RE: Is This A Joke? (Full Version)

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Mr.Frag -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 3:18:59 AM)

quote:

IF you
go on with this thread
AND the patch is delayed because of this
THEN I will come after you.


ELSE I will laugh at you [:D]



Rainer -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 3:53:16 AM)

I give up. You win [:)]


FOR linecounter EQUAL 1 TO 1000
PRINT "Mr. Frag, back to the working bench! Now! /CR"
linecounter = linecounter - 1
CONTINUE

Oh, golly, anybody FORTRAN IV ?.[:'(]



Tankerace -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 3:53:23 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rainer

Sh..! I've forgotten the lady's name.
She was promoted Admiral when she retired. I believe she was the first female Admiral in US Navy history.
Bump! Grognards, what's the name of that lady?


Admiral Grace Murray Hopper, USN (ret.)



Mynok -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 4:00:19 AM)

quote:

FOR linecounter EQUAL 1 TO 1000
PRINT "Mr. Frag, back to the working bench! Now! /CR"
linecounter = linecounter - 1
CONTINUE


Nothing like a nice infinite loop........



dtravel -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 4:08:12 AM)

[:'(]

COBOL runs the world. On UNIX and JCL servers.



Mr.Frag -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 4:12:28 AM)

quote:

COBOL runs the world.


FORTRAN runs the wold, COBOL just stores the results [:'(]



dtravel -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 4:20:22 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mr.Frag

quote:

COBOL runs the world.


FORTRAN runs the wold, COBOL just stores the results [:'(]


Then I guess its a good thing I know both! [:D]



Rainer -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 4:27:58 AM)

Oh please, don't forget PL/1 and RPG!
And that little toy from Mr. Pascal called Wirth. Or was it the other way around?[&:]
Anybody remember JCL?!

MODERATOR: Will you please interfer to stop that, or at least move it into another rubrique so sane people can go on and exchange important messages about WitP, patches to be released any day, UN, reconquest of Mars, reduced beer consum at Münchener Oktoberfest, Frodo's professional future and other pressing matters?! For crying out loud! [:-]



Rainer -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 4:34:33 AM)

Admiral Hopper! How could I forget! Bummer[:@]
Thanks mate [;)]



Yamato hugger -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 8:43:31 AM)

Wow -- Mister Frag sure is full of himself isnt he?

McDonalds LOST a lawsuit because a woman spilled hot coffee on herself. Anyone can be sued by anyone. And anyone can win.

"case dismissed" indeed.



Tankerace -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 8:50:16 AM)

Ok, that's it. BEcause of reading this thread I missed 2.253 seconds of Monty Python's Flying Circus. I hearby suing all of you for... ah who the hell knows, Im not a lawyer.

[:D][:D][:D][:D]



dtravel -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 8:56:08 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Tankerace

Ok, that's it. BEcause of reading this thread I missed 2.253 seconds of Monty Python's Flying Circus. I hearby suing all of you for... ah who the hell knows, Im not a lawyer.

[:D][:D][:D][:D]


Infliction of Emotional Distress. [:D]

(And I think the answer to the thread's title is now a very definite "Yes". [:'(])



Harpoon_GER -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 11:02:44 AM)

I spilled my hot coffee in laughter over this thread....

Who can I sue for it??!? [:D]



tsimmonds -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 2:38:09 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harpoon_GER

I spilled my hot coffee in laughter over this thread....

Who can I sue for it??!? [:D]

What we need is an amendment to the Constitution declaring that even a moron should know that coffee is hot[sm=nono.gif]



kayjay -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 3:14:38 PM)

Radm Grace Hopper, USN ret. 1906-1992.
Also coined the term 'bug' that we use today to refer to program errors.

"In 1946, Hopper joined the Harvard Faculty at the Computation Laboratory where she continued her work on the Mark II and Mark III. She traced an error in the Mark II to a moth trapped in a relay, coining the term bug. This bug was carefully removed and taped to the log book"

My masters thesis was a COBOL program on punch (aka Hollerith) cards.



