RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (Full Version)

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witpqs -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/25/2014 5:57:08 PM)

And look at your co-star!

[image]local://upfiles/14248/38D1813C6F1347FCABEFD5943731DA11.jpg[/image]




zuluhour -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 12:27:33 AM)

AHA! Now I know what that simian is staring at. HAI!




BBfanboy -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 6:27:40 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san find out Hiei not-ah aburh to rearm main guns even at Truk with rever 6 port and 260 navarh support.

Seem rike Japan-mens need cranes or not-ah buird guns so big.

Japan-mens sending new AE to Truk. Broody annoying. Fortunatery, Mandrake-san pran ahead and send two more BB's to Rabaurh to wait around. [:)]

Yes it will do the job. A 5400 ton capacity AKE can re-ammo the Iowa class 16"/50s. The 5700 ton AKE should be able to handle Yamato.




BBfanboy -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 6:31:57 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: zuluhour

AHA! Now I know what that simian is staring at. HAI!

Ooo! Ooo! I know what! Simian stare at watch! Simians like gadgets.
BTW - giruh need to eat more bananas.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 1:00:52 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: witpqs
Mandrake-san get more respect from now on. Last night noticed real reason for HOA backpedal on SyFy channel listings.

[image]local://upfiles/14248/ED1D4317D01E48CABCD9D17628A64D6D.jpg[/image]


You know, that is not really a flattering picture. When my agent saw that she made me start flossing.


Also, the debut on USA network hurt us, I think. I always thought the 3.6/10 rating was not representative. You know, Battleship Potemkin didn't do very well when first released either.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 1:03:46 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: BBfanboy


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

Mandrake-san find out Hiei not-ah aburh to rearm main guns even at Truk with rever 6 port and 260 navarh support.

Seem rike Japan-mens need cranes or not-ah buird guns so big.

Japan-mens sending new AE to Truk. Broody annoying. Fortunatery, Mandrake-san pran ahead and send two more BB's to Rabaurh to wait around. [:)]

Yes it will do the job. A 5400 ton capacity AKE can re-ammo the Iowa class 16"/50s. The 5700 ton AKE should be able to handle Yamato.



HAI! Thank you Fanboy-san. Mandrake-san now send this valuaburh ship to Rabuarh to support operation on Lord Howe Isrand. Maybe to Noumea if we manage to capture prace,




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 1:08:15 PM)

Buird up at Rabaurh. Staff frunkie not-ah send enough gasorine. Staff frunkie get sent to Paramashiro-jima

[image]local://upfiles/7983/447E1F7D2F8B4630923A3B39D8F236D6.jpg[/image]




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 1:20:06 PM)

SG get shoulder surgery yesterday. Good news...SG survive. Bad news...Mandrake-san have to do arr of housework aftah The Mayan get fired.

Rittah girhs herp out but Mandrake-san have to be very specific when giving orders. If Mandrake-san say "unroad dishes", rittah girhs just unroad dished but reave grasses.

Mandrake-san not-ah recommend insurance-womans. Insurance-womans try to get Mandrake-san to not fire craim. Mandrake-san nota-h say rearh name but midderh name "Greek" so Mandrake-san carr insurance-womans "**** the Greek ********".
Rike Jimmy "the Greek". It-ah bug crap out of insurance-womans office but a comprete raugh riot.

Insurance-womans: Mr. Mandrake, you did have a claim for $20,000 in 2006. Our actuaries predict a claim of that type every 11 years.

Mandrake-san: Apparentry pipes not-ah read actuary taburhs. <Mandrake-san raugh at own joke. Insurance-womans not amused>

Insurance-womans: I do need to advise you the company may require a higher deductible.

Mandrake-san: Hai! Mandrake-san take chance.

Insurance-womans: Also, I need to inform you that they may cancel the policy.

Mandrake-san: Ahh. That-ah rear shame. Mandrake-san stirr want too go ahead.

Insurance-womans: Very well, Mr. Mandrake. I will put that through. One other thing, Mr. Mandrake, have you been living abroad? The policy language requires this be your primary residence.






Chickenboy -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 2:07:22 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: BBfanboy


quote:

ORIGINAL: zuluhour

AHA! Now I know what that simian is staring at. HAI!

Ooo! Ooo! I know what! Simian stare at watch! Simians like gadgets.
BTW - giruh need to eat more bananas.


Not-ah necessarry. Giruh werr represented with fruit. She-ah have nice coconuts.




poodlebrain -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/26/2014 7:07:14 PM)

During filming were enough choreographers and dancers employed telling your story to keep several West Hollywood restaurants profitable? I like movies with song and dance numbers, and I know it's not easy to stage song and dance numbers like the one in Blazing Saddles.

Hard to believe you co-star is almost a senior citizen.




BBfanboy -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 3:53:43 AM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake
One other thing, Mr. Mandrake, have you been living abroad? The policy language requires this be your primary residence.


