tree and say "poor homeowner-mans! HOA-woman need to aprorogize."

HOA-womans say neighbor comprain about f***** radder.

Mandrake-san say painters not 35 feet tarr.

HOA-womans raugh. Mandrake-san wonder if want to have date. Hory crap! Mandrake-san forget memsahib.


Mandrake-san not-ah get any respect.

(in reply to BBfanboy)
Post #: 746
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/25/2014 3:28:32 PM   
Chickenboy


Posts: 24520
Joined: 6/29/2002
From: San Antonio, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
Mandrake-san not-ah get any respect.


Hai!

_____________________________


(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 747
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/25/2014 5:21:27 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Mandrake-san find out Hiei not-ah aburh to rearm main guns even at Truk with rever 6 port and 260 navarh support.

Seem rike Japan-mens need cranes or not-ah buird guns so big.

Japan-mens sending new AE to Truk. Broody annoying. Fortunatery, Mandrake-san pran ahead and send two more BB's to Rabaurh to wait around.

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 748
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/25/2014 5:29:09 PM   
Cap Mandrake


Posts: 23184
Joined: 11/15/2002
From: Southern California
Status: offline 		Will a Kashino class AKE (5700 tons) be able to do the job at Truk given the port size and naval support.


I realize someone explained this before but pretend it didn't take.

< Message edited by Cap Mandrake -- 9/25/2014 6:30:09 PM >

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 749
RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-pr... - 9/25/2014 5:56:32 PM   
witpqs


Posts: 26087
Joined: 10/4/2004
From: Argleton
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

quote:

ORIGINAL: BBfanboy

quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san HQ farring apart. Water coming out of wall. Mandrake-san make sure carpet get ruined downstairs so get new carpet from baaaahstards at State Farm.

Mandrake-san turn on water again for 20 minutes so everyone run around and frush toirets and brush teeth and take showers. Mandrake-san nevah see so much efficiency and energy from normarry deadbeat 13 year old. Mandrake-san hatch idea to pretend watah broken forever.

Perhaps you are Moses reincarnated! Did you strike the wall with your staff before the water came gushing out?

Does the HOA know you will be putting half a ton of wet carpet out at the curb for the trash pickup? Will they allow it if the carpet pattern is to their taste?


One time Mandrake-san throw away some carpet in recycle bin and the f****** trash-mans write Mandrake-san a nasty message.


Mandrake-san just get off brower with HOA HQ. Damndest thing happen. Nice HOA-womans aporogize for nasty retters and rook back at arr of messages about f****** pine tree and say "poor homeowner-mans! HOA-woman need to aprorogize."

HOA-womans say neighbor comprain about f***** radder.

Mandrake-san say painters not 35 feet tarr.

HOA-womans raugh. Mandrake-san wonder if want to have date. Hory crap! Mandrake-san forget memsahib.


Mandrake-san not-ah get any respect.


Mandrake-san get more respect from now on. Last night noticed real reason for HOA backpedal on SyFy channel listings.




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_____________________________

Intel Monkey: https://sites.google.com/view/staffmonkeys/home

(in reply to Cap Mandrake)
Post #: 750
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