Szilard -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 3:25:59 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Rainer

Sh..! I've forgotten the lady's name.
She was promoted Admiral when she retired. I believe she was the first female Admiral in US Navy history.
Bump! Grognards, what's the name of that lady?


The programming language was Ada, and her name was Admiral Somebodyorother.



Mr.Frag -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 4:09:19 PM)

quote:

McDonalds LOST a lawsuit because a woman spilled hot coffee on herself. Anyone can be sued by anyone. And anyone can win.


McDonalds did NOT loose, the case was reversed on appeal and the woman was nailed with paying their legal fees. Being stupid is not grounds for suing someone and winning.



pasternakski -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 6:39:27 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Harpoon_GER

I spilled my hot coffee in laughter over this thread....

Who can I sue for it??!? [:D]


Anybody you want. And I know where you can get a lawyer cheap (not to be confused with a cheap lawyer).



pasternakski -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 6:52:16 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Mr.Frag

McDonalds did NOT loose, the case was reversed on appeal and the woman was nailed with paying their legal fees. Being stupid is not grounds for suing someone and winning.


Frag, you ignorant slut (or was that Jane Curtin?). The jury awarded $200,000 in compensatory damages (reduced to $160,000 on a finding that the plaintiff was 20 percent at fault for spilling the coffee). The jury also awarded $2.7 million in punitive damages (equal to about two days' worth of McDonalds's coffee sales).

The trial court reduced the punitive award to $480,000 (three times the compensatory damages), calling McDonalds's conduct "reckless, callous, and willful" (shoot, I thought that was the name of their law firm).

The parties eventually entered into a sealed settlement that has never been opened to the public.

So the McDonalds lawyers got paid, the plaintiff's lawyers got paid, the plaintiff got paid a little, and McDonalds got the whole thing to go away.

Everybody went home happy. Especially the lawyers (including the trial judge, who got to shoot his mouth off at McDonalds's expense). Ain't we great?



Yamato hugger -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 7:54:58 PM)

quote:

McDonalds did NOT loose, the case was reversed on appeal


If they didnt loose, there would have been NOTHING to appeal bone head. Now did they prevail ultimately, yes. Did they win? LOL how much money did they spend "winning"?? Make no mistake, they lost.



dereck -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 10:03:39 PM)

Her name was Grace Hopper.

COBOL incidentally stands for Common Business Oriented Language. Being a COBOL programmer has been my bread and butter for nearly the past 20 years.



Tankerace -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 10:15:43 PM)

The best law firm:

Dewey, Cheetham, and Howe.

I love the Three Stooges [:D]



dtravel -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 11:03:07 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: dereck

COBOL incidentally stands for Common Business Oriented Language. Being a COBOL programmer has been my bread and butter for nearly the past 20 years.


*cough*microfocus*cough*

[:D]



Tankerace -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/5/2004 11:10:21 PM)

You have my condolensces. [:D]



dereck -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/6/2004 5:09:01 AM)

No, not Microfocus (though I DID have it on my personal computer back in the early 1990's along with the OS/2 operating system and DB2) ... mainly VAX COBOL and IBM Mainframe ... on PC's I use Oracle PL/SQL [:D]



dereck -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/6/2004 5:09:50 AM)

Condolences for what pray tell?



Tankerace -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/6/2004 6:11:13 AM)

LOL....having to use COBOL on a day to day basis. I went insane after using it 2 and a half hours a day for 9 weeks. [:D]



Mr.Frag -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/6/2004 6:24:13 AM)

Could be worse, could be stuck in Focus [:'(]



dtravel -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/6/2004 9:40:48 AM)

Three plus years Microfocus COBOL on UNIX servers for 911 Dispatch systems.

Before that MF/COBOL on VAX/JCL platform.



Pier5 -> RE: Is This A Joke? (10/6/2004 4:40:22 PM)

This is one of the more amazing threads I've seen here. The thread originator was complaining about a WALL MAP he bought from Matrix. How is a font change, a 60" monitor or any of the other totally irrelevant comments going to alter his WALL MAP.

Pier5



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