Oh Gawd! She has been reading the forum and knows about your Noumea HQ/residence/spa in WWII(c) and your Rabaurh HQ/residence/hot springs in WWII(d)!
You wirr have to contact your respective HQs for the officiah decraration that arr conquered territories are onry being occupied temporariry untirh the enemy threat is neutrarized.
Kinda rike the Green Zone in Baghdad.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 3:38:55 PM)

*******Aboard Ise, 30 nm west Kiriwina Atoll, 01:20, December 30, 1941(d)*****


Captain Takeda: Arr ahead furh. Hard a port! <srowly, the ship begins to answer the herm. He picks up the PA microphone> This-ah Captain Takeda. Everyone rook toward port.
<a beautifurh arc of aquamarine ruminescence forms astern>

Crew: AHHHHHHHH! OOOOOOOHHHHH!




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 3:47:04 PM)

********Oceanfront Virra, Truk, December 31, 1941(c)*********

Mandrake-san: Wait, staff terring me Ise not-ah bombard Port Moresby for 2nd night in row? What part of "brow up" idiot Takeda not understand?





Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 6:12:10 PM)

**********December 30, 1941(d)***************

Port Moresby: Whire Ise off Kiriwina Atorh rooking at prankton, 4th Div start randing.
Rots of RAMF's farh into watah. Japan-mens drop entire tank into watah.

Amphibious Assault at Port Moresby (98,130)

TF 6 troops unloading over beach at Port Moresby, 98,130

Japanese ground losses:
110 casualties reported
Squads: 11 destroyed, 0 disabled
Non Combat: 10 destroyed, 0 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 1 (1 destroyed, 0 disabled)
Vehicles lost 1 (1 destroyed, 0 disabled)

17 troops of a IJA Inf Squad lost from landing craft during unload of 4th Div /12
12 troops of a IJA HMG Section lost from landing craft during unload of 4th Div /12
17 troops of a IJA Inf Squad lost in surf during unload of 4th Div /8
75mm T41 Rgt Gun lost overboard during unload of 4th Div /8
20 troops of a IJA Const Labor Sq lost from landing craft during unload of 1st Ind Engr Rgt
17 troops of a IJA Inf Squad lost in surf during unload of 4th Div /10
17 troops of a IJA Inf Squad lost from landing craft during unload of 4th Div /10
12 troops of a IJA HMG Section lost in surf during unload of 4th Div
17 troops of a IJA Inf Squad lost in surf during unload of 4th Div
17 troops of a IJA Inf Squad lost overboard during unload of 4th Div /13
15 Aviation Support troops accidentally lost during unload of 32nd Special Base Force /2
15 Support troops lost in surf during unload of 4th Div /14
15 Support troops lost in surf during unload of 4th Div /15
Type 95 Light Tank dropped into water during unload of 2nd Tank Rgt
15 Support troops accidentally lost during unload of 16th Army
15 Support troops lost overboard during unload of 16th Army
15 Support troops lost in surf during unload of 16th Army
15 Support troops lost in surf during unload of 16th Army



Actuarry, Japan-mens not-ah upset. Randing forces in amazingry good shape

[image]local://upfiles/7983/0A15D215308E4CFDB52D82BB0D407C3A.jpg[/image]

Japan-mens attack tomorrow. Ise get-ah one more chance. Othah ships move out.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 6:18:41 PM)

Borneo: Japan-mens capture Pontianak.....and '36 Ordsmobire too.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 6:20:36 PM)

Fiji: Arried-mens cruiser approaching from SW. 144th Regiment have to wait a couperh of days to unroad.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 6:24:55 PM)

Hawaii: Japan-mens submarines spot 5 troop transports moving SW 600 m ENE Hiro. Probabry reinforcements for South Pacific. Bettah capture Fiji and New and Improved Scotrand quickry.




sprior -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 7:45:43 PM)

What he said,

[image]local://upfiles/6847/7605A2A08FB94D30B4C388206EAB86F0.jpg[/image]




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 8:08:58 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: sprior

What he said,

[image]local://upfiles/6847/7605A2A08FB94D30B4C388206EAB86F0.jpg[/image]


Hai! Mandrake-san recognize Ensign McGoo from wwii(c) Now Japan-mens rearry inspired and not so afraid of Free France-mens on New and Improved Scotrand.

Even so, this time Japan-mens rand at Koumac and take train down to Noumea.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 8:13:16 PM)

SG(II) see Pocahantas girh swapping spit with Saul, gardener with Jewish-mens name.

Aftahward, Saul bring out toorh and trim birch trees. [:-]

Meanwhire Mandrake-san paying furr market rates. For gardener, Mandrake-san mean.




BBfanboy -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 8:17:05 PM)


quote:

ORIGINAL: Cap Mandrake

SG(II) see Pocahantas girh swapping spit with Saul, gardener with Jewish-mens name.

Aftahward, Saul bring out toorh and trim birch trees. [:-]

Meanwhire Mandrake-san paying furr market rates. For gardener, Mandrake-san mean.

[:D][:D][:D]
You should also specify what services you are getting from the gardener, since he apparently has a diverse range available.[;)]




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 8:20:40 PM)

What Canada-mans think? Cut grass and crap rike that. [:D]




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 8:25:40 PM)

Don't terr SPrior-san but Mandrake-san compretery forget about China rast turn. [:)][:)]




Chickenboy -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 8:33:55 PM)

You brame staff?




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/27/2014 8:43:06 PM)

Giving orders in China rike washing arm pits. Nobody rikes doing but **** eventurarry hit fan if not done.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/28/2014 3:20:55 PM)

***********December 31, 1941(d)***********

Happy New Year Arried-dogs!

Port Moresby: Ise finarry finish sight-seeing cruise and just compretery fratten prace aftah stern tarking to from CIC. Port damage 100%, airway damage 78%. Now Japan-mens have to rebuird everything and have onry crappy Daihatsu bulldozers that rook freaking rike
chirdren's toys compared to SeeBees stuff.

This time, Japan-mens bring enough Japan-mens.

Ground combat at Port Moresby (98,130)

Japanese Deliberate attack

Attacking force 13034 troops, 101 guns, 90 vehicles, Assault Value = 474

Defending force 4804 troops, 49 guns, 31 vehicles, Assault Value = 135

Japanese engineers reduce fortifications to 0

Japanese adjusted assault: 224

Allied adjusted defense: 63

Japanese assault odds: 3 to 1 (fort level 0)

Japanese forces CAPTURE Port Moresby !!!

Allied aircraft
no flights

Allied aircraft losses
Catalina I: 1 destroyed
Hudson I: 2 destroyed

Combat modifiers
Defender: terrain(+), preparation(-), experience(-)
Attacker:

Japanese ground losses:
120 casualties reported
Squads: 0 destroyed, 22 disabled
Non Combat: 0 destroyed, 6 disabled
Engineers: 0 destroyed, 5 disabled

Allied ground losses:
1849 casualties reported
Squads: 55 destroyed, 41 disabled
Non Combat: 85 destroyed, 6 disabled
Engineers: 10 destroyed, 0 disabled
Guns lost 27 (26 destroyed, 1 disabled)
Vehicles lost 23 (23 destroyed, 0 disabled)
Units retreated 7

Assaulting units:
4th Division
2nd Tank Regiment
1st Ind Engineer Regiment
16th Army
32nd Special Base Force

Defending units:
NG Vol Rifles Battalion
2/1st Ind Coy
Lark Battalion
49th Australian Battalion
Papuan Inf Battalion
13th Field Regiment
15th RAN Base Force




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/28/2014 3:25:18 PM)

Arso, crazy Dutch-mens with amazing psychic abirity waiting for Japan-mens returning to Rabaurh through Jomard passage.
Mandrake-san impressed. Unfortunatery, this-ah end for Dutch Rasputin-mens.

Day Time Surface Combat, near Milne Bay at 100,135, Range 24,000 Yards

Japanese Ships
BB Nagato, Shell hits 1
BB Hyuga
DD Umikaze
DD Suzukaze
DD Nenohi
DD Hatsushima, Shell hits 1
DD Hatakaze
DD Tsuga
DD Yanagi

Allied Ships
DD Van Nes, Shell hits 7, heavy fires, heavy damage
DD Van Ghent, Shell hits 5, and is sunk


Bad thing for Japan-mens is Nagato and Hyuga use up harf of main gun ammo and now wait for AKE to arrive.




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/28/2014 3:32:54 PM)

Canton, isrand not city: Arried-mens ships arr ovah prace. Not-ah afraid Japan-mens carriers because know exacatary where are.
Arried-mens just brow up mating pair of Brue Footed Boobies but-ah make Mandrake-san wondah if transports near Hawaii headed to take back Canton? Hmmmm? Japan-mens have memoriarh ceremony for Brue Footed Boobies and then make soup out them. Boobie soup taste rike...ah nevah mind.
Japan-mens send minerayer to Canton and have to find recon pranes somewhere.

Night Naval bombardment of Canton Island at 153,143

Allied Ships
CL Raleigh

Runway hits 1

CL Raleigh firing at Canton Island




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/28/2014 3:47:35 PM)

Fiji: More annoying Arried-mens not-ah rearize war ovah.

[image]local://upfiles/7983/EF0A4152345B49599602E60B81F23B56.jpg[/image]




Cap Mandrake -> RE: A Hitchhiker's Guide to the Greater East Asia Co-prosperity Sphere (9/28/2014 4:02:53 PM)

Ruzon: Japan-mens sweep ovah Manira...Arried-mens fighters move to Bataan. It-ah rike freaking whack-a-morhe. Arried-mens sneak in at reast 1 AKL and maybe TK too? Maybe TK is actuary reaving.

Now CVL's in Suru Sea. That-ah end of such foorishness.